A Taste of Forever
by The Gospel of Eleanor Rigby
Summary: Claire didn't understand the sad look on Quil's face. She was just going to visit her Grandma, she'd be back. Wouldn't she? Seventeen year old Claire finds herself stuck in California, unknowingly hiding from everything she never knew she needed.
1. The Beginning

**A/N: I've always wanted to do a Quil/Claire story. The whole process of her leaving has been done before of course, but it's still fun to play around with! I hope you like it, because I worked damn hard on it.**

**Disclaimer: Remember this, I'm only writing it once. Stephenie Meyer is way cooler than me. She created amazing characters; I'm just stealing them from the pages of her wonderful series and tearing them apart!**

Claire Haynes was three years old. She loved all the things that normal three year olds did. She loved colouring, cookies before dinner, going in the water and sleeping in her big girl bed. Her older sister was her idol that did big girl things such as going to school, wearing frilly dresses and having adult conversations. But Claire wished she could stay little forever, because she had so much more than others.

She had Quil. Quil was her babysitter, her best friend and the man she believed she was going to marry one day. He was the boy who didn't mind when Claire put glitter in his hair or didn't put on an annoyed face when she asked him to play tea party. Quil even raised his pinkie the right way. She never wanted to grow up, she never wanted to lose him. She was afraid when she wasn't cute and little, Quil wouldn't want to play with her anymore.

They did a lot of things together. When Mommy and Daddy went to work, she would get dropped off at Aunt Emily's house where she would sit and sulk until Quil came in. He took her to the beach and to get ice cream even when she wasn't supposed to. He got in trouble a lot of times when he did that and Claire didn't like it when people yelled at Quil, but he would wink at her and make her laugh.

Sometimes she saw him more than her own parents and even that wasn't enough. One day, Quil had taken her for a walk at night and they had seen a shooting star. He told her that if she made a wish, it would come true. Claire didn't even have to think about it, she wished that she could keep Quil forever.

He was so big too. Claire told him at thanksgiving that she bet he could eat the whole turkey. Quil said he could definitely do that but that everyone would be mad at him if he did it. When they said Grace, everyone said they were thankful for good finance, blessed family and good health. Claire didn't care for any of that complicated stuff. And besides, she was only thankful for one thing in her life, which she announced. "I'm grateful for Quil." She had said.

He had grinned at her and everyone laughed and told her how cute she was. But her Mommy looked very angry; she even took Aunt Emily away from dinner to go outside where it was cold. Claire had only seen her Mommy that angry when she had accidentally knocked over her favourite vase and shattered it. She had gotten a spanking and Quil had held her when she cried. When she got a booboo, Quil had given her a band aid and a hug. In fact, she could never remember a time when Quil wasn't around to make her feel better. He was like tummy medicine when you have a bellyache.

She was sure that she loved him. Claire wanted Quil to ride up on a unicorn in a knight's costume and then he would take her away to a faraway castle. Or he could come in sweatpants with that beat up old red car he drives, bringing her ice cream and driving her back to Jacob's house to play with Nessie.

Claire didn't really care. She just wanted to be wherever Quil was. She liked to elaborate on that too. When Quil would tuck her in at Aunt Emily's house, she would always tell him that she loved him. "I love you." She told him tiredly.

He would kiss her on the forehead and chuckle. "I love you too Claire-Bear." And Claire would make him promise to stay with her forever, even when she was old and he didn't want to play tea party anymore.

"I couldn't leave if I tried." He would say. Claire didn't understand, but she didn't care. Because that meant he would stay and that was fine with her.

When she turned four, Nessie stopped coming over to play. When Nessie wasn't around, neither was Jacob and she missed them both. But Quil was there all the time, even at her birthday party. He had bought her the best present of all. It was a necklace on a black string with a wooden wolf carved in it. The string was long, it went down to her stomach. Quil told her that it was so that when she grew up, it would still fit so that he could see her wearing it.

She liked the idea of Quil being around so long down the road. So she munched happily on her slice of birthday cake while Quil and his friends ate three pieces each. She didn't understand how they could all eat so much at once! Mommy wouldn't let her wear the necklace because she was afraid she would lose it or break it, so it went into a box of Claire's things for when she was older. Claire didn't mind, it was still from Quil so it still made it the best present of all.

During the next months, she started seeing Quil less and less. Once, she didn't see him for a whole week! She cried and cried in her room, even when her Mommy, Daddy and her sister Danni asked her to go to the beach. She screamed and said that Quil was the only one allowed to take her there and then threw herself on the floor and kicked the whole way as they dragged her down there.

While she sat, cried out for Quil and sulked on the blanket, there was a howl in the background where the forest was. She didn't know what it was, but it sounded like a doggie in pain. She didn't like that sound, doggies were supposed to be happy weren't they?

The next day, Quil came to the house. But he didn't get to see Claire because Mommy wasn't very happy with him. She remembered sitting at the top of the stairs in Quil's view as her Mommy yelled at him. She said things like, "Claire is becoming too dependent on you and you're not even around anymore!" and "If you can't be with her when she needs you, you need to leave her alone. You can't keep coming and going as you please!" And Claire watched with tearstained cheeks as Mommy told Quil he wasn't allowed to come back to this house ever again. She sniffled as he sent her a pained glance before he left.

Claire cried some more while her Mom tried to comfort her and tell her that Quil would come back. But Claire screamed more and called her Mommy a liar. She never wanted to come out of her room and she never wanted to talk to anyone again. She hated her family and she missed Quil. At supper, she didn't even go downstairs to eat and she didn't even ask for a bedtime story that night. She cried till it was real late, almost ten and finally fell asleep.

Claire sat at the breakfast table and cried instead of eating. She wished Quil was there, he knew that she didn't like eggs and that she preferred milk to juice. Eventually, she cried herself to the point of being sick and then went to her room and slept the whole day.

Two more whole weeks had passed without Quil coming to see her. Claire cried once in the morning and once before she went to bed. During the day she would sulk and drag everywhere she went. Mommy was getting mad at her, yelling and getting upset with her. One day, she told Claire that she was being ridiculous when she did her annual crying session at the breakfast table. When she just cried some more and screamed for Quil, her Mom shoved her shoes on and carried her to the car. They drove the five minutes to Aunt Emily's house with Claire screaming in the back. Her Mom picked her up and carried her into the house while she kicked and squirmed.

The kitchen was filled with giant men and Emily. Claire kept screaming Quil's name over and over again until her Mom put her on the floor. She said, "I don't know what to do with her anymore." Then she had left Claire there on the kitchen floor and went back home.

Claire's red, tear filled eyes searched the room for the one person she wanted to find and when she came up with no result, she cried some more. Many of the other giant people with blurry faces tried to console her and tell her Quil would be back soon but she just rolled over and pounded her legs and arms on the ground and cried again. Aunt Emily had scooped her up a half an hour later for her to have some lunch when the door opened.

Jacob came in first, who Claire hadn't seen in a while. She stopped flailing around with his arrival and held out her arms to him. When he held her, she was surrounded by familiar heat. He rocked her back and forward in the living room as she blubbered for Quil. Jacob did his best to console her until Quil came back. It was about an hour after Claire's arrival that Quil entered the house through the front door, spotted Claire and took her into his arms. She was so happy that she clung to him with all her little four year old might and had to cry some more just because she was glad to see kept coming back around the house more and he took Claire places again. She was so happy that he was back, nothing seemed right without him. How could she learn to ride a bike without Quil there to kiss her booboo better? How could she start kindergarten without Quil to hold her hand? How could she celebrate a birthday without Quil to help her blow out the candles? Life just didn't fit without him. He was always supposed to be there.

Quil was the person who taught Claire how to tie her shoes. He was the one who had taught her how to count to ten and not to get rides with strangers. Even when they say they have candy, because apparently they really don't. Why would somebody lie like that?

Two months later, Mommy was on the phone before dinner. She said that Grandma was very sick and they were going to California so they could go visit her. Claire asked if Quil was going to come along and she got very mad. She said that Quil didn't need to go everywhere with her and that she could see him when she got back. Her Mommy said something about being independent.

A week later, a big truck pulled up at the house and strong people started putting furniture into it. Claire realised that they weren't as strong as Quil and his friends and wondered why the furniture needed to come with them to Grandma's house. Mommy said that the furniture would get lonely without them so they needed to take it with them. Her Daddy looked sad and he was looking at Claire with a sad face. She didn't understand why he was so sad. Did he not want to visit Grandma?

When Quil, Jacob, Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam came, they all looked sad too. She hated it when Quil was sad, it made her sad too. So she picked him a pretty purple flower off the lawn and gave it to him along with a picture she drew of him and her at the beach. Then she lifted her arms up and when he picked her up, she gave him a kiss on his cheek and said "I love you."

That's when her Mommy told her to get in the car because they were leaving. As they pulled away from the road, Claire stuck her pudgy face against the window and looked back at Quil. He was crying as he watched the car drive away. She was immediately crying too, she never knew Quil could cry. He was so big. He shouldn't have anything to cry about.

Claire didn't understand the sad look on his face. She was just going to visit her Grandma, she'd be back. Wouldn't she?

**A/N: And that's the preface. I already have the next two chapters out so as soon as I get five reviews for this, I'll bring the next one out. Remember to recommend me if you want to read more!**


	2. Missing Past

**A/N: I guess four reviews is the same as five! I promised someone I'd have this chapter out before I went to bed, so here you go!**

_Knock, knock._

"Five more minutes!" I groaned, burying my face in a pillow.

_Knock, knock, knock._

"Claire!" My mom called. "It's time to get up, it's after twelve." So what, the awake part of me argued internally. "Lunch is on the table and if you're not down in five minutes, I will get your father to carry you down."

I was awake officially at that moment and I flew out of bed and out the door before my mother could even take a step. "Not my father." I snapped, stalking past her as she mumbled something I didn't bother to listen to. I'm sure I looked just pleasant with my scowl; un-brushed teeth, slept on hair and slouchy posture but my step-father still made an effort to be nice. I didn't respond to him as I sat down in my chair and crossed my legs just for the hell of it. I also really had to pee.

I looked down at the slop on my plate and grimaced. Obviously, my mom tried to cook today. "Don't worry. Its half edible." My step father Brian joked with me. I offered him a half smile because he wasn't really that bad. It's just that he wasn't my father. And he never would be.

My parents had a… disagreement. As they call it. When I was seven, they divorced. Apparently, they had been having that same argument since I was four and eventually decided to call it quits. My mom and dad head butted and clashed on different beliefs about something that was never explained no matter how much I begged my mom.

Dad used to visit me once a year, always coming here. That continued until I was eleven when he suggested I spend a week or two with him in La Push. Mom had a cow. I can still remember her screaming at him on the phone as he managed to stay calm. I haven't heard from him since and that was six years ago. So I guess I couldn't ask him about the subject either. My Aunt Emily lives on the La Push reservation as well… She has a better relationship with Dad than Mom, her own sister. Actually, I've never heard them talk before. She called me once and my mom slammed the receiver down so hard that it actually broke.

We used to live on the Makah reservation, not too far from there. But now, we live here in sunny California. Big change isn't it?

It's not that I don't like it here… Actually, that is the case. The sun is too predictable, the people act fake and the place is so overrated. Good for a vacation but to live, no. I love the rain, it barely rains around here. I've always wanted to build a snowman or catch snowflakes on my tongue. I have never seen snow before, there's rarely any place around here that snows and by the time you drive all the way there to see it, it's melted already.

Besides, I don't look like the stereotypical California mall rat. My hair wasn't bleached blonde, it was a deep chestnut. It wasn't long or silky and straight, it was just above my shoulders and annoyingly curly. My skin wasn't a fake orange tan; it was naturally dark and creamy. I wasn't tall, slender and chesty either. In fact, I don't even think I broke the five foot mark. I was toned though, because I played volleyball. And I was insulted by my lack of a chest, merely a 32 B. My eyes were brown, just plain brown.

Plain, ah, that word was used to much in my life. I was Claire, the plain Jane. I was a good buddy, but not datable material. People would ask to be my partner in class but when it came to after school activities, was I ever invited? Nope, you guessed it. I suppose it was my old fault for being antisocial but whenever someone got too close to me, I would back away. So that's probably why I didn't have any friends here. That and the fact that this place held no interest for me so I would probably bolt out of here the first chance I got when I finally turned eighteen and having no social life or friends would make the whole goodbye thing very bearable.

Would I miss my mom? Sure, but not too much. It's not like I'd never see her again and I always got along with my dad better anyway. She had Brian anyway and to my surprise, a baby on the way. She was five months pregnant. I thought it was weird because she was so old and there would be a 17 year difference between us but my mom just shrugged and said there was nothing she could do about it now.

It was sort of gross to think of the things they did while I was under the roof to achieve that but I was happy that my mom was happy. Plus, Danni usually came home to visit a lot from college. She lived nearby, so why did it matter if I didn't?

Plus, I missed Dad a lot more than I realised. I missed talking to him over the phone at night and getting so excited when he would tell me that he was coming up for his yearly visit. I remember crying every time he left, begging him to take me with him. I knew he wanted to. He missed me just as much. In fact, I never understood why my dad never filed for custody. He didn't even put up an argument when Mom took both me and Danni.

I realised I had been staring off into space when my mom hit me over the head with her little wooden spoon. She had on an apron that said 'Kiss the Cook' and was frowning at me with her hands on her hips. She looked so motherly that I had to giggle at her. That got Brian laughing and pretty soon, we were all in hysterics. After, she smiled brightly at me and turned away, forgetting about whatever lecture she was going to give me.

Hum, so what was on my schedule for today? Oh right, a big fat nothing! I sighed. "I really hate summer."

"Maybe if you actually took time to make friends, then you wouldn't be so bored." My mother chastised me from her position over the sinking cleaning dishes. "Maybe even get yourself a boyfriend."

I giggled. "Mom, I don't sit around and make friends at all. What makes you think I'm capable of landing a boy?"

She looked thoughtful. "The Marks' next door have a son. He's real nice, and such a gentleman."

"The nerdy freshman with the acne and glasses? No thanks Mom, I'll stick with being a single, antisocial loser." I smiled triumphantly as she scowled because she hated that I never wanted to make friends. I told her that I hated it here and that the girls around here were not my type of people to hang out with. That's about the time she got mad and snapped at me, saying this was my life and I'd have to get used to it.

The subject of living anywhere than California really pissed her off so I usually avoided it unless I wanted to purposely make her angry. Especially now that she was hormonal and pregnant because even the littlest mention of how I missed Dad would get her seething. She really hated La Push, my father, her own sister and any of the people associated with them.

Honestly, I didn't remember any of the people from La Push. It was probably because we left when I was four but still. Not even a single memory. It's like my mom had gone into my brain while I was asleep and washed all the pictures out. It sort of made me sad, not remembering or knowing people who had probably babysat me or been a big part of my life. Not even my childhood friends, aka my only friends. Ever. "I miss Dad." I moaned aloud accidentally.

My mom's face twisted into a scowl and she turned to yell at me, her slightly pregnant belly hitting the milk on the counter and sending it flying on the ground. Suddenly, her face crumpled and she had started crying. I really wanted to use the phrase, there's no use crying over spilled milk, but I didn't think that would really help the situation. So I sat watching awkwardly as Brian rushed over to comfort her. "Can you get me a towel from the hall closet?" He asked me.

I jumped quickly, anything to get out of that room. My house was a quaint cottage like thing, perfect for a family of four. It was wooden and smelt of honeysuckle and vanilla and air freshener. Oddly, it was a nice scent. The second most refreshing scent I've ever smelt. The first would be the musky, wet scent of the woods and the bark, the grass and the fresh nature. It was like a sanctuary to me. I always snuck out my window at night to the forest that we lived by. It was a stupid forest, more California style than I would have liked, but the scent was there. And I inhaled it as I sat on the ground for at least an hour. It lulled my body to sleep. Sometimes I fell asleep out there, on the grass, curled up under a tree.

Then I'd wake up and pray no one noticed I was out all night. They didn't. Either I got in right at the nick of time or they thought I had gotten up early and went out to the beach or the boardwalk for a stroll. While I was wearing my pyjamas and had grass stains on my knees.

Idiots.

The hall closet was packed with stuff, cluttering everywhere. Mom never usually let me look at any of this stuff, let alone go in the closet. I don't know why, it wasn't like a magical wardrobe about to send me to Narnia was it? Something magic was waiting for me in there? I chuckled and shook my head, grabbing a towel from the back of the middle shelf. Unfortunately, I lifted my head too early and smacked it hard off the other loose shelf, completely knocking it half off and the content of it slid off. I had no idea what was up there because I wasn't tall enough to see and getting a chair would set off my mom's radars and she would freak out as usual.

A massive cardboard box fell at my feet, spilling a content of letters, drawings, pictures and trinkets to the floor. I didn't know what this stuff was, letters from my mom's past? An ex-boyfriend perhaps? I was curious never the less, so I got on my knees and starting sorting through everything. Imagine my surprise when I looked at the name on the letters.

Claire Haynes.

They were for me. I ripped one open and looked at the date sent. They had started coming when I was seven. They were from someone whose name I didn't recognize at all. Who in the world was Quil? As the years stretched on, the letters began getting shorter and shorter. The final one was dated this month and it was one line short. No signature or anything. It was a simple question.

_Did you forget me?_

The page was stained with dark patches which I ruled out to be tears. I knew that because my tears made the same mark as the rolled off my face and splattered onto the paper. For some reason, this mysterious stranger's pain was apparently my pain also. Another half of the letters was from my dad. _Claire-Bear, I miss you. Why don't you write to me? Do you miss me too? Claire, are you ignoring me? Are you mad at me? Sorry. _The letters were all related to those sentences someway. In one letter, he apologized for not being able to continue our visits and then he apologized because he couldn't explain why. In another, he expressed how much it hurt him when I didn't write back.

My heart was silently breaking in my chest as tears rolled harder and faster down my cheeks. He missed me too. My dad, who I thought I had forgotten me, had been writing to me since I was eleven.

And my mom had hidden it from me.

Then I remembered that I was only here to get a towel and someone would probably come looking for me any second. So I shoved everything back into the box, shoved the shelf in the closet and shut it. After throwing the box in my room and delivering the towel, I excused myself as quick as possible without giving myself away. Brian told me he was going to take my mother out to cheer her up and I mentally added on more points for Brian in my head. I hummed and hawed around the kitchen anxiously until they left and then I bolted into my room so fast that I slipped and fell on my butt, right in front of the cardboard box.

I read every single letter in that box. I cried more than I had in the past ten years, actually feeling emotions for once. And I was angry at my mother, so angry. How could she hide something like this from me? As I was reading one of Dad's letters, my eyes froze on the end of it. Because scrawled neatly in the corner was his phone number.

And then I was running and sobbing at the same time to get my cell phone. I dialled his number as fast as I could, sweaty palms and beating heart. The dial tone rang in my ear over and over again and just as I was about to assume no one was home and hang up, the phone clicked. "Hello?" The familiar scratchy voice picked up.

And then I was heaving and sniffling so hard that I couldn't talk. I could hear the noise in the background and knew he had company. I should have hung up and called back later but I couldn't, no matter how rude I was being. "Daddy?" I whispered.

And just like that, all the voices in the background stopped talking and someone's breathing picked up. "C-Claire-Bear?" He choked back.

I closed my eyes and relished in the huskiness of his voice that I missed so much. "I missed you." I told him.

"You never wrote me back." He murmured.

"I never even knew." So then I told him the whole story about finding the letters and he just listened as I sobbed and blabbered. And finally, I said the words I'd been dying to say my whole life. "Daddy, I want to come home." That's about the time that the front door opened and I panicked, locking my bedroom door and lowering my voice. "I'll have to call you back later. Mom's back so I can't get caught, make sure you answer when your phone rings tonight." Then I paused and considered my next sentence. "I love you." And before he could reply, I pressed the end call button and slumped against the door, pulling the box towards me.

I sorted through everything. There were teddy bears, drawings that looked like they were drawn by a two year old, little macaroni pictures, books with engravings from Aunt Emily or Uncle Sam, stuffed wolves, a beaded and woven bracelet. All of these things seemed to be gifts and memories from La Push. The last thing I pulled out hit me with the most emotion because somehow, I recognized it.

It was a necklace with a thick black string that had a carved wolf hanging from it. The back was engraved and it said: "To Claire, love Quil."

And there was his name again. I nearly ripped my hair out of my own skull. Who was he? Why didn't I remember him? So I scrambled through the pictures and flipped through them anxiously, they all had dates and names written on the back.

Claire and Nessie. Claire and Jacob. Claire and Emily. Claire and Sam. These pictures had to be at least thirteen years old because the little girl in the picture couldn't be more than four or five. But even as I flipped through more pictures, I couldn't find the mysterious man whose name had just appeared everywhere all of a sudden.

Claire and Danni, Claire and John.

Then finally, I picked up the last picture at the bottom corner of the box that had been stuck when I dumped the box over and was flipped backwards. And what I saw, was astonishing. If my hair could have turned gray from shock, it would have. Every part of me trembled as I inspected the photo over and over again. It was impossible.

Because there he was, his chocolate brown eyes twinkled in the lighting like I remembered. His black hair hung the same, slightly shaggy and softly on his forehead. His white teeth contradicted and flashed against his dark, russet skin.

It was the man that has starred in my dreams all my life. And he was holding me.

And then, I was angry. No, I was downright furious. I threw everything back into the box carelessly with hasty hands and kept a tight grip on the picture as I unlocked my door and travelled into the kitchen where my mom was leaning against the table. I slammed the box down in front of her and thrust the picture in her face. "What the hell is this?" I growled.

She sighed. "Where did you get this?" She asked me, her voice was thick with exhaustion.

My blood boiled. "What the _hell_ is this!" I repeated again, nearly screaming in her face. "You kept this from me? You knew who he was! I can't believe this. You made me think I was going crazy, you made me think _my own father_ didn't love me! How could you? No, how dare you?"

I watched her rub her eyes tiredly and glance up. "I did this to protect you sweetheart."

"Protect me?" I asked, in a low voice. "Protect me. That's a load of bullshit!" I exclaimed, slamming both my palms on the table. "You want to protect me, I didn't ask for that. You're protecting me from something I don't even know about!"

"When you are older, you will understand." She said in a tight, calm voice.

I laughed bitterly. "Older? Open your eyes Mom! I'm seventeen! I am not a child. You had no right, you had absolutely no right." I seethed.

"I had every right. I am your mother."

"Oh really, are you? Because the mother I thought I knew didn't keep things from me. And so what? He is my father! Does that mean shit to you? Did you enjoy it, making me feel like the person I loved the most wanted nothing to do with me? Do you think I wouldn't remember the way you yelled at him over the phone and told him never to come back? Lies. You told me it was for my own good, that he never really loved me." I kept ranting, glaring at her through narrowed eyes. "I believed you, because I trusted you! I loved him more than anything and you took that away from me! I cried for weeks, mother. _WEEKS!"_ And embarrassingly enough, I started sobbing again.

And then she started to speak before I realised I wasn't done. "And Quil, you knew. You knew that he was the one in my dreams. I told you that I thought I was insane. You took me to a damn psychologist! You made me think that I was a freak. You were the one that never loved me. You used my own sanity against me to keep that little secret that you think you're protecting from!"

I watched her eyes tear up in satisfaction. "What do you want from me, Claire?" She asked in the strongest voice she could muster through tears.

"I want-" I started, realising what I actually wanted. "I want to go home."

She blinked. "You are home Claire."

I rolled my eyes, she was so fucking clueless. "No I'm not. I want to go live with Dad. I want to go home, I-" I paused to take a deep, calming breath, avoiding my mother's gaze like the plague. "I want to go to La Push."


	3. Going Home

**A/N: No Quil is this chapter, sorry! But I've added in plenty of Jacob goodness, who doesn't love him? And Nessie, Sam and Emily too! The rest of the pack will be there in the next chapter!**

The living room was silent. Awkwardly so, as the dial tone on the phone rang through the air shrilly. I kept my eyes on the phone in the middle of the coffee table as I sat across from Brian and my mom. I fiddled with my thumbs as my mom sighed exasperated. "Claire, this is ridiculous. You're not going."

"I'm going." I replied in a clipped tone. "I'm either going now or a year from now, so make your choice. Would you rather me move down there now and be a part of my life or have me leave when I'm eighteen and never want to come back again?" She didn't answer and I rolled my eyes.

"I just don't understand." I heard her murmur and I sighed. "We've lived in California as long as you can probably remember. This should be your home now." I groaned at my mom's "reasons" because she just couldn't understand.

She stared at me, waiting for an answer. "Mom, don't you get it? Do you finally understand why I hate it here? The people! You can't make a home in a place away from the people you love. I want to live with Dad, I want to rekindle my old friendship with Nessie, I want to finally meet Quil, the man that had been haunting my dreams all my life. It's home there because that's where the people I love are."

"But, I'm here in California." She trembled, eyes filling with tears.

I sighed. "Mom, you're going to have a baby. You're remarried. You've learned how to move on, you can start again. You know I love you, but I just can't stay here anymore. If you loved me the way I love you, you'd let me go and be happy again just like I'm trying to let you do. Dad makes me happy. And Quil, well I don't know why, but he sort of feels like my lifeline. I don't even know him that well and I ache for him, my whole body. Does that not prove anything?"

She was looking at me sadly. "Oh, Claire, when did you grow up so fast?"

My dad answered the phone. "Claire?"

"Hi Dad, so are we doing this? Or are we doing this? Cause I packed two days ago and I'm finally ready to go home." I smiled.

I could hear his own smile in his voice as he answered me. "You'll need to get a plane ticket first, honey."

I laughed. "Details, Dad! That can be taken care of in a second!"

Then it was Mom who stepped in, voice sort of loud for talking to someone sitting almost beside her. "I'll take you to get it, Claire. She'll be there in a week." I smiled at her, hugging her tight. I knew she would come around.

"So I guess I'll see you in a week." He murmured to me.

Just the sound of his voice made my heart ache. Right now, I was a seven year old girl, crying under the table while Mommy and Daddy yelled at each other and begging Daddy not to go when he kissed my forehead and told me he'd see me soon.

I swallowed, suddenly nervous. "Yeah, I'll see you then…"

"Bye, Claire. Can't wait to see you, I love you."

"Love you too Dad. See you in a week." Then, the line went dead as my mother clicked the end button. I wiped a few stray tears from my eyes and gave her my best, enthusiastic smile. "Thanks so much. I'm going to head off to bed now. Cause you know, it's late." I dashed off to my room because my mom was either going to console me or yell at me some more. I don't know which one was worse.

So I locked my door, curled up in my bed and cried against my pillow, for everything that I had lost and missed.

* * *

The week drug by so slowly, making "extra" precautions and waiting. The waiting was the worst. My mom was constantly on alert, watching whatever I did with wary eyes. I couldn't eat breakfast without her watching my reaction, especially as the day of my departure neared closer and closer. I think she was waiting for me to change my mind and cry to her about how much I never wanted to leave her.

Not going to happen because I already had a game plan. Dad and Aunt Emily had gone down to the high school and enrolled me for the rest of my high school career. I was going to be moving down there for good or at least until I was an adult and decided to move somewhere else.

Not likely.

I had talked to Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam on the phone as well. They said they had a big group of friends who wanted to see me. I'd say meet me, but that's a loose term for them I guess. No one except the three of them and Jacob Black knew I was coming; they wanted it to be a surprise I'm guessing.

But anyway, I had been waiting anxiously all week for this day to arrive. Now, it was finally here. And I was scared shitless, pardon my French. I was standing right in front of the gates, holding my carry on tightly to me as I stared at my teary eyed five month pregnant mother and her erratic new husband. I had around five minutes to say goodbye before I start crying and demanding to be taken home. I mean, my mother was pushy and everything, but isn't everyone's mom? I love my mom so much, it breaks my heart to leave her behind, even if she is clueless and mean.

"So, you have everything and I guess I'll see you at Christmas?" My mom sniffed.

I laughed and hugged her. "Mom, you have four months before the baby's born. Please don't tell me that you want me to miss that!" And then, I started crying. Burying my face in her shoulder, I molded myself awkwardly around her stomach. "I'm going to." Sob. "Miss you so much." She rocked me back and forward, kissing my tiny head.

"We'll see each other. Promise, it's not the end of our relationship. I love you baby girl, stay safe. Don't give your dad a hard time and don't spend all of your money on the first day." Always a mother. I hugged my step-father awkwardly and he smiled.

I wiped my tears from my cheeks and spared them one last glance before I turned around and left.

The plane ride was long and boring, filled with tears, waiting and boredom. The boy beside me was about twenty years old, cute and cheerful. He was creeping me out though, with his god awful pale skin and red eyes. Who in the world has red eyes? But I could only focus on him for so long before I got anxious and started tapping my hands on the tray in front of me.

I was watching a TV show when he touched my arm. I jumped; it felt like someone had spilled ice on me. "Wow, you're freezing! Do you want me to turn on the heat?" I reached up and he caught my arm.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm just naturally cold. I wanted to know if we could talk, I love good company." And then he sniffed my arm. "Has anyone ever told you that you smell…" He paused, searching for the right word. "Absolutely mouth-watering?" I sniffed the same arm and frowned. I smelt like soap and laundry detergent.

But he was grinning at me. God, he was so cute. "Uh no but you know, thanks." We talked for the rest of the flight. I learned that his family had been killed a long time ago and he had been orphaned until the ripe age of eighteen when he was finally an adult. I think I leaked out a few tears during that story. I told him about my mom's side of the family, not my dad's because I barely knew them. I also learned his name was Alan.

When we got off the plane, before I even had a chance to search for my dad or Aunt and Uncle or even get my bags, somebody grabbed my wrist. It wasn't cold or anything, it was scalding hot. I was yanked back against a wall or a chest, lifted up and spun around. I looked up to see my mystery capturer. "Jacob?" I murmured to the recognizable face. "You haven't changed a bit."

"Can't really say the same to you, can I? Still take naps?" He asked, laughing.

I rolled my eyes. "No. Still an asshole?"

"You betcha." He grinned and then he randomly sniffed my hair. I watched his nose crinkle in distaste. I smelt my hair, it smelt like normal shampoo. I didn't understand, either I smelt good or bad. "Claire, did you put on too much perfume?"

I blanched. "I'm not wearing perfume, I swear."

He sniffed again. "Are you sure? Because it's really overpowering, it's too sweet. Like it burns my nostrils…" His eyes narrowed for a tiny second before they lit up with an angry realization. "Claire, go get your bags please." I didn't argue. I got my two suitcases and frowned, most of my clothes were summer and it was freezing here. I guess I'd need to go shopping. Then, I spotted an older woman with a set of scars running down her face, looking in my direction with recognition.

Definitely Aunt Emily because beside her Jacob and another giant man, probably Uncle Sam, were in a heated discussion, creases in their foreheads included. "Claire!" She called out, waving me over. I grunted, rolling my suitcases over there with difficulty because they were almost as big as I was. So when I got there, I dropped everything on the ground, including myself.

"I swear to God, they should make suitcases for the heightly challenged." I complained, resting my head on the back of one. I watched Uncle Sam look over at me, smile and then crinkle his nose much in the same way Jacob did. "Where's Dad?"

"John had to work today sweetheart. But he'll be home by six thirty and he says he loves you and wishes he was here to pick you up." Aunt Emily told me, lifting me off the ground.

Jacob looked at me, all seriousness wiped away from his face. He was grinning and I just knew he was going to insult me somehow. "How tall are you, Claire?"

Oh yay, the short jokes are starting early. "Frmhykf." I mumbled, looking away from his massive frame.

He was amused. "What was that Claire? I didn't hear you."

I crossed my arms over my chest. "I said four eleven! God Jacob, why? So you can make fun of how much taller you are than me at your nice 6'7 frame there? Why do you have to be such an insensitive asshole?" I buried my hands in my face and turned around, smirking.

I heard Uncle Sam whisper to him, "Maybe you shouldn't joke with her like that. Quil will be especially pissed that you made her cry." My ears and my heart picked up at Quil's name.

Someone, most likely Jacob, placed a burning hand on my back. I pretended to sob. "Claire? Oh damn, Claire-Bear stop crying okay? I'm sorry that I hurt your feelings. Oh he's going to be so mad at me. Claire, please! I'm going to get my ass beat." I did one more fake sniff and turned to face him, raising my eyebrows and smirking.

"Idiot. Like I said, haven't changed a bit." I grinned at his disbelief at my wonderful acting skills.

He shook his head and murmured to Sam. "I think I miss little girl Claire." I grinned cheekily at him and thrust my suitcases at him.

"Can we leave?" I whined. "I'm tired."

And then Jacob was the one grinning. "There she is! Little Claire!" I sighed, remembering one of my earlier questions.

"Sam, Jacob?" They both looked at me. "Why do you… Look the same? I was four last time I saw you and you haven't changed at all." Then I looked at Aunt Emily. "Look at Emily, she's aged. But you guys haven't."

Sam scratched the back of his neck. "I guess Quileute genes really are as good as everyone says." And then almost so easily and swiftly, he changed the subject and I almost didn't even realise. Clever, Uncle Sam, real clever. "So you said you're tired? Well, it is a two hour drive depending on traffic back up to La Push so you can take a nap on the way home. Let's go, everyone."

"I gotta run to the bathroom." Jacob announced, scowling again like he smelt something bad. "I'll be right back okay? Meet you at the truck." And he turned around and dashed so fast. Maybe he was like about to pee his pants.

I glanced back at him. "Jacob!" I called after him, but he didn't even look back and Sam grabbed my wrist and dragged me away. Everything was easily thrown into the trunk and I was seated in the back of a four wheel drive truck. It was raining, pouring actually as I watched Jacob run faster than I thought possible to the truck five minutes later. He climbed into the back of the truck with me, almost hitting his head. Sam and Emily grinned at him from the front seat.

"So, Jacob," Sam asked, almost casually. "Did anything interesting happen while you were in the bathroom?"

Like what? I thought sarcastically. An angry squirrel climbed out of the urinal and attacked his…? I started laughing inappropriately as everyone stared at me. "Sorry." I muttered cutting of my laughter and looking down at the seat. "Rabid, hungry squirrels appeared without warning in my mind." Then I looked at Jacob and cracked up again. "What were you going to say Jacob?"

He looked at Sam with meaning in his eyes. "Oh nothing, I saw something I thought I knew but then I couldn't find them. They must have left."

Just then, my phone beeped with a text message. I pulled it out and frowned, not recognizing the number.

_You don't seem like a La Push kind of girl._

I dropped my phone back into my pocket without responding and stared out the window with sheer panic in my eyes. It had to be the man from the plane. How did he get my number? I tapped my fingers on the side of the door and hummed anxiously. "Claire? Are you okay?" Sam was staring at me with his eyes strayed away from the road. My fingers trembled, should I tell them? Luckily, my decision was decided for me because they noticed something to distract them.

"What's that around your neck?" Jacob asked me. I looked down and blushed red like a fire truck.

I played coy. "A necklace?" But he reached out and took it off my neck before me or him could even blink. I saw his eyes go wide.

"You still have this?" He asked me and I looked away as fast as possible. "Do you even remember him?"

At that moment, I wish we had stuck to the original topic. I felt more comfortable discussing my red eyed possible stalker than a necklace from a guy who probably doesn't even know who I am. "Yes," I muttered defensively, "Sort of." I grabbed the necklace back and fingered the back of it absently, mostly tracing over Quil's name.

The car was silent and my phone buzzed out loud. I tried to ignore it, but it kept ringing. "Yo, Claire, aren't you going to answer that?" Jacob asked.

"No?" I answered shakily. It stopped buzzing and rang again. Faster than he had before, my phone was in his hands and up to his ear.

I covered my eyes. "Hello?" He spoke into the phone, all Jacoby like. Then he turned to me, face scrunched up almost angrily. "For you."

I took a shaky, uneven breath. My heart was beating fast and Jacob was staring at me, almost like he could hear it. "Hello?" I murmured.

"Claire?"

I nearly screamed. "_Mom!"_ My heartbeat slowed and I evened out my breathing. "Hey." I replied casually.

"Hey baby, how are you? Are you being good?"

I burst out laughing. "I haven't even been here for that long Ma. I miss you a lot, how's Brian and the baby?" Good, fine and great were her answers for most of my questions. I leant back in my seat and chatted happily with her. "Kay Mom? You're going to talk my ear off so I'll call you tomorrow morning. Yes, I promise. I love you too, bye."

"Who did you think that was going to be?" Sam asked me. Shit, he noticed.

"No one." And the rest of the ride home was silent. Especially because I had gotten another phone call and set my phone on silent without anyone noticing. I think.

When we got back to my dad's house, Sam and Emily helped me unload everything into my new room while Jacob said he had to go see Nessie. He said he'd bring her to meet me tomorrow when everyone else was going to come. After we were done, I huffed down on the couch with Sam while Aunt Emily insisted on making us breakfast. "So Sam," I made small talk, "Or Uncle Sam, if you may?"

"Sam. Please, call me Sam. Uncle makes me seem so old." He grimaced and I laughed.

"But you are old. Aren't you like 35?" I asked, laughing.

He shook his head. "Good calculations." And his nose wrinkled again as I accidentally swung my hair towards him when I laughed. Did I really smell that bad?

I decided to elaborate on my stalker. "Hey, is there anyone from around here named Alan?"

"No, what does he look like?"

"Wow, you couldn't miss this kid. He was extraordinarily beautiful, with cold pale skin. And his eyes Sam, oh my…" I shivered. "They were red. I don't understand, how does somebody have red eyes?"

He stiffened, as if everything made sense to him in that very moment. "Was he on the plane with you?"

"Yeah… Sam, do you know something that I don't? Because he's really scaring me, I don't even know how he got my number…" And I snapped my mouth shut as he turned to look at me.

"Had he been contacting you? Is that why you were so nervous on the phone? Claire, you need to tell me these things!" He was exploding and Aunt Emily watched carefully from the archway of the kitchen.

I ducked my head down. "I'm sorry Sam." Five minutes passed in silence as we all sat at my dad's kitchen table, eating our scrambled eggs and toast. Well Sam scarfed his down, Emily ate hers with class and I just forked mine around and stuff random pieces in my mouth to make it look like I was eating. My toast was cut up into itty bitty pieces. The only thing I actually wanted was the glass of orange juice that came with it.

"Eat please Claire." Aunt Emily chided me.

I groaned and pushed more of it around on my plate, offered it to Sam and stood up. "I'm not hungry, just tired. I'm going to take a nap." And I went into the spare bedroom again, instead of sleeping I looked around. The bed was a queen sized double with plain black frame and white sheets and pillows. The walls were white. The borderline was white. There was a plain, wooden desk in the corner with a lamp, a bookshelf and a chair. I curled up on top of the white comforter. It was so plain! I hated it, it reminded me of well… me.

That's pretty sad. The next thing I knew, I was drifting off into lala land. I was dreaming of Quil, his beautiful face haunting my pleasant dreams. Well, they were only pleasant because he was in them. "Claire." He whispered, his voice was almost like a song. "I love you Claire, I have something to tell you. I'm a-"

_What?_ But he never answered, he slowly faded away.

"Claire?" Someone murmured to me.

I groaned, kicked and rolled over. "Go 'way." I mumbled.

They laughed. "Claire, it's three in the afternoon." Covers were gone. Cold, was the only thing my head registered. I shivered and fingered around for the comforter. "No, silly Claire-Bear. No covers for sleepy children until they wake up." No! I hated it when people interrupted my sleep. "I brought Nessie?"

I shot out of bed and stumbled onto my butt. "You said you weren't bringing her till tomorrow! I didn't even know she knew I was here."

"I lied?" He said, laughing at me. "I had to tell her, she is my girlfriend, after all. I tell her everything."

"Really, girlfriend…? You're 32, right? Then Nessie would be 17 just like me. You practically raised her, I have pictures." I murmured.

He grinned sheepishly. "It's funny how things work out, huh? Yeah, well she's downstairs so I'm going to go join her and when you untangle yourself from those sheets, you can come too." He dashed out of the room while I stared after him.

I eventually grumbled my way down the stairs to the kitchen. "I'm up now Jacob." The girl sitting on top of the kitchen counter talking to him glanced my way and hopped off and came over.

Actually, it was more like she glided over and attacked me into a hug. Wow, she wasn't as warm as Jake but she was still as hell toasty. "Hi Claire! I'm Nessie, remember me? Oh look at you!" She squealed. "You are so gorgeous!" I gawked at her. Standing next to her, I felt ugly. She had the most unique shade of bronze hair, perfect ringlets down to the middle of her back and chocolate brown eyes. Her skin was pale, but not unhealthy. She was the most beautiful creature I had ever seen on this Earth.

I frowned, and tucked a piece of unbrushed hair behind my ear. I was anything but beautiful, especially in her eyes. "Thanks. Yeah Nessie, I remember you." My cheeks darkened and I whispered it almost shyly.

"Are you sure you didn't pick up the wrong girl at the airport, Jacob?" Nessie teased him. "This can't be the bossy, controlling four year old that I remember." She handed me a plate with a sandwich and glass of juice and smiled. What was it with everyone making me food? But I was starving, so I ate happily this time, guzzling the juice down my dry throat.

And as we sat on the couch watching a cheesy movie, ten minutes later, I was silently reflected on my list of people to see. Nessie, Jacob, Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam were a check. Dad was still on that list, but he'd be home in a little under three hours. But there was one more person.

Ah, Quil. I now had a name to match the familiar face. Just thinking of his beautiful skin and mesmerising eyes made my heart stutter. "Hey Jake, Nessie?"

"Hm?" Jacob murmured. Nessie had her head against his shoulder and she looked like she was about to doze off.

"When can I see him?" I whispered.

And like magic, everyone noticed plain, invisible Claire sitting vulnerably off on the side trying not to look anyone in the eye. "Your dad will be back by dinner, Claire." Jacob told me.

"No." I told him firmly. "Quil." I said his name almost cautiously, testing my boundaries of being able to talk about the mystery man in my dreams out loud. "When am I allowed to see him?" I noticed I had my hand trailing the necklace sitting on my collarbone.

They both had matching grins on their faces. "Tonight, hopefully you can see him tonight."

And Jake, that asshole, had to have the last word. "But if you are, do everyone a favour? Take a shower."

**A/N: Any reviews with more then I love it, update soon or good chapter will receive a sneak peek of the next chapter (Preferably Quil's arrival (;)**


	4. Harsh Reality

**A/N: Hey, hey everyone! Listen, it's three in the morning here and I'm dead tired but I decided to finish up this chapter so I could post it before I slept. Sorry it's not my best and it's not very long. I hadn't written it in my usual time but I'd been busy. Please forgive me guys!**

5:50.

I tapped my fingers anxiously on the table, glancing at the clock. It seemed to drag on and on, slower the more excited I got. The tap dripped loudly from the sink on my left, slowing the time even more. I counted each drip. When I got up to ten, I looked up at the clock. 5:51.

Are you serious? I buried my head in my arms and rested them on the table. I was patiently waiting for my dad to come home. Well, as patient as I could. I hadn't seen him in six years so yeah I was a little bit excited. I wonder if he looked the same, or different. Would he cry, like I probably would or would he try to be a man? I wonder if his hair is still long, and if he still wears it in that ponytail.

I wonder if… If he'd found someone. The very thought made me cringe and start inspecting the room. It didn't look like a woman lived here. The garbage was overflowing, the dishes weren't done and the place was pretty unorganized. Satisfied with my answer, I looked up just to watch the clock slowly flick to 5:53.

Angrily, I chucked a metal spoon at the door just as it swung open to reveal Uncle Sam. It flew narrowly to the side of him and he ducked.

"Sorry." I ducked my head in shame.

He laughed and took a seat at the table with me. "Someone's a little impatient." I flashed him a look and he raised his eyebrows. "Okay, a lot impatient."

"That is the understatement of the millennium." I mumbled. "I'm so bored! I want to see Dad, I want to see Quil! I want to go to bed and-" I rambled on and on. I perked my ears up as I heard a faint buzzing noise. I realised, after Sam lifted a phone out of his pocket, that someone was calling him.

And then, ever so rudely, he held up a finger to me and walked out of the room. "You know, that's kind of rude." I mumble, and I swear to God, I heard him snicker at me from outside. I watched the clock tick to 5:57 and I groaned out loud. I crossed my legs at the ankles and tapped my feet on the floor as Sam came back in and handed me his phone. Cautiously, I held the phone up to my ear. "Hi?"

"Hey baby!" It was Dad. "Listen, I'm not coming home. Instead, I'm going to meet you at Emily and Sam's okay? Be a good girl and listen to him, he's going to drive you over. Don't cause any trouble Claire-Bear."

I scoffed, avoiding Sam's gaze. "Me, trouble? I'm like a little angel without wings. And yes, I will listen to Sam. See you soon!" I shoved the phone back into my uncle's hand and smiled. "Now Sam, please take me back to your house before I go insane!"

He nodded and grabbed the car keys off the counter before he turned back to me, leaned in as if to speak but then stopped. His nose wrinkled up and his eyes narrowed in thought. "First, go shower. All of my friends will be there and you want to look nice, especially for Quil, right?" My thoughts drifted back to what Jacob had said to me earlier.

But if you are, do everyone a favour? Take a shower. I didn't know what that meant. I thought he was just teasing me. But if Jacob and Sam thought I smelt bad, who is to say Quil didn't either? So I nodded and ran upstairs, throwing myself in the shower. I think I had managed to wash my hair and literally scrub every part of my body that I could think of in record time. I got out of the shower before the clock had time to switch over to 6:05. Of course, I had to switch my outfit too because I didn't want to take any chances of smelling bad.

And I wanted to make a good impression. So I went a little… Overboard. Purple skinnies with black suspenders over a tucked in white tee with every colour you could think of splattered on it. I threw on black ankle boots with fringes on the side, blue and black jelly bracelets, a pink beaded necklace and red hoops in my ears. Then I put on pink gloss, mascara, threw my wet hair in a ponytail and grabbed my leather jacket. "Alright, Unc, I'm all ready to go." And even though there was no sun, I grabbed my bright yellow glasses from the counter and threw them on to complete the look.

"Do you always dress this colourful?" Sam asked, seemingly searching for the right word to use. I giggled a bit.

"What can I say? It's good to be noticed." To prove my point, I twirled around in a pirouette, grabbed my iPod and dashed out the door with Sam on my heels. Luckily, no one locked their doors in La Push so I didn't even have to worry about finding a house key. I sat in the passenger's seat of Sam's old black truck with my iPod blasting. The ride to his house was super short, seeing as if La Push was the size of a McDonalds back in California. "Is there going to be food? I'm starving."

"Believe me." He chuckled. "There is always food with Emily around."

Hm… "Good to know." I mumbled, climbing out of the chipped truck. With trembling legs, I let Sam lead me up the stairs with his hand on my lower back. And inside, was chaos. There were people running around everywhere. Kids bickering over toys, babies crying, a bunch of tall people wrestling, woman in the corner gossiping. I didn't know if I'd ever find my dad. But as I ducked into the kitchen, there he was standing across the threshold with that same ponytail. Only this time… "Dad," I chuckled. "A moustache, really?"

I noticed how the whole house got deadly silent as my dad's head whipped around and locked eyes with mine. "Claire?"

"Daddy!" I cried, tossing myself through the crowd of people in my way and hurling myself into his arms. He lifted me from the ground and spun me around as my hands tightened around his neck. I was laughing, my head thrown back with sweet freedom. "I'm going to make you shave that caterpillar off. And don't you ever cut your hair? It's longer than mine is!"

He set me on my feet and eyed me up and down. "Oh baby, you always had the weirdest taste in clothes. Look at you!" He pulled me into his arms and twirled me around again. "Everyone is dying to see you again !"

I ducked my head. "Everyone?" I looked around and realised everyone was staring at me with wide eyes. Cue blush now. "Oh. Well I'm sort of embarrassed now." Reverting back to my shy self, I grabbed my dad's arm and half hid behind him. He chuckled and shook his head, pulling me with him towards the living room. I suddenly felt very overdressed and bright because mostly everyone here was in jeans and a t shirt, or no shirt at all. "Okay Claire-Bear, let's see. This is Jared, his wife Kim and their son Tanner." The woman was very pretty, with high cheekbones, soft black hair and a pregnant stomach. Jared was tall, like everyone else. But the way he looked at Kim floored me and I had to look away. His whole face was lit up like a Christmas tree.

It reminded me so much of the way Sam looked at Emily. I have no doubt that if someone was to barge in here and start firing bullets, they'd jump right in front of them. And then, the front door slammed opened and I automatically ducked and screamed. A few inhuman growls were echoed around the room, some people jumping up. My dad glanced at me anxiously. "What is it Claire? Are you hurt?"

Then I was embarrassed, because two large men came walking into the room, hands completely empty. They didn't have loaded guns or rifles. As relieved as I was, I was also humiliated. "Sorry. I'm just a little paranoid." I pointed to one of the newer men. "You guys scared me!"

"Squirt?" One of them murmured. "No f- effing way, Claire!" I was crushed into a huge bear hug and spun around, quickly passed on to the other man. He kissed me on the forehead.

I squinted at their faces. "Embry?" I asked, cocking my head. "Hey, I remember you!"

He shook his head. "Unbelievable. I cannot believe Sam managed to keep this from us! I have to go right now, I'll be back." He turned and ran back out. I stared after him in shock until the second man reached out a hand.

"Seth Clearwater. I'm your… Aunt Emily's second cousin." Then he laughed and I joined him because we both had no idea what that made us. "It's nice to see you again Claire. You've been away for too long. We all missed you." I also met Paul, his wife Rachel, who was also Jacob's sister and their 6 month old daughter Harlow, five year old daughter Kylie and three year old daughter Bryn. They jokingly told me the next one was hopefully going to be a boy. I smiled politely and moved on. He introduced me to his best friends, Collin and Brady and his mom, Sue, her husband Charlie who was also Nessie's grandfather and his sister Leah.

I stopped there, because I took a huge hit to my ego when I looked at her. Ouch, two bruises in one day. She was exotic and gorgeous. I liked her a lot, although from what I heard about her from Jacob, she wasn't very nice.

Then, I met my four cousins. Dude, I didn't even know I had one cousin. There were the ten year old twins Dakota and Kayla, six year old Joshua and three year old Carson who I quickly found out was always attached to Emily's hip. I was a little bit overwhelmed with all the people around, my head was practically spinning.

Seth smiled at me. "You can meet my wife later, she's working tonight. But you arrived on a good day because we're having a pack barbeque."

I had met everyone, except the one person I wanted to. So I tiptoed up and whispered in Seth's ear. "Does Quil ever come to these things? When can I meet him?"

"He doesn't usually come." A flood of unwelcome disappointment flooded through me. Without thinking, my hand flew to my necklace and I grasped it. Obviously, Seth recognized it because he winked at me and I flushed bright red. "But I have a strong feeling Embry went to go get him. He wouldn't want to miss you." I smiled, so he did remember me. And he wanted to see me? At least I'm not the only one whose crazy obsessed with someone I barely know.

So I sat down on the couch awkwardly, wishing Aunt Emily and Uncle Sam didn't have so many people to entertain or children to take care of or that Nessie and Jake were here so I knew someone who would actually talk to me. Dad sat with me but you can only talk to your parent so much before you get bored or irritated. Then, I heard his voice. "Dude, I don't want to be here. What's so important that you dragged me all the way over?"

I gasped lowly and stood up as he walked into the room, a smug Embry standing by his side. I couldn't even believe it. His hair was the same, his eyes, his skin. The way he stood, walked, blinked, everything about him was just as I remembered. I didn't think anyone who was real could be so perfect and yet, here he was. His eyes caught mine and I stopped breathing. "Claire?" He murmured, astonished. I was stiff, frozen in place. I couldn't believe that the person who I thought was a figment of my imagination all my life was standing in front of me.

"You are real, aren't you?" I murmured. I reached out hesitantly and lifted my hand to touch his burning hot cheek. His eyes closed in contentment and I smiled. "Quil. Hi."

He opened his eyes and gave me a toothy grin. "Hey." I couldn't stand it, I felt like a magnet and before I knew it, I had jumped into his arms and buried my face into his neck. My legs wrapped around his waist and he spun me around much like my dad had, only I held on tighter, not as willing to let go.

"This is so unreal." I murmured once he did set me on my feet. I twirled around the pendant in my fingers and smiled. As soon as I did that, he let out the biggest exhale I'd ever heard and grabbed the tiny carved wolf in between his fingers. His hand began to shake, almost tremble.

Unfortunately, I felt scared for my life and almost stepped back. In a movement so fast that if I had even blinked, I wouldn't have seen it, he tore the thick black chain from my neck. It fell to the ground as he turned and ran out the door, shaking like a leaf. You could hear an ant sneeze in the silence around me. Tears filled my eyes as I crumpled to the ground, grabbing the cherished carved wolf in my fingers delicately. My stomach tightened with nauseous convulsions as I clutched the wolf to my heart as it crumbled silently inside my chest.

The man of my dreams, literally, the seemingly imaginary person who I had fallen in love with over the many years had been right before my fingertips. I tried desperately to put the chain back together but it was shredded. Just like our bond, snapped and broken. I didn't know why I had thought this moment would be something perfect, out of a fairy tale. You know, when the two lovers meet and automatically fall deeply in love when they lock eyes.

Then, I realised with a bitter laugh that I was nothing to him. Even if I remember him from all those years, even if he remembered me, it was pure desperation. I was a girl he hadn't seen in years and he was someone I believed to be imaginary for almost my whole, short life. He shouldn't even matter to me. But he did, I didn't know why but the look he gave me was enough to bring me to my knees in emotional pain. I barely knew him and yet, it was almost as if he was a part of my soul. Him running away shouldn't matter this much, a broken necklace shouldn't be that big of a deal. But it was. I didn't really want to sit here under everyone's eyes while I tried to figure it out either, the only thing I wanted to do now was go home.

I got my wish. My dad excused himself from the barbeque and gently lifted me off the ground, leading me out the door to his car as everyone watched as if they knew why a girl, who barely knew someone, was acting like her whole world was ripped out of her hands. I tied a knot around the loose ends of the string, hoping it would hold it together when I slipped it back around my neck.

I hoped that small knot was enough to hold together my broken heart while it crumbled.

**A/N: Sorry that was sort of depressing. And I know their bond is really strong right now, but I decided to make imprinting sort of desperate. Because that's how I think Stephenie Meyer portrayed it in her series. So please no flames on that!**

**By the way, I'm looking for a BETA! So if you know one, or if you are one and you're interested, let me know! I need someone who can be there when I'm done my chapters and stuff so if that's you, great! P.S, sorry if there's mistakes.**


	5. Upside Down

I couldn't fall asleep. It was three in the morning, and I was lying in this unfamiliar room, staring at the ceiling, my brain running a mile a minute.

I couldn't keep up with my emotions. I felt heartbroken, for reasons that I couldn't understand. I was angry too. Who did this Quil think he is? Getting close to me and then just breaking my necklace! I mean, okay, he made it for me but whatever, that doesn't give him permission to break it! _Ugh!_ I rolled over and pressed my face into my pillow. This is so frustrating!

Lastly, I was overwhelmed. Maybe if I hadn't been away for so long I wouldn't feel like this, but there were just so many people to re-meet and remember and I just couldn't pinpoint what was so threatening that my mom had to run us out of town. I would have to ask someone, Dad or Sam most likely, but I put that in the back of my mind for later, when I was settled in.

Eventually, I must have drifted off, because I dreamed about the strange man I met on the plane, Alan, standing over me in my bedroom and telling me how mouthwatering I smelt, saying something about singers. I flew up with a start, my heart beating out of my chest and glanced around. The dream felt surprisingly real..

But there was no sight of him, so it had to have been a dream. Falling back on the pillow, I felt a cold chill and vaguely wondered to myself if I had went to sleep with the window open, before falling into a black state of mind.

* * *

I heard noises coming from downstairs, and the pounding headache that I had told me that it was way too early for me to be awake, considering the lack of sleep that I got last night. Checking my alarm clock and seeing it flash 8:06am, I knew I was right. I was warm, the window was closed and I did not want to get up. I rolled over, sunk back into my pillow and closed my eyes.

Two seconds later, in a bleary haze, someone burst through my bedroom door, nearly knocking it off its hinges. I shot up and murmured, "Quil?"

He looked at me, body slightly quivering, eyes staring straight at me, like they were going to make my brain explode. "What were you doing last night, Claire?" He asked in a hard, seemingly controlled voice. He looked like he wanted to break something.

I rubbed my eyes, too tired for games. "What are you talking about? I was in here, sleeping." He marched over, grabbed my face with both of his hands intently, and pressed his face into the top of my head. At first, it felt like he was kissing me, but then I realized he was inhaling.

He started coughing. "Fuck, Claire. You stink."

More embarrassed than I should be, I buried my face in my hands. "Well maybe if you had barged into my room at a slightly more appropriate hour, I would have showered."

Quil growled at me. Wait, what? "That's not what I meant Claire! You smell sweet! Fuck, your whole room smells so goddamn sickly _sweet!_"

"You're freaking me out, Quil." I whispered, scared that if I talked too loud, he would raise his voice even more. His eyes softened. Sheesh, he was bipolar.

He seemed conflicted about something, and he forced a change of subject. "It's been a rough couple of years for me, Claire. I'm just not used to all of this." He offered me his hand. "Let's go downstairs and get something to eat." A rare smile crossed his lips, and even though it was hard and fake, I would take it. Also, I would not pry further about his recent outburst and I would not be rude and kick him out so I could go back to sleep, I would just have to take a nap later.

After sliding out of the blanket, I finally realized that I was only wearing a camisole and a pair of lacy underwear. Quil's eyes darkened. "Um…" I blushed. "Let me get dressed."

"Okay," he whispered huskily. As soon as he shut the door, I jumped back onto my bed and screamed into my pillows. _Oh my God, how mortifying! He has to be like over thirty and he just saw me in my underwear! _

As quick as I could, so it didn't make it seem like I was freaking out about it, I unflustered myself and threw on a pair of denim capris and a pink V-neck shirt. My hair, ringlets all frizzled and sticking up, went up in a bun and I brushed my teeth in the bathroom and threw on deodorant. After a careful debate, I avoided putting on any perfume because I didn't want to smell so sweet that it burned Quil's nose again.

Too tired for makeup, I went downstairs rubbing my tired eyes to a massive stack of pancakes drizzled in syrup. Quil smiled his tiny smile at me again. "Emily made them. I thought I'd bring them over because neither your dad nor I can cook to save our lives." Dad, who was dressed in a simple white shirt and tie, kissed me on the head and gave Quil a meaningful stare that was lost to me before wishing his goodbyes and leaving for work.

And it was just Quil and I now. I sat down hesitantly at the table, unsure of what I should do. "Eat, Claire. Go ahead, I already ate."

I took a bite. "Did you put the syrup on yourself?" He nodded, clearly pleased that he did something for me. "Did you ever think that I don't like syrup on my pancakes?" I asked with a mouthful of food. Quil's eyes went wide with regret and I let myself smile. "I'm just teasing you, because you need to lighten up a little bit."

We both laughed and relaxed a little bit, until he sat down across from me and I remembered all my conflicted emotions from last night. I played with my food, trying to avoid his eyes, and he cleared his throat. "I came over, because I wanted to ask you something. Or apologize, or something. Last night, I was… overwhelmed. Claire, I have to tell you, I'm not right in my head. Or at least, I haven't been. But seeing you again, it brings back a lot of emotions, a lot of memories that used to cause me a lot of pain."

"Memories that involve me?" I whispered.

"Yes, Claire. I know that this is confusing and overwhelming for you, if you have any questions you can ask me."

"Why did my mom take me away..?" I whispered.

He stiffened. I guess I should have tread lighter grounds first, but I want to know. "There are some things, Claire, things that you don't know. I want to tell you… But just not yet okay? But your mom, she did not like them, she did not like them one bit. God, you were just a kid, you didn't understand. It wasn't even like that, it wasn't my fault." His voice was getting lower and he was talking less to me and more to himself. "Thirteen damn years I've been waiting for this."

I stared at him and he looked up at me and when our eyes locked, I felt a chill run through my spine. "What was that?" I whispered to myself. "Did you feel that?"

He reached across the table and grabbed my hand. "Claire, this is the exact way that I have felt since you got here, that I should have been feeling my whole life. I can't explain it, but you will understand one day, I promise you that. Can you trust me, Claire?"

My stomach rolled into knots. Those damn eyes, looking at me, looking _through_ me. "I've dreamt about you, Quil. I've been having reoccurring dreams about you ever since I was a little girl. I trust you." I murmured. "I would trust you with my life."

There was nothing else to be said, in that moment. Any other words would have ruined it. So I ate in silence, aware of his eyes watching my movements. "I want to know about you, Claire." He said, and I jumped a little bit.

"What is there to know? I don't have any secrets to tell, I'm just Claire." I wasn't even half as interesting as him.

"How tall are you? What's your favourite color? Where did you go to school? Tell me about your friends back home, what are their names? How is Danni doing?" The questions shot out of his mouth and I stumbled along with him, trying to keep up.

"Four eleven, purple, Pacific Collegiate in Sana Cruz, I didn't have any and she's fine, smart as always."

"No friends?" He asked in shock. "Beautiful and funny Claire had no friends? Why?"

I shrugged. "I just wasn't interested."

"Well what did you do in your free time then?" Quil asked. I hesitated, feeling like I was boring him, but he was leaning towards me with curious eyes.

"I worked at a restaurant around the corner, I kept a 4.0 GPA and I played in a community volleyball league, as well as on the school's team."

"All these places and you didn't talk to anyone at all?"

I snorted. "I'm not a social pariah, Quil, I do talk to people. In fact, I'm told that I'm quite the lovely gal. I just didn't make any permanent friendships or extend them outside of a certain area."

"And no boyfriends, right?"

I smiled. "No boyfriends."

"Okay, well I should get going." He said and stood up from the table. My heart started beating with panic.

"Where are you going?" I asked, trying not to sound anxious.

"I have some business to take care of." He said curtly. Then he smiled, sensing my annoyance. "Patience, Claire. Trust me, remember?" He took my face in his hands again, but unlike earlier, he actually did kiss me on the head. "Be good, I'll see you later."

And then he took off out the door without another glance. "Bye." I mumbled, slightly grumpy that he woke me up at eight in the morning just to take off half an hour later, and still in shock from the small current that flew through my forehead when his lips touched it.

I dragged my groggy body into the living room and grabbed a blanket, curling up and aimlessly flicking through the channels, trying to find something to watch.

* * *

Someone's giggling.

It was a very pretty sound, like Heaven's angels singing in a chorus. Or like wind chimes. "Nessie?" I mumbled, not knowing anyone else who would be in my house that sounded like that.

"Hey Claire, did you know that you snore?" She asked me.

I opened my eyes. "I do not snore." I said indignantly. "Where's Jacob?"

"He's with Quil and the others, doing something for work." She said nonchalantly.

"Do they all work together?" I asked curiously.

I was met with a wry smile. "Something like that."

It seemed weird, seeing Nessie without Jacob attached to her side. "So what do you do when he's not around?"

"Well, sometimes I sit at home, sometimes I go and visit my Aunt and Uncle in Seattle, but most of the time I go to Emily's and hang out with the moms, which is where we are going right now!"

"Don't you have any friends your age? Well, our age?" Surely she got bored of hanging around older women.

But she just shrugged. "My parents always used to say that I was mature for my age. Don't worry though, they may have kids but they're still fun to hang out with. Besides, the guys show up sooner or later."

I was skeptical, but I slid on my shoes and followed her anyway. As far as I was concerned, it beat staying at home and mulling over Quil.

When we got there, Emily was in the kitchen making something that smelt amazing and Kim was sitting at the kitchen table, rubbing her belly and complaining loudly about pregnancy. "I mean, I barely even walk anywhere and my ankles are still double the size! I swear, if this baby comes out at ten pounds like Tanner, I may not have a vagina anymore."

"That right there is the definition of too much information." Nessie moaned, walking in and making herself right at home.

I smiled tentatively at my aunt, who turned around and grinned at me. "Come in, sweetheart. Have a seat and I'll make you some French toast."

I vaguely remembered Quil telling me that the pancakes I ate were from Emily, so I wondered to myself why she was cooking again. A plate appeared in front of me, and even though it smelt delicious, I was so full from the pancakes. I frowned down at the plate. "I'm sorry Emily, but I already ate."

The plate disappeared from underneath me and Kim started shoveling it in her mouth. "Oops, that was rude wasn't it?" She asked and started giggling. I smiled, my uneasiness slowly starting to melt away.

Before I knew it, it was almost three o'clock. The other girls, including Megan, Seth's recent bride and the sweetest girl you will ever meet had all left. I was sitting in the living room with Emily with Carson in my lap, engrossed in some cartoon that was playing on the television.

"Aunt Emily, how come it looks like nobody in this town has aged a bit since I left?" I asked her suddenly, my thoughts getting the best of me.

"A good gene pool, obviously." She said, and then laughed. "It's all part of something that you will understand soon."

"How soon is soon?"

"Whenever Quil decides he wants to tell you. This is his secret to tell, not anyone else's. So don't go pestering others for information. Patience is a virtue." Annoyed, and slightly scolded, I turned away from her and back to my own thoughts.

A secret that involves Quil, explains why my mother took me away and why she's afraid of them. A secret that explains my pull and attraction to Quil and why he looks like he's 19 years old instead of 30. And apparently, everyone knew about this secret except me.

It was late now, past the time that my dad would have been off work and Quil and the others still hadn't shown up, so I decided to go home. Upon my arrival, I found my dad had ordered a pizza and we ate dinner in front of the TV happily.

All too soon, the effects of a restless night hit me, and I regretfully turned in early, curling up under my sheets and wondering why Quil hadn't shown up again like he promised. I didn't have long to mull over it though, before I was taken under by sleep.

But a loud knocking at my window, seemingly seconds after I had fallen asleep, awoke me. It was quarter past two in the morning and in the dim moonlight, I could see Quil's face peering in. I opened it, wondering to myself if I would ever get a full night's sleep in La Push.

The sight of him was not unwelcoming though, even though I was worried about how he had gotten up to my second story window, but I let him through without a word. I smiled at him, but his eyes are stony.

I let my hand come out to touch his cheek. "Quil, what's wrong?" I whispered gently.

"Claire, you have to promise me that you will not go outside after dark without me." He said, pained.

"Why? What's going on?"

"Promise me." He spat through clenched teeth.

"I promise." I whispered.

He opened his eyes and pressed his forehead against mine. "Right now, you need to be very careful. Don't go into the woods, even during the day. Do not talk to strangers. I can't lose you again, Claire. Keep yourself safe for me."

His haunted eyes searched mine for conformation and I bit my lip, curiosity overwhelming me, but not daring to ask. He groaned lowly, mumbling, "Don't bite your lip like that." And then, so quickly I barely saw it coming, he pressed his lips into mine. I opened my mouth, letting his tongue snake between them and all too quickly, he let go, gently capturing my bottom lip at the end. "Fuck. Damn it, that was too soon. I'm so sorry Claire."

He dropped my face and backed up towards the window, looking bewildered. He was gone before I could get my brain into check.

I followed him to the window and shut it, not a glimpse of him underneath it.

"I'm not sorry." I whispered out into the night.

**A/N:** **OH MY GOODNESS! I cant believe it has been two years, almost three years. It did not seem like it at ALL. I am so, so, so, so, so, so sorry. If you're still reading this, I really hope that you keep on reading it because I promise that I will continue writing from now on! **


	6. Something Missing

I didn't see Quil for two weeks.

I mean, I caught glimpses of him at Emily's or I heard his voice from far away, but the minute he noticed me, he was gone. It was like he always knew my presence, before he even saw me. He was avoiding me.

I knew it; he's freaked out because I'm so young. It's not like I _asked _him to kiss me, jeez!

Nobody wanted to be around me, I was moody and sulky. I couldn't even be happy around my dad, who was the only person who consistently kept up an effort to talk to me.

I wasn't mad, per say, I was annoyed. I was annoyed that Quil had this kind of effect on me. I mean, sure, we were close when I was a kid, and I had dreams about him for the rest of my life but I've only really known the guy for less than a month! But the way his mouth felt on mine, that electric shock that shook my whole body…

_No, stop it!_ I chided myself. I had woken up this morning with the vow that I was going to do what Quil was doing, I was going to go on like his avoidance of me did not bother me one bit, and I was going to get on with my life. This is why I was in the passenger seat of Nessie's car, staring out the window while I listened to her drone on about something, which most likely had something to do with Jacob, as she drove at record breaking speeds.

"You'll love Alice; she's really fun and bubbly. Her husband is a bit on the shy side, but once he gets used to having you around, he'll warm up. And they both look a bit young, so don't be shocked if they don't look like an Aunt or Uncle- Claire! Are you even listening to me?"

I was, kind of. But when she said my name, it made me realize how often Quil says it when he's speaking to me. In fact, he uses it in almost every sentence that he says to me. I made a mental note to ask him about it, but then I remembered that he wasn't speaking to me.

There goes my promise to myself. I closed my eyes and sighed, facing the reality that I would never be able to stop thinking about him. "He'll get over it, Claire." Nessie whispered to me suddenly, like she could read my mind. "He's been away from you for thirteen years, he won't last much longer."

"Why does he care so much about me?" I asked. "Why does he remember me, after so long, even though I left when I was only four? I couldn't have made that big of an impact on him, like I said, I was only four!" I know Emily told me not to pry, but honestly, I couldn't stop myself. In the past two weeks, I have felt uncomfortable around everyone. It always feels like I'm missing something, something huge. Quil promised he would tell me, but because he isn't speaking to me, I figured I would try another source.

"You made a bigger impact on his life than you could know." She told me solemnly. "Which is why, I know for a fact that he will be running back to you soon."

I sighed. "Soon is not a figure of time. When is soon? I hate feeling so left out of everything that's going on, I need to know! And because no one will tell me, I have to wait for that son of a bitch to get over himself!"

Nessie giggled at me swearing. "Well Jake and I have a bet. He says this weekend. I say you'll find him at your window tonight."

"Well this time I'll make sure I'm dressed appropriately." I mumbled to myself and she giggled again.

"Jake told me that Quil saw you in your underwear. I think he was more embarrassed than you were, Claire."

"Argh! Why is he telling people!" I moaned and she broke into another fit of laughter.

The rest of the drive was relatively quiet, just meager chatting and no more discussions about me in my underwear, thankfully. We pulled into the crowded mall parking lot and met up at the front doors with two of the most beautiful, yet scary looking people I've ever seen, other than the man on the plane. Nessie reached out and hugged them, the short woman first and then the tall man, briefer but still as warm.

"Hi, Nessie!" The little one gushed. She was the same height as me, which was extremely rare. "I'm so glad you decided to take the trip down to see us, it's been so long. I know you're busy with Jacob and everything but you could at least come see your family more often!"

Nessie smiled fondly at her. "Sorry Aunt Alice. I promise I'll come around more, as long as Claire promises that she'll join me. The ride can get awfully lonely." This time she turned to smile at me, and even in my mood, it was contagious. "This is my Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper. Guys, this is Claire. She's Emily's niece and John's daughter, if you don't remember. She's just moved back."

The man, Jasper, waved and tipped his lips up in a brief but genuine smile and Alice came forward and squeezed me until I couldn't breathe. Wow, she was hard as a rock and her skin was ice cold. She didn't look sick or anything…"It's so nice to see you again, Claire. I knew you when you were just a little girl, although I'm sure you have no idea who I am."

"Are you sure you're Nessie's aunt? I mean, you both look so young…" I trailed off. "What is it with the people around here not aging?"

Alice threw Nessie a look, so quickly that I almost didn't catch it and she gave an almost imperceptible shake of her head. Inside, I sighed, knowing that it had something to do with the big "secret," but I kept a blank look on my face. Alice smiled brightly at me. "I guess we're just lucky. Or maybe, it's something in the water. You better start drinking it, Claire, or you're going to look too old to hang out with us." She threw me a wink.

We started walking, and I listened quietly to Nessie and Alice catching up. Jasper, of course, was silently observing like I was, an affectionate smile on his face. "So how are Mom and Dad?" Nessie asked.

"You know Edward and Bella, they're off doing what they do best, being boring. Your dad has opened up his own bookstore and your mother has decided she wants to go back to school and take some lame courses in British Literature." Alice rolled her eyes.

"Auntie Rose and Uncle Em? I talked to Rose on the phone yesterday, but just briefly."

"They're on a second honeymoon in Vegas. Emmett wanted to try his luck at the slots." The two of them giggled together, Alice's laugh was just as mesmerizing as Nessie's. "And before you can ask, Carlisle and Esme are doing fine. They have a permanent residence in Alaska for the time being, Carlisle working at the hospital and Esme's teaching kindergarten."

I could see the sadness in Nessie's eyes. "I miss them all, Mom and Dad especially. It's so weird, everyone being spread out. It's lonely."

"They'll come back, Ness. They always do." Alice placed a hand on her shoulder and smiled. "Enough with the heavy, we need to focus on the task at hand. You need new clothes, Claire."

I blinked. "What's wrong with my clothes?"

"Well for one, they are all fit for California living. Trust me, Claire; you have to wear jeans here, even in the summer. And you need a proper pair of shoes and hiking boots and you need long sleeves and sweaters."

Nessie chimed in. "And you still dress like you're four."

I glared at her. "Shut up, Nessie. I like the way I dress."

"If what Nessie says is true, then I have my work cut out for me. You are almost eighteen, Claire. You're a woman now! And you need to start dressing like one." Alice chided and grabbed my arm.

She did not let go of it for the whole trip, dragging me in and out of stores, pushing me into dressing rooms to try on clothes. By the end of the day, I was hungry and exhausted. I had at least six new pairs of jeans, a new spring jacket, three sweaters, four long sleeves and four new dresses. On top of that, I had a pair of hiking boots, two pairs of sneakers and a pair of high heeled boots, which I had to admit, were gorgeous. Alice, seeing that I was fed up, told me that I could pick out something for myself. I chose a pair of earrings, which were in the shape of a silver wolf with bright blue eyes.

At the end of the day, I opened up my wallet and tried to figure out if I had enough to pay Alice back when she and Nessie told me to put away my wallet. "It's my treat." Alice said. "Think of it as a homecoming present. Something to make you feel more comfortable here."

I had to admit, I was touched, and as we were saying our goodbyes, I held on to Alice for longer than I would have. "Don't be a stranger." She told Nessie, before glancing at me. "Or you. It's nice to see Nessie hanging out with someone her _own_ age. Be safe on the way back, and follow the speed limit this time, Nessie. You could have gotten into an accident on the way here."

Her last sentence was serious and so were her eyes. Nessie nodded mutely, hugged them both goodbye and we got into the car. "Do you want me to drive?" I mumbled to her, aware that it was a horrible idea because I was already drifting to sleep, but not wanting to be rude.

"I got it, but thanks. Go ahead and rest, we'll be there before you know it."

So I did just that. I awoke just as we were crossing over the border from Forks to La Push and the first thing Nessie said to me was, "You talk in your sleep too."

I flushed, because I remembered my dreams very vividly. They were about Quil and I, of course. "What did I say?" I asked, trying not to panic.

"You miss your mom." She murmured. "You're worried about her and the baby, but you're also happy you got away. You miss Quil, you wish he would stop being so stubborn and talk to you. Oh, and you want him to kiss you again." With that, she smiled. "So you guys kissed, huh?"

"Yup," I grumbled. "We kissed and he ran away and stopped talking to me."

"What a moron." She grumbled along with me. "Men suck."

I laughed. "Missing Jacob, are we?"

"I understand, he's busy with work but I'm really lonely without him. I'm truly glad that you're here, Claire. It's a lot easier to cope with. You're right, hanging out with Emily and them really does get boring after a while."

She turned to look at me and gave me a blinding smile at the same moment that I screamed, "Nessie, look out!"

She slammed on the brakes with inhumane reflexes just as a giant bear like wolf thing ran out in front of the car. Eyes wide and heart beating out of my chest, I turned to look at her. "Nessie, what is that?"

I could see my reflection in her eyes; I looked absolutely terrified while she looked more annoyed than anything. "Wait here." She sighed. _And then she started to get out of the car!_

"Are you insane!" I shouted after her, started to open the handle of my door when the wolf started to growl. It was looking right at me, in almost a warning to stay inside. So I did as Nessie walked over to it. I could hear her yelling.

"Get out of here! Go back into the woods! Get out, go!" She was yelling, standing way too close for comfort. "Go!" It was almost as if she knew him personally, the way she was glaring right into his big eyes.

_Those eyes…_ It glanced at me, and the eyes struck me as hauntingly familiar. In my daze, I couldn't figure it out but I watched it slowly stalk into the forest, never taking its eyes off of me. Nessie got back in the car and I turned to her, freaking out as she started driving. "What the _hell_ was that, Nessie! You could have gotten hurt! You could have been killed! That's not your everyday damn stray dog, you lunatic! That was a damn wolf!"

Nessie rolled her eyes. "Relax Claire, they're harmless. They've been living here as far as I can remember, the only thing they are is annoying."

"They don't look harmless." I muttered.

She smiled at me. "Don't worry, you'll get used to them too. In fact, they grow on you. You might start to like them."

"Yeah and Quil might start to be less of an idiot." She laughed at that.

"Then it might be sooner than you think." There was a knowing tone in her voice as she pulled up to my house to drop me off. "Bye Claire, I had a lot of fun today. Don't forget to grab your bags out of the trunk."

"Bye Ness," I murmured, curious as to where she and Jacob lived. "Maybe next time we'll hang out at your house."

She smiled. "I live just on the outskirts of Forks." Wow, this whole time I thought she lived here in La Push. "I'll see you soon."

I opened the door to a quiet house, pitch black. Dropping my bags on the floor, I switched on the light and my heart nearly leapt out my throat. "Quil, jeez don't scare me like that!" I gasped. "What are you doing here? In my house, sitting in the pitch black?"

His eyes were pained as they glanced at me. "Where have you been, Claire?"

Oh, here we go. "Really, you don't talk to me for two weeks and now I step off the premises and I get a scolding?" He was still watching me, eyes burning. My cheeks burned, he was shirtless. "I went to Seattle with Nessie and we went shopping with her aunt and uncle. What's it to you?"

"What did I tell you about going out alone?"

"I wasn't alone. I was with Nessie, Alice and Jasper! Seriously, what's your deal?"

"My deal, Claire, is that you did not tell your father or _your_ aunt and uncle where you were going. I come over here to talk to you and your clothes were all gone from your bedroom…" Wait, my clothes are gone? Damn you, Nessie. "I thought you left again. I've been looking all over for you, and when Jake said something about Nessie driving you to Seattle, I thought that you were getting on a plane."

I was still so mad at him, but something about the way he looked like he was almost in tears made my heart break. "Oh Quil…" I breathed softly, daring to sit beside him. He didn't move, so I put my hand on his arm. "I just got here, silly boy. I'm in no hurry to leave anytime soon."

I was surprised when his warm arms wrapped around me and pulled me into his chest. His face buried into my hair and he kissed me on the head. "Oh Claire, Claire, Claire."

It felt so nice, being tucked in his arms and I just melted, all of my anger dissolving. "Why have you been avoiding me?" I asked him, less angry than I wanted.

"It felt like the right thing to do, after what happened." He was talking about the kiss, of course. "That won't happen again, Claire, I promise. But I can't stay away from you anymore, it's killing me. Physically killing me."

"But… Why?" I mumbled. "Why is it me? I haven't seen you in thirteen years. I was only two when we met, so I'm told. Why am I so important to you?"

"Claire, I want to tell you. But I can't."

I put my hands on his face in encouragement. "You can tell me anything, Quil." And it was true; I don't think there was anything he could say that would scare me away.

"That is not the problem Claire, I trust you wholeheartedly. But I'm not allowed to tell you, I'm banned."

"Banned? How are you banned?" I asked curiously. What did that even mean?

He stood up abruptly, pushing me off. "Damn it Claire! That's one of the things that I'm not allowed to tell you!" He looked past the point of ripping out his hair. "It's Friday tomorrow, we're having a bonfire. You should come."

"Is Nessie going to be there?" I asked.

"No, but Jacob probably will be. But, I think it will be beneficial for you. I'll pick you up at eight, okay?" I nodded, wondering why Nessie wasn't going to be going with Jacob, but I was distracted by the fact that Quil was kissing my cheek. He looked me right in the eyes and my heart stopped. "I'm really glad that you didn't leave."

"Me too," I whispered back. I meant it with all my heart.

"And please, next time you're leaving the reservation, tell someone. Don't make me worry like that again." With that, he left.

I dragged my bags upstairs, wondering where I was going to put them in the tiny dresser that I already had filled when I remembered what Quil said. _All of your clothes were gone._ Hesitantly, I opened my dresser drawers to find that they were indeed all empty, except for my underwear drawer. Damn it, Nessie. How the hell did she manage to do that when we were together all day?

I sighed and started putting away my clothes, with memories of the wolf's eyes nagging me in the back of my head.

**A/N: Look at that, two updates only a day apart! I hope this makes up for my super long absence and I hope you can start reading it again and updating, I really miss you guys. :)**

**Anyone who reviews gets a sneak peek at the next chapter, already written and full of crucial information!  
**


	7. The Truth

**A/N: Okay guys, if you're reading this, please actually take the time to read this. I'm really worried about the fact that it took me forever to update, so i feel like no one is reading and enjoying this. If that's the case, and i don't get enough reviews to make me feel like you're still enjoying it, I will cancel it. So just keep that in mind.**

**I want to do this story, but if no one is reading i could start back up on everything else that I've been neglecting. So if you want me to continue, let me know!  
**

Why am I so damn nervous? I've already met these people; I've been hanging around with them for the past three weeks. But still, I had a nervous feeling in my stomach, like I was going to find out something bad.

No, not bad, life changing.

"Just relax, Claire." Nessie crooned from over the phone. Yes, I had resorted to calling Nessie. She still wasn't coming, claiming that her parents were coming down for a visit. I really wanted to meet them, but she said that it wasn't the time right now and that I should just go to the bonfire and enjoy my time with Quil. "You're just going to get there, hang out a little bit, eat some food and then listen to the legends. My advice is to wear something warm and ease up! Oh, and don't fall asleep during the stories, because they're important."

"Thanks, Nessie." I sighed and hung up. I threw on some dark jeans, a white t-shirt and a pink sweater. I straightened my curly hair for the first time in forever, and threw on some mascara. That was it, I didn't want to put on any lip gloss because, not being presumptuous or anything, I was hoping that I would get to kiss Quil again.

I debated on wearing my heeled boots, but I decided against it. It had rained last night and the ground was definitely still muddy, so I laced up my hiking boots and looked in the mirror. I looked nervous, so I took some deep breaths in order to make myself relax.

It was almost working, when the doorbell rang and my heart started leaping out of my chest all over again. I did the once over on myself before running downstairs, not wanting to keep Quil waiting. But my dad had already answered it, and Quil was standing in the doorway in a short sleeve shirt and jeans.

I gave him a shy wave. "Hi Quil, it's good to see you."

"Your hair looks different. I've never seen it like this before." He murmured, gently touching the ends with his fingers. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah," I turned towards my dad and kissed him on the cheek. "Bye, Dad."

"You kids have fun. And Quil?" He gave him a hard stare. "Don't bring her back late, or there will be consequences."

I tried not to giggle, because he was dead serious, but I just loved the way he sounded like such an overprotective father. "Yes sir." Quil said solemnly. "Come on, Claire." He offered me his arm and I happily took it.

He led me past the car and I looked up at him, puzzled. "Are we walking?" I asked him.

"It's just up on the cliffs, not far from here at all." He murmured, sliding his arm out of mine and taking my hand instead. His hand was so warm and so much larger than mine, it made me feel really safe and protected. "So," he started saying, "what have you been doing for the past two weeks?"

The way he talked made it sound like he felt really guilty for avoiding me, so I didn't mention it. "Well, I mostly hung out with Nessie or my dad at my place, or I went to Uncle Sam's and hung out with the women." I scowled, remembering the time Harlow had thrown up all over my lap. "Not really the best place to be, but it wasn't so bad when it was just Emily and my cousins."

"What about the other guys?" He asked me softly.

I shrugged. "Just Uncle Sam and Jacob, but only with Nessie around. The others have lives, children, jobs and all that."

"Are you lonely?"

It seemed like a really weird question, considering all the people that I've been around but I realized that when Quil wasn't around, I did feel a bit empty. "I was pretty lonely, yeah." Noticing how I said _was_, he squeezed my hand even tighter.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize, you're here now."

"Do you want to come work for me?"

Random question was my first thought. "Where exactly do you work?"

"Jake, Embry and I own a small mechanic shop on the Rez. Kim is our official office secretary, but we're usually more swamped in the summer than during other seasons, and I'm sure she could use some help. It would keep you busy, for sure." He seemed hopeful, and I realized that I could spend more time with Quil taking this job, than not taking it.

"I'd love to." I smiled up at him. "Thank you for considering me as your first choice."

"There's no one else I would rather have there." He was looking at me, smoldering his beautiful eyes. Damn it, I wanted him to kiss me. I bit my lip. _Please kiss me._

Just when I thought he was going to give in, he jerked away from my gaze and nodded towards the cliffs. "We're just about there, I can see the fire."

As we got closer, I could see a lot of people. "Who is all here?" I murmured.

"The usual boys and their respective others, sans Nessie and the children, plus Billy Black, Sue Clearwater and my grandfather." My palms got extra sweaty at the idea of meeting, or re-meeting, one of Quil's family members.

We got there last and the party was in full swing. Paul and Embry were having a "who can stuff the most hot dogs in their mouth at once" contest. I wouldn't be surprised if Paul won, considering how much he talked, but Embry seemed determined not to lose. I shook my head, especially after seeing the glint in Quil's eyes, indicating his inner desire to join them.

My aunt was leaning against Uncle Sam's legs, roasting a marshmallow over the roaring fire and seemingly enjoying the peace and quiet. Well, peace and quiet from her kids. The people here were anything but quiet.

It was a really nice, homey environment, even more so because I was still holding Quil's hand. He immediately led me over to a small cluster of people, who I recognized to be the Tribal Elders, Billy, Sue and Quil Sr.

Quil Sr. wasn't looking so good, and I could see the worry in his grandson's eyes. I was surprised that he was still standing… Well, standing being a loose term, seeing as he was sitting in a wheelchair. He had to be at least 90. Quil introduced us, and he took my hand from Quil's and held it tight. "Welcome home, Claire." He said with true warmth. "I'm so glad you came back before I left."

"Grandpa…" Quil muttered weakly.

"Oh you know I'm not going to last much longer. I'm ninety three years old, son. I'm basically a sack of bones." His grandfather was obviously just teasing, but I saw the way it affected Quil after his eyes got tight. I took my hands and rubbed his arm gently, until he slowly relaxed.

His appreciative smile shone down at me and my heart fluttered. "Let's go make our rounds." He murmured and I followed without a peep. I was happy to see Jacob, I had missed him and I gave him a tight squeeze around the waist when we made it to him.

"Hey Squirt." He rubbed my head affectionately. "Glad to see you're feeling better. Nessie says you've been a real moody bitch lately. You on your period or something?"

Leave it to Jacob to ruin my perfectly good mood. I openly flushed and Quil smacked him over the head. "Next time, just don't talk." He grumbled and Jacob laughed wholeheartedly before going off to roast a hot dog. "Are you hungry, Claire?" He asked me.

"Not for a hot dog, but I wouldn't mind roasting some marshmallows." He nodded and let go of my hand, but without thinking, I panicked and grasped it back.

"Relax Claire. I'm just going to get us some marshmallows and sticks. I'll be right back. Go sit down next to Emily."

I sat down beside my aunt, who was sitting by herself while Uncle Sam chatted with Quil Sr. about something. She smiled at me. "Hey Claire, how are you? Are you excited to hear our legends?" Truthfully, I was. All day, Nessie had been reminding me how important it was to listen, so I had a feeling there was something specific that I needed to look out for. Quil sat down next to me, handing me a marshmallow and a stick.

"Better roast up fast, Claire, they're preparing to start the legends." He told me and I looked around, just noticing now that the atmosphere had settled. Everyone was sitting around on a log or a chair, quietly waiting. I stuck my marshmallow in the fire so that it lit up, then I blew it out, removed it from the stick and took a bite.

To my surprise, Quil burst out laughing. It almost startled me, because I don't think that I've heard him laugh since I got here. Apparently, no one else had heard the sound in a really long time, because they were all staring over here in awe. "That is honestly disgusting, Claire. How can you eat a burnt marshmallow?"

I swallowed, an involuntary smile hitting my lips. "Well, once you get past the crispy shell, the inside is perfectly soft." He stared at me for a second, and then stuck his own marshmallow in the fire. I watched his face as he popped it into his mouth and his eyes scrunched up.

"Gross." He muttered, swallowing it.

I giggled, but closed my mouth when Billy started talking. "Welcome, family." He murmured in a low, but strong voice. I was immediately mesmerised. "We are gathered here today, to welcome back one of our own. Claire," he started, and I blushed and ducked into Quil's side as everyone's eyes turned to me, "welcome home." That was the second time someone had said that to me, and it made me feel even more at ease. They were right, I was home.

"I'm sure everyone here is more than familiar with the stories that I am about to tell, but with all respect to Claire, I'm sure you will be quiet and attentive." Quil Sr. was speaking now, and his voice was raspy, but had an authoritative ring to it.

**(A/N: I'm sure we all know the legends by now, so I'm not going to waste any space or time putting them in here. If you don't know them, you can definitely google them.)**

I couldn't move, I was still lost in the stories that I just heard. I was vaguely aware of everyone scattering, leaving and Quil's eyes on me, watching me, waiting.

Werewolves.

Is that what I was supposed to be paying attention to? Is this the big secret? No, it couldn't be…

But it all makes sense. The height, the heat, never aging, they all "work" together, my mom is afraid of them and Nessie claiming that the wolves are more annoying than dangerous...

That wolf from yesterday, his eyes were the same as… They were the same as…

Quil's.

Oh my God, I'm right.

I sucked in a breath. Quil, sitting beside me, was silent until now. "Did you figure it out?" He whispered.

"You're a werewolf." I whispered back. "Holy shit, you're a damn werewolf."

I heard his giant breath and he yelled across the fire to my uncle. "She figured it out, Sam. Can you lift this stupid ban now?"

"Fine," he muttered his reluctance. "But Emily and I are going for a walk. We will be back here in a half an hour to take Claire home, got it? So you better have all your issues worked out by then." And then they were gone.

My uncle was a werewolf. My friends were werewolves. Quil was a werewolf. "How is this possible?" I whispered.

Quil barked out a sarcastic laugh. "Genetics, I guess. Bad luck."

"How long?"

"I've been a werewolf since I was sixteen." He mumbled.

Since he was sixteen… He was just a year younger than me. "I'm so sorry."

He looked at me, amused. "I think, Claire, that you are the first person who has ever said that to me."

"How old are you now?" I asked.

"I'm 31." Wow, he was old. "There's more, too." More, what else could he possibly have to tell me? "Vampires are real too."

I couldn't say I was exactly shocked, but I was curious. "Do I know any?"

His lips twitched up into a smile. "Nessie."

"_What!_" I exclaimed. My best friend was a vampire.

"Well, she's half. Her mother fell in love with her dad while she was still human, and she got pregnant and Nessie was the result. Oh, and Alice and Jasper, they're vampires too."

My head was spinning. "That boy that I met on the plane…"

Quil stiffened. "That is what I really wanted to tell you, Claire. The reason why I don't want you out on your own is because he is still here. He followed you here and he's hunting you down. When I smelt him in your bedroom the first night you were here, I almost lost it. I've been after him ever since, I almost had him so many times, but he just keeps slipping through my grasp. He's fast, that leech."

Not only did vampires and werewolves exist, but one of them was hunting me down. "Why is he after me?" I squeaked in a tiny voice. "I didn't do anything."

"Apparently, I'm not the only one who thinks you smell absolutely mouth-watering. You're his singer, the smell of your blood calls to him and it's almost irresistible."

"So… He's going to kill me?"

Quil growled and I jumped. "No, he is not. As long as I'm around, nothing will ever happen to you."

"Why do you care so much?" I asked him. "Why do you care so much about me?"

"You're my imprint." He whispered, so quietly I almost didn't hear him.

Imprint… "Like the third wife?" I said and he nodded. "Since when…?"

"You were only two." He saw my face and scrambled to explain himself. "No, Claire, it's not even like that. I just wanted to be around you and protect you. For the two years that I had you around, all I wanted to do was be your friend, your protector. It was like, when I saw you, you were the only thing that mattered to me."

My heart was stuck in my throat. "She took me away." I murmured.

"And it almost killed me."

"All of the other girls are imprints too, even Nessie?" I asked and he nodded mutely. "Wow, I don't know what to say. Quil, I think I need some time to think." I stood up abruptly and craned my neck, looking for Sam and Emily.

Quil stood up in a panic and swept me around to look at him. "Claire, before I take you home, I need you to promise me something. You can have all the time you need to think about this, but please don't go. Don't run away from me, I need you."

The intensity of his words hit me in the chest, and I wrapped my arms around his waist. "I won't leave you." I promised him. "I just got you back, I won't leave you."

He brushed a piece of hair off of my forehead. "Come on beautiful, let me take you home."

"Wait." The words came out of my mouth before I could stop them. "Will you kiss me?"

He was torn. "Claire… Just because you found out you're my imprint, doesn't mean that you have to be with me."

"I want to kiss you." I breathed out.

"You're not even eighteen…"

"Please." I begged him in a whisper. "Please, kiss me." He gave him, easily, and ducked down to meet me as I stretched up on my tiptoes. My arms locked around his neck and my lips crashed into his, anxious, urgent. I could feel his hands, pressing me tighter and I grabbed his hair in desperation. My mouth opened and a moan escaped my lips, and that's when he pushed me away.

"No more." He gasped.

Voices from behind me made us both jump. "Are you ready to go home, Claire?" Aunt Emily asked me sweetly. Sam's face was stoic, staring at Quil.

"I'm ready." I whispered. "Bye Quil."

He looked down at me and I could see his reluctance of letting me go. I knew what he was thinking, that I was going to go running and never come back, that he would never see me again. "See you around, Claire."


	8. Just Friends

**A/N: Hi guys! Are you ready for your daily (or nightly) dose of Quil and Claire? Well here you go !**

**And a big ups to everyone who reassured my faith, I'm so glad you're still here and this one is for you!  
**

"Claire, wake up." A really annoying voice was talking to me.

"Go away, Dad." I muttered. Why is it so impossible to get any sleep around here? I need locks on my door and my windows.

Laughter. "I'm not your dad."

"Quil?" I mumbled, willing to be a little more cheery than I would have been if it was anyone else.

"Do I sound like a boy to you?" It was Nessie.

I screamed and I think I startled her, because she backed up as I ran across the room, to the door, ready to make my escape. "Get away from me you vampire freak!"

Confusion and then understanding lit up her eyes. Surprisingly, instead of being offended, she broke out into laughter. "So you figured it out? Sam lifted the ban? I'm not surprised; Quil had been waiting years for you to know. By the way, I'm only _half_ vampire thank you very much."

I rubbed my eyes. "You and Jacob are going to have some freaky ass kids."

She smiled at me, sort of sadly. "I can't have kids."

"Well… Why not? You're half human…" God, I shouldn't even be having this conversation.

"My body stopped aging after seven years of life. It's unchangeable, I can't bear children anymore."

Wow… "I'm so sorry, Nessie." I mumbled.

Her laugh was genuine. "The girls around here have enough kids to satisfy my maternal needs. The only difference is that I can give them back when I'm tired of them." She sat down in my bed. _Oh my God, there is a half vampire in my room, sitting on my bed._ I knew she could sense my nerves because, with a wry smile, she told me, "I don't bite. I only bite Jacob."

I took in a relaxed breath. "Gross, Nessie." How could I have been so freaked out? This was still Nessie, just a little bit scarier. At least she wasn't a full vampire. I sat next to her on the bed and she grinned at me. Subtly, I checked for fangs. Nope, she's clear. "So, how did you get the name Nessie anyway?"

She flushed. "Nessie is a nickname. My real name is Renesmee."

"Yeah, and my name is Frankenstein."

"That's not funny, Claire." She frowned at me. "My name is actually Renesmee… My mother came up with it. It's both of my grandmother's names, Renee and Esme, put together."

I bit my lip, afraid that she might send her family to eat me if I laughed, but my inner chuckling got the best of me and I doubled over. "I'm. So. Sorry." I gasped. I was in tears. I could tell she was looking at me like I was a lunatic, but I think that I was still a little hysterical from everything that I had found out last night. "That's just not fair. No wonder you got the nickname Nessie."

She smiled fondly. "Jacob gave it to me when I was born."

"So you were a baby imprint too?"

"Yeah…" She frowned, but it looked more like a pout on her cherubic face. "But Jake didn't have to wait as long for me to grow up, or have to live without me. My family was very understanding. Jacob was my mother's best friend. He was in love with her." We both scrunched up our noses. "They kissed."

I gagged. "Nessie, that is _so_ gross! How do you kiss him without thinking about the fact that your mother's lips were there first?"

"It pops into my mind sometimes." She grumbled. "But really, Claire, other than being irrationally mean to me, how are you doing with all this?"

"Finding out that my mom took me away because she found out that Quil was a werewolf pedophile? And that he's been waiting fourteen years for my return and because I left, he's had a broken heart and a miserable attitude? I'm just dandy. Oh yeah and my Uncle's a werewolf, and everyone's been lying to me since I got here." Talking about this was getting old. "Whatever, I don't want to talk about it anymore. Where's Quil?"

Nessie frowned at me. "Nobody told you?" I shook my head and she frowned even more. "Quil got a call last night. His grandfather isn't doing too well, he's in the hospital."

I remember Quil's face from the bonfire and can only imagine how he's feeling right now. "I need to go see him."

I shot up, rushing around to get dressed but Nessie stopped me. "Claire, Claire let him have some time. He needs to be alone."

"I'm his imprint." I muttered. "I need to be there for him."

"He doesn't want to see you, Claire." _What?_ "He will, though. Like I said, just give him some time."

Last night, I told him I needed time to think. Now, the only thing I wanted to do was hold him, and _he _needed time? Life just isn't fair.

But if he needed time, I would give it to him.

* * *

Quil's grandfather died that night. I remember my dad coming in at almost midnight, red rimmed eyes and a low voice. I was half awake on the couch, but at that moment, I was alert. "No, Claire." My dad said, knowing where I wanted to go. "Just give him time, okay?"

I knew I had to give him time, Nessie had told me before, but I just wanted to see him, make sure he was okay. I just wanted to comfort him. My protests died short, when I saw the tired look in my dad's eyes. "Okay." I whispered. "Get some sleep, Dad. Goodnight." I kissed him on the cheek and went upstairs to my room and shut the door.

Deep in my pillows and sheets, I let myself cry for Quil, and prayed that he would be okay. I missed him.

_Tap, tap, tap._

I shot up, heart beating fast. Remembering what Quil had told me about the vampire following me to La Push, I stayed silent and still, like he wouldn't sense me. I snorted, knowing how ridiculous that was, but relaxed when I heard a familiar voice say my name. "Claire!" They whispered.

"Is that you, Embry?" I asked, getting up to unlatch the window. Why in the world was Embry Call, the last person in the world I would expect, tapping at my window so late? Nevertheless, I opened it and his massive body spilled in. I yawned. "What are you doing here? It's two in the morning."

I realized that I had given up all hope of sleeping a full night's sleep after moving to La Push.

"Claire, Quil really needs you." He said the only words that would get me out of the house.

As I rushed around to get dressed decently, I had to ask, "Did he ask for me?"

Embry looked guilty. "Well, no. But he's being a stubborn prick! He already told you everything, and obviously you want to see him, but he wants to let you have the choice for a 'normal' life, whatever the hell that is." Like a gentleman, he averted his eyes so I could remove my shorts and pull on yoga pants. "But he's really broken up, Claire. He's been sitting on our back porch since he got home, and he won't move."

Wait, they lived together? That was news to me. "What does this have to do with me?" I mumbled.

He had the decency to hold back his eye rolling. "You're his imprint Claire. You're the only person who could get him to move. He needs you, no matter how pigheaded he's being." He turned around. "Alright, hop on."

I obliged, and he jumped out the window, landing perfectly on his feet. I held back a scream. "Why didn't we just take the front door, Embry?"

He shrugged. "This way was cooler."

We walked the short walk over to where they lived and Embry led me around back and went inside to give us some privacy.

My heart broke into a million pieces. There he sat, hunched over, staring out into the forest with tears all down his face. He felt my presence, because he looked up at me. "Go away, Claire."

I ignored him, and sat next to him. "I'm so sorry about your grandfather."

I took his hand in mine, and he let me as he talked. "He was my best friend, he raised me when my father died and my mother moved away. La Push was my home… He was strict, but he loved me. He got me through everything, my phasing, and imprinting on you, the years where you were gone. I just can't believe that he's gone too."

"Quil…" I whispered softly. "Quil, please look at me." I brushed the hair out of his eyes, his sad, lost eyes. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere."

He shook his head. "You're going to leave me. I'm going to scare you off and you're going to leave by choice." His voice was pitiful, defeated. "I can't ask you to subject yourself to this life, just because I imprinted on you, and sure as hell not because my grandfather is dead. I'm not going to blackmail you Claire, you didn't have to come. I didn't want you to come. You should go."

I listened to his rant, biting my tongue to stop myself from yelling at him and I wrapped him up in my arms. "Shut up, you stupid idiot." I mumbled into his chest. "I wanted to come rushing over here the minute I heard. I have to be here to comfort you, I have to. I've loved you since I was two, even when I didn't know you, I loved you."

His warm arms wrapped around me and he didn't say anything, we just held each other until I started dozing off. "It's late." Quil murmured to me.

"I should be getting home. We both need to get some sleep."

I could see the conflict in his eyes as I stood to leave. "Claire…"

"What is it?"

"I need you." The words finally came out of his mouth. "Stay here with me tonight."

I didn't care that Embry was in the house, I didn't care that I would probably get in trouble with Sam and my father. All I cared about was Quil, the poor man who's heart that I had broken without even knowing. Right now, he was asking me to stay. "Of course I'll stay."

He led me quietly into the house, past Embry's room where he was passed out on his bed, snoring. He led me into his room, shut the door and lay down. I joined him, and he tucked me into his warm grasp. "Don't ever leave me again, Claire." He mumbled sleepily.

"I won't ever leave you."

* * *

I woke up cold. I was still sweaty from sleeping in Quil's arms, but I was cold and empty because he was gone. I was still at his place though, in his bed and it still smelt like him. I could hear voices down the hall, his and Embry's and they were arguing. But not with each other like I originally thought, with someone else.

"Can you please lower your voice, John? She's still sleeping." Quil murmured. Oh shit, they were talking to my dad.

I threw the blankets over my face and groaned. This was so embarrassing.

My dad did lower his voice, but not enough so that I couldn't hear him. "Just because I'm more understanding about this than her mother doesn't mean I want to find her in bed with you less than a month after she's gotten here."

"We didn't do anything, we just slept." Quil muttered, sounding mildly horrified.

"Yeah," Embry chimed in. "Quil really needed to see her, he was going through a tough time."

"I'm sorry about your grandfather, Quil." My father's voice softened. "He was a good man. But that doesn't mean that next time I wake up and find out you kidnapped my daughter from her bedroom window that I won't chase you down with a crowbar and beat the shit out of you."

"Technically it was Embry who kidnapped her…" I could only imagine the death stare that he was getting because he quickly backtracked. "I'm sorry, I understand."

"Good, now go back to whatever you were doing. I have my eye on you, Quil Ateara. And don't you dare tell Claire that I was here, I don't want her to think I don't trust her." With that, he left. Yup, I'm going to be mortified for the rest of my life. My dad just accused Quil of basically deflowering me! We're not even a couple… Hell, I'm not even sure if we're even friends yet.

The door opened and I dropped down on the pillow, closing my eyes and pretending that I was asleep. "I know you're awake." Quil sounded amused.

_Darn, busted._ I sat up, trying not to look as embarrassed as I felt, and looked Quil up and down. He looked better, tired but happier. He even smiled at me. "I'm glad to see you're feeling better."

"All thanks to you." He murmured, and I blushed as he ducked and kissed my head. "Sleep well?"

"Considering you're absolutely boiling and I woke up in a pool of my own sweat, I actually had a pretty good sleep."

"Good, come on out for breakfast, I think we have some cereal lurking in the cupboards."

"Quil, wait." I reached out and grabbed his arm, forcing him to sit back down with me. "What are we?"

"We're Quil and Claire, of course. You're a human and I'm a werewolf…" He trailed off and I smacked him as he laughed. Reveling in the sound, because it was only the second time I've ever heard it, I tried to make myself look serious even though I was almost grinning. A happy Quil makes for a happy Claire.

"I'm serious, and you know that's not what I meant. I mean, I know I'm your imprint but what does that entail?"

"Like I told you yesterday, Claire, it doesn't entail anything you don't want it to. In fact, you could leave right now and say you never want to talk to me again, and I'd have to oblige."

"I don't want that!" I panicked

He let out a chuckle. "Good, because neither do I. How about we'll say we're friends for now?" I agreed and he wrapped me in his warm arms. "I've missed you Claire, now let's go get breakfast."

The feeling of his arms around me made my stomach erupt into butterflies. Just friends… Yeah, I could do that. It was only for now.

* * *

After that night, I barely saw much of Quil for the next week. I understood, I mean he was still grieving and between doing his pack duties, work and planning his grandfather's funeral, he barely had time to eat or sleep in between.

I was lonely. Nessie and Jacob were gone for a month, going to take a trip to visit her grandparents in Alaska. My dad was in and out of the house, working and hanging out at the bar until late at night. I often found myself at Aunt Emily's, helping with my cousins or on rare occasions, babysitting Tanner at Kim and Jared's on his nights off so that they could have some alone time. Mostly, I hung out with Embry.

Embry was a pig, to say the least. He talked a lot about sex, which made me very uncomfortable but he was good company. According to Emily, Embry thought I was just the greatest. He loved the fact that I was always over, and was willing to play video games with him for hours on end. I liked hanging out with him, he was the closest thing I had to a friend right now, but I was secretly spending so much time at his place just so I could be around on those rare moments that Quil was home.

I never saw him once.

I tried to tell myself that it was okay, that I didn't own him but then I remembered that technically, I did. And I was getting tired of never seeing him. So on Friday morning, I woke up early and marched over to Sam's house. My aunt answered the door, Carson on her hip and let me in. Sam was sitting at the table, shirtless and drinking coffee. He smiled up at me. "Hey Claire, what's on your mind?"

I sat down across from him. "Uncle Sam, can you please ease up on Quil's duties? I haven't seen him since Sunday."

He frowned. "Claire, I would but I'm not the one making him patrol all the time. He does it himself. One reason, I think, is to keep him busy but the other reason is to keep you safe. We still haven't caught that damn vampire and until we do, it's not safe out there for anyone, especially you."

Worry set in on my face and Aunt Emily touched my shoulder. "Don't fret, Claire. Tomorrow is his grandfather's funeral and then I'm sure he'll have more time to spend with you. Now, while you're here, how about breakfast?"

I shook my head and chuckled. Emily was already trying to feed everyone. But as I ate my waffles, I couldn't help but feel a little depressed. It seemed like every time Quil and I had a good day, I had to go for days without seeing him. It wasn't fair.

"Oh, Rachel wanted to know if you were up for babysitting the girls tonight." Emily said as an afterthought and I scowled.

"Sure, why not? That's basically the only thing I do anymore, other than play video games with Embry and listen to his foul mouth."

I was the official La Push babysitter now, apparently. I should get paid for this.

**A/N: Review for a sneak peek!**


	9. The Aftermath

**A/N: Just to let you guys know, I'm going back through the old chapters and revising them. Some of them were just awful and a lot of things I didn't like, so if you notice anything different, that's why! Just a heads up! Now, without further ado, I give you Quil and Claire.**

Saturday morning came early, and I was showered and sitting in my room in my bra and undies. My hair was still wet and I was staring at my closet, thinking about the fact that I had absolutely nothing to wear to a funeral. There was a knock at my bedroom door and I panicked. "Don't come in!"

The door, of course, opened anyways and in stepped Embry. He didn't even seem fazed that I was standing half naked, but of course I was blushing ten shades of red. "Hey, Claire-Bear," He chirped. "I brought you a gift. Nessie gave it to me before she left and she said that you'd probably need it for today." He handed me two boxes, one held a pair of black sandals and the other held a modestly short black dress with lace sleeves. Thank God for Nessie.

I knew her and Jacob wanted to be here today, but they had already booked their trip and couldn't refund or change their date. So I was being escorted by Embry, just Embry. Of course I whined to my uncle about wanting to go with Quil, but he told me that Quil was busy and had to go early and set up and that he wouldn't have time for me because he had to deal with everything and everyone.

It sounded like a bunch of bullshit to me, pardon my language. How hard would it be for me to stand there next to him and hold his hand while people gave him their condolences?

But Sam gave me his 'my decision is final' stare, and I caved. I didn't want to put any more pressure on Quil by making him babysit me during his grandfather's funeral, so I vowed to stay as far away from his as I could manage.

"Embry, I know that you're enjoying this but _get out!_" I screamed. He quickly backed out of the door and shut it, mumbling about how I hadn't changed. "Go watch TV or something."

I slipped the dress over my head and admired it. Nessie had some good taste; I'd have to wear this dress again when I could appreciate it more. I put on some mascara and red lipstick and let my hair down, brushing it out so that it would dry absolutely ordinary. It wasn't too wet anymore, so hopefully I wouldn't catch a cold. I ran downstairs with my shoes to find Embry, not in the living room like I thought, but stuffing his face in my kitchen.

"You are such a pig, Embry." I moaned as I slid on my shoes. "Don't spill anything on your shirt and let's go, I really don't want to be late."

"Alright, alright." He complied, stepping out first so that I could lock the door behind me. Like a gentleman, he opened the car door for me with a smile. "Buckle up, Claire-Bear."

"Ugh, stop calling me that Embry. I'm not three anymore."

"Well we need to start somewhere, because I've missed out on way too much of your life than I should have." He ruffled my hair in a brotherly gesture and I was slightly touched, knowing that I had made a true friend in Embry.

We drove in silence the rest of the way and I spent the rest of the ride tapping my fingers nervously until we got there. It was beautiful and peaceful, the spot that Quil chose, and my eyes immediately searched for him. I found him, standing off to the side as every single person who arrived went up to him and shook his hand or hugged him.

There was a lot of people there, I think everyone in La Push that had ever seen the happy smile on Quil Sr.'s face were here to mourn him. Quil looked terrible, his eyes were downcast and I could see his brave face crumbling. I wanted to run to him, but Embry held my arm. "Not now, Claire. We can talk to him later. Let him be."

"Okay." I whispered and I followed him to the line of chairs where the council was sitting. We sat three rows behind Aunt Emily, Uncle Sam, Sue and Billy, who were in the front row. Emily was already red faced, dabbing her eyes with a tissue and Sam's face was stone. There was an empty chair next to Billy at the end, and it was soon filled up by Quil. My heart lurched.

Embry and I were joined by the rest of the pack and the women. They had clearly left their kids at home with a babysitter.

I saw my dad, two rows in front of me, lean over and put his hand on Quil's shoulder and whisper something in encouragement. Quil's posture visibly relaxed and I found myself glaring at the back of my father's head. Why wasn't I allowed to do that?

The ceremony started and I listened quietly to everyone who spoke, until it was Quil's turn. He got up there and stood with hunched shoulders. "My grandfather took me in, when no one else was there for me. He raised me from when I was just 13, even when he could barely take care of himself. He was my best friend, the only close family that I had left. He got me through everything… And now he's just gone. Just like that."

To my horror, tears slid down his cheeks. Quil was crying. "I can't do this." He whispered. "I need Claire." My heart stopped, and started up ten times faster. He said my name, he needs me.

I looked at Embry for confirmation, and he nudged me forward. I didn't even try to be modest about it, I took off running towards him and he crouched down as I jumped into his arms. "I'm right here, I'm right here." I whispered to him, with my arms locked around his neck. "Shh, it's alright. Everything is going to be okay."

He refused to put me down. He carried me to his seat and sat me on his lap. Revelling in it, I cuddled up to his chest as he wrapped his arms around me as tight as they could get. We finished off the service and even as everyone started to get up, he sat there with me in his arms. "Quil, you have to get up and say goodbye to your grandfather, one last time before we bury him." Uncle Sam said softly.

"Will you come with me?" He whispered.

"I won't leave you." I promised. I followed him up to the casket and noticed that everyone had gone, so that we could be alone. Even the ones responsible for putting the casket in the ground were nonchalantly doing something else. I grasped his hand even tighter.

"I don't want to say goodbye." I heard him breathe. "But I will say thank you. Thank you, grandfather, for being there for me. You will always be in my heart." He touched his hand to his grandfather's quietly. "Okay, I'm ready to go."

"You should go say goodbye to everyone. I'll catch up with you in a minute." He looked at me, confused but partly panicked too. "I promise I won't be long. I just… Want to say goodbye too."

"Okay beautiful." He murmured and left me to it.

I sighed, feeling awkward but not wanting to say this in front of Quil, in case I sounded stupid. "I want to say thank you too. Thank you for taking care of Quil when I couldn't and raising him to be the amazing man he is today. I promise, with all my heart, that I will take care of him while you're gone too." And I would, I would never break his heart again.

I turned around and walked away to meet Quil, who was waiting for me to return to his side. "I missed you." He whispered so low that I almost didn't hear him.

"I'm here." I said as I grasped his hand firmly and refused to let go. We made our way over to Embry, who reached out and grasped Quil in a tight hug.

"How you holding up, man?" He asked.

Quil smiled down at me. "A lot better than I thought I would be."

"I'm really glad, man. You ready to go home, Claire?" I blinked up at Embry. Home? I had to leave Quil in his time of need?

"I'm not going home, I'm staying with Quil." I told him, confused.

Embry laughed. "I figured that much, Squirt, but I thought I'd ask just in case. I'll see you guys later." Two brief hugs later, and he was gone.

"So, what do you want to do?" Quil asked me.

I had an idea.

* * *

"Turn around, Claire." Quil told me seriously. We were sitting somewhere deep in the woods and I was waiting for him to change into his wolf form so I could see him.

"No, I want to watch!"

"Claire, I have to take off my clothes." Oh, I flushed. "Yeah, so please just turn around for a minute."

Truthfully, naked Quil would have been a dream come true, but I had to remember that we were just friends. So I did what I was told, so that I didn't make him uncomfortable or push our boundaries. A quiet minute passed and I called out, "Quil? Can I turn around now?"

No answer, so I turned around anyway and nearly fell over.

A wolf, ten times bigger than a normal sized one, was standing in front of me. The chocolate colour of his fur matched his eyes and I immediately recognized him from the incident on the side of the road. "Quil, you're huge!" I gasped.

His wolfy form gave a snort and I rolled my eyes at his immaturity. Silently, I reached out my hand and stroked his fur. He lowered himself onto his belly and I sat next to him, running my fingers through the fur as he made a noise that almost sounded like a hum of contentment.

"This is so weird." I muttered to myself and buried my face into his head. "You're a wolf, a fricken wolf! Not even a normal sized one." I heard him whine and I laughed. "I'm a little freaked out, not going to lie, but I'm not scared. Don't worry, I won't go running away screaming. There is just one thing that I want to do though."

Warily, his big wolf eyes rolled up to look at me and I climbed onto his back. "Giddy up!" I yelled. I could only imagine what he'd be saying to me right now if he could talk, but that was the beauty of him having a tail, he couldn't talk.

He lay there for a minute, finally deciding that I wasn't going to give up and with a huge sigh that unsettled the dust below his nose, he jumped up onto his four paws and took off.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and grasped two fistfuls of hair as the wind flew in my face. Closing my eyes, I fought the urge to scream in exhilaration as he ran at amazing speeds. For a brief moment, I was invincible. Nothing could touch me.

But all too soon, he skidded to a stop and tipped me off. "Quil!" I whined. "I want to go again." He shook his head wildly and I pouted. "Fine, you party pooper. Go get dressed."

He took off into the bushes behind me and I waited quietly for his return. "I can't believe I let you take away my manhood like that." He was grumbling. "I'm a werewolf, a dangerous werewolf, not a riding horse!"

I giggled. "That was fun! Can we do it again someday?"

"No."

"But…"

"No." That was final. "Did I ever tell you that the pack can read each other's minds?"

I froze. "Read each other's minds?"

"Well, only when were in wolf form. It's like we're all joined as one. It makes it really hard to keep things from each other, so we have next to no privacy." _Every moment, every kiss we shared… It was on display for everyone. My uncle included!_ "So Seth and Brady, who were running the perimeter just now, got to see me being used as a riding horse and I will never live this down."

"That is so embarrassing." I muttered.

"I know what you're thinking Claire, and it is not that bad. They mostly keep to themselves and they sure as hell don't get involved in other people's business. But if anyone teases you, just tell me. I'll set them straight."

I flushed; there was something that I couldn't forget. "Jacob told Nessie about the time you saw me in my underwear!"

"I'll deal with Jacob." He grumbled, something unrecognizable flashing in his eyes. _Wait, so that meant he was thinking about me while I was in my underwear?_ "Come on, it's getting cold, time to get you home."

It was dinner time, and I vaguely remember Emily telling me that we were eating at her house tonight. "Wait, aren't we supposed to go to my aunt's for dinner?"

"Right, I forgot. Well alright then, let's go to Emily's. By the way, Claire, that dress looks beautiful on you. It fits your curves perfectly."

The blush that lit up my face lasted me the whole way there.

We made it just in time and by the look of the meal that Emily, Rachel and Kim had managed to cook up, I think Quil might have killed me if I had made him late and we missed out on the food. It smelled delicious. There was a huge roast, a huge salad and potatoes, vegetables, fruits, casserole, bread and cheese and a giant cake. My stomach growled, realizing that I hadn't eaten all day. "Hungry?" Quil asked, seemingly amused that he could hear my stomach.

"A little bit."

"Come on, I'll fix you a plate before the angry wolves go at it." He led me over to the table with his hand resting on my lower back. I could feel it burning through the light fabric of my dress. "I'll get you a little bit of everything."

The plate he got me was full to the brim and I don't think I'd be able to eat that in a million years, but then I realized that half of it was for him. I got it, he was afraid that he wasn't going to be able to grab enough food to satisfy his hunger. As a favor to him, I piled a little bit more of each on my plate and he grinned at me.

"I'm going to sit down outside, it is way too crowded in here."

"I'll meet you out there when I get my food." He said and turned around to wait for his turn.

I passed Emily on my way outside and she gasped. "Goodness Claire, are you sure you're going to be able to eat all of that?"

I smiled wryly. "I think I'll manage somehow, I'm pretty hungry." I opened the back door and sat down on the porch, enjoying the quiet and remembering that I hadn't called my mom in almost a week. Not wanting her to panic, I pulled my cell phone out of my purse and dialed her number. "Mom?"

A huge sigh of relief came from her end. "Claire! Thank goodness, I haven't heard from you all week. How are you?"

"I'm good Mom, how are you and the baby? Brian?"

"Brian is good, and Justin is going to be just fine." She said proudly.

"Congratulations! Wow, a little brother. I can't wait to meet him."

"It'll be nice to see you, I miss you." She paused. "How are things there? Are you enjoying yourself? How is your dad treating you?"

"It's really nice to be back, I love it here. Dad's good and so are Emily and Sam and the kids." I could hear her silence, not wanting to ask and not wanting to say too much. "Mom, it's okay. I know now."

"You know, and yet you still don't want to come home?" She whispered. "Are you sure your brain has really processed the information?"

I laughed a little. "Oh Mom, I'm not scared. I love everyone here; no one is the least bit threatening to me."

"And Quil?" She spat. "Did he tell you his little secret?"

"It wasn't even like that, Mom. He just wanted to protect me and make sure I was safe. You need to stop being so narrow-minded. I like it here, I like Quil and I'm not going to run away like you did. You broke his heart."

"He was in love with a two year old! He wasn't right!"

"I don't want to talk about this anymore, Mom. I'll talk to you later." And I hung up.

I sat there, playing with my food in shock. I had never hung up on my mother before. "Claire, are you okay?" Quil asked.

"I'm fine. I'm just tired of her attitude and not understanding how I feel."

He sat down next to me with his mountainous plate of food and took my hand. "I know this seems weird, but I understand her reasoning. If some sixteen year old told me that he was in love with our two year old daughter, I would freak out too." He backtracked. "I mean my daughter. I'm sorry, that slipped out."

"It's okay I know we're just friends."

"For now, Claire." He wrapped an arm around me. "Just until you really know what you want."

"I want you." I mumbled. "I've wanted you since the moment I saw you again. I don't need any more time."

"Well, I need time. Just wait until you're eighteen okay? Just a few months."

I could wait until then. As long as he stayed, I could wait.


	10. Stupid Claire

**A/N: Hello guys, guess what! I just graduated high school finally! So there is absolutely nothing this summer to keep me from disappearing again! Just thought I'd let you guys know!**

The summer passed by albeit too quickly. I filled my days by working at the mechanic shop with Kim in the office. I tried to be of as much use as I could, but I usually was caught glancing out the window, trying to watch Quil as he bent over a car, all greasy and sweaty.

I loved being there, I loved working with Kim and Embry and Jake. The atmosphere was always positive, the people were always friendly and the office was a really relaxing place.

When I wasn't working, I spent a lot of time with Nessie, my half vampire friend and Jake. He wouldn't let me call him Jacob anymore, and I promised him that I would only call him Jake if he stopped calling me Squirt.

One down, Embry to go. He refused to stop calling me Claire-Bear, until I was at least "thirteen in his eyes." The more time I spent with Quil, the more I spent with Embry, because we were usually always at his house.

Ah, Quil, my "for now" friend. He was trying his best to be around me without crossing his boundaries and it was extremely hard for both of us. He hadn't kissed me since the night of the bonfire, and we hadn't slept together since his grandfather died.

All traces of the vampire that was hunting me had disappeared, but Quil refused to let his guard down and loosen up. I was always with someone at all times, even when I was babysitting for one of the girls, there would be a wolf outside watching me. It was a little unsettling. I liked my privacy and knowing that when I slept, there was a wolf lurking outside my window, was not comforting to me at all.

But I couldn't worry about this stuff anymore, because even though it seemed like such a trivial human worry, after this summer filled with supernatural creatures, I was starting school today.

I had lived here on the reservation for almost three months and I still had never met anyone who went to my school. I never felt like it was important to associate myself with anyone my age, because I already had such great friends, but now I was regretting it. "Claire, relax." Quil murmured. "I can hear your heartbeat."

"What if they don't like me?" Did that really just come out of my mouth? How stupid was that?

"They will love you, Claire. How could they not? You're amazing." He hugged me tight and I sighed, knowing that because of school, we would barely have any time together anymore. "But, they better not love you too much because I'm known to be extremely jealous."

I reached for the handle of the door and turned back to say something. Quil was looking at me, with heartbroken eyes. "I'm going to miss you." I whispered and before he could back away, ducked forward and pressed a kiss to his lips. "See you later."

I ran towards the school without looking back at his face, knowing I had broken the rules. I knew he would scold me for it but the rush was exhilarating. I loved breaking the rules, especially when it came to Quil.

I stepped through the doors of the school, ready to start my senior year. Even though I was in a new place, I knew everything was going to be okay as long as Quil was there to make me feel better after school.

It passed by relatively quickly, and I learned a few things. One was that I hated math as much as every other year and two was that nobody in the school stood out to me as special. I guess I was just too used to my friends. I ate lunch with a handful of people whose names and faces did not register in my head. I sat through my afternoon classes without a peep and when the bell rang, I rushed outside, impatient to be in Quil's arms.

He wasn't there, in fact, no one was there. I figured he was just late, but after waiting a half an hour, no one showed up. So I decided that it would be fine to walk home.

That was my first mistake. I had a cell phone, I should have called someone. But I didn't.

My second mistake was taking the shortcut through the woods that cut my walk to only fifteen minutes. I vaguely remember Quil's warning about the vampire, but I remembered the fact that they hadn't had a trace of him in months. So I kept walking.

I was about halfway through, I could almost see the end of the clearing when a cold hand grabbed me and dragged me away. His hand clamped down on my mouth to stop me from screaming. My first thought was, _I am such an idiot, Quil is going to kill me._ And then I realized that I might not even live to see him again and that silenced my brain pretty fast. The panic set in right at that moment. I promised him I wouldn't leave him and now he was going to lose me because of my stupid mistake.

Before he let go of my mouth, he said, "If you scream, I will snap your neck right now." And then he released me. I fought against my urges to scream and run, I really didn't want to die like that. Instead, I turned to him and he smiled. "Hello, Claire." He whispered softly.

"Alan, what a nice surprise." I said stiffly.

He chuckled. "You're not happy to see me, which must mean that you know what I am. I'm not surprised, the way you've been hanging around those filthy mutts."

"Those are my friends." I said, but quickly snapped my mouth shut.

"So we have a feisty one huh? I love a challenge." I kept quiet this time. "Aw, don't be quiet now, that's no fun."

Were all vampires this sick and twisted? I felt sick thinking of Nessie and wondering how I could ever be afraid of her, even for a minute when there were vampires like this wandering around. "So you're going to kill me."

"For a human, you're very perceptive. I've been watching you, Claire. Just narrowly escaping the teeth of your little werewolf boyfriend multiple times. I think that after I drain you dry, I might just go after him too. Just for fun. I'm sure he'll be just itching to get a piece of me after this." His voice was wry and amused.

"Leave him alone."

"Are you going to make me, sweetheart?" The term of endearment sounded foul coming out in the sound of his smooth voice. I didn't know what to do. I was going to die either way, so I knew that there was only one thing that I could do, to ensure Quil's safety, even if I couldn't ensure mine.

"_Help me!"_ I screamed and started running, hoping that he would at least humor me and grab me as I was running, to give the wolves more time. I got about ten feet before his cold hands were on my head. The pressure was making my vision blurry.

"I told you I would snap your neck, Claire. You shouldn't underestimate a vampire." And I squeezed my eyes shut, not wanting to watch as I felt his muscles tense.

I fell into a world of blackness and the only thing I could do is pray that someone could save Quil.

* * *

I woke up to a blinding bright light. So, this was heaven? Wait, no… It smells like medicine. Was I in a hospital? I sat up and immediately regretted it, the pain and dizziness in my head was unbelievable and I was aware of someone sticking a bucket under my chin as I threw up. Slowly, I peeled my eyelids back and looked up to see who owned the arm.

The man in front of me was almost as beautiful as Nessie, with golden blond hair and caramel coloured eyes. My heart thumped and he gave me a Colgate whitening toothpaste smile. "Hello, Claire. It's nice to meet you. How are you feeling?"

"Are you Nessie's dad? Are you Edward?"

He chuckled. "No, I'm her grandfather, Carlisle Cullen." Carlisle from Alaska, what was he doing here? "You took quite a knock to the head, Claire. You've been out for just less than a day. Other than dizzy, how are you?"

"My head is killing me, where's Quil?"

He smiled. "Quil is fine. You gave him quite a scare. He just left a little while ago, he hadn't left before but I managed to convince him to go home and get some sleep this morning. He'll probably be back once he hears you're awake."

Quil was good, thank heavens. "And the vampire, where is he?"

"Dead, you're extremely lucky that Embry was patrolling near you when you yelled for help or there would have been no chance. Your head suffered quite the concussion and bruises from the vampire's tight grip." Embry saved my life. Damn it, not even a lifetime of playing video games would ever be enough to repay him. "I'll get some more morphine and send Nessie in. She's been very anxious to see you and very hard to console."

I frowned, poor Nessie. I could only imagine the scare that I put her, and everyone else through. No one was ever going to let me out of their sight again.

She came bounding in, tears sparkling in her brown eyes, followed closely by a beautiful woman who I can only guess to be Esme, her grandmother. She started hitting me before I could even say hello. "Claire, you stupid girl! What part of 'don't go into the woods alone' don't you understand!" She was yelling and crying. "We almost lost you. He almost lost you again, for good! I'm so fricken mad at you!" I let her slap me, even though her hands were almost as hard as stone until she gave up and hugged me instead.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Nessie." I whispered.

"Well, I'm just glad you're alive. This is not going to go over well with Quil. Now that he knows your awake, he's going to be furious."

Great and we were making so much progress as a couple. "Where am I?"

"You're at my house. My family left it for me when they moved. It's huge, seven or odd rooms but it's just me and Jake who live here. Carlisle came rushing from Alaska as soon as we called him. He's a great doctor, you couldn't ask for anyone better." She grasped her grandmother's hand. "This is Esme, Esme this is the infamous Claire."

"Claire, the little trouble maker." She said it, but she didn't sound mean. It was the truth though; I was always causing trouble around the Rez. "It's nice to meet you, finally."

Downstairs, the door slammed shut loudly and I cringed as the noise waves traveled through my pulsing head. "Well, I'm going to say Quil is here. We'll leave you two alone, bye Claire."

I sat up in the bed, curling my knees to my chest as Quil came in. I sat, waiting for his wrath. But it never came. "I'm so sorry, Claire."

Wait, what? "Why are you blaming yourself?"

"I should have called. I should have sent someone to come pick you up. I should have been there. I almost lost you for good. I could have lost you forever." His voice was a low whisper. "You almost died. You were so close to dying, if Embry wasn't there, you would have been gone. I owe him, I owe Embry my life."

I let out a dry chuckle. "You're not the only one."

He sighed, coming over and lifting me up easily so that he could slide me onto his lap. "Oh, Claire, what am I going to do with you?"

"I'll be eighteen in November." I mumbled.

"I know, beautiful. And I can't wait either but please, just stay seventeen for now. No more getting into trouble, I'm still mad at you and once I get over the relief that you're still here in my arms, it's going to show."

Blah, stupid werewolf.

* * *

I took the rest of the week off of school to rest up and got my work sent home to me. At least it was something to do to keep me busy, because Quil was very mad at me, like he promised.

It was Thursday evening, and we were sitting on my couch. We were both absolutely silent, the only noise was the TV in the background, my father flipping the newspaper in the kitchen and the sound my pen scribbling across my notebook, trying to focus on my homework. I could see Quil staring stonily at the TV, pretending that he was watching, but I knew he was really watching me.

After I spent another night under Carlisle's observation, I got to go home and Quil refused to let me out of his sight. This would have been fine with me, if he would talk to me, touch me or even look at me. Quil had decided to give me the _true_ silent treatment. And to make matters worse, he would not leave or let me hang out with anyone else. I needed to get out of his grasp, I was suffocating.

I let this silence go on for ten more minutes before I screamed in frustration. "You are the most annoying creature on the planet, Quil Ateara!" And then I ran upstairs before he could follow and slammed my door shut, threw myself on the bed and screamed again. "_ARGH!" _

Of course, it didn't take long for him to follow me up, enter without knocking and sit down on the bed. I didn't bother rolling over to look at him, because he wouldn't say anything anyway. "You are so damn frustrating." I grumbled into the pillow.

"Now you know how I feel on a daily basis." He said and I perked up and rolled over. My heart was thrumming in happiness; I hadn't heard his voice since Tuesday morning.

Letting my moodiness seep into my voice, I asked him, "Are you actually talking to me now?"

"I think you've suffered enough." He answered wryly and took me into his arms. I was absolutely elated, ecstatic, my heartbeat was sporadic. I pressed my face to his chest and breathed in deep. He still smelt the same. I hadn't been this close to him in days, but it felt like weeks. "God, Claire, you call me frustrating. You drive me crazy."

"I'll be eighteen in less than two months." I reminded him again, just like I did on Tuesday.

"I know, Claire. Trust me, I know."

"Quil…"

"Go to sleep, Claire. You look exhausted." I wasn't going to lie, I was absolutely drained. But when he got up to leave, I shot up in bed.

"I don't want to sleep yet, not if you're going to leave."

Quil sat down on the bed and covered his eyes. I had no idea what he was doing until he said, "If I'm going to lay with you until you fall asleep, you better put your pajamas on now before I change my mind." Scrambling through my drawers, I found a tank top and a pair of tiny shorts to put on, knowing that I would be warm falling asleep.

I crawled into bed and Quil followed me underneath the covers and he pulled me to his chest. I shivered as my shoulders touched his bare chest. He had taken off his shirt. Wrapped up in his arms against his chest, I felt warm and safe and secure. I couldn't even worry about the fact that I would be freezing when he left, I was too lost in the feeling of his lips pressing into the back of my head. I was slipping into dreamland as I murmured, "Goodnight, Quil."

"Goodnight, beautiful Claire." He whispered.

I woke up in the morning, nightmare free and still as warm and safe as I had felt when I went to sleep. There was a light snoring in my ear and strong arms were still wrapped around me.

Quil never left.


	11. Changing Boundaries

**A/N: I know, I'm throwing these chapters out like crazy. But, they're already written, so I figured that it would make up for my super long absence to whoever is still reading and hopefully it'll keep my new readers happy :)**

I was too happy for my own good.

Since that night in early September where Quil had held me while I slept, we had become inseparable. The minute I got out of school, he was always there, leaning against his car, grinning at me. On the rare moments where his patrol ran past that time, he had Embry pick me up and bring me back to their place, where he would keep me company until Quil got back.

Sam, sensing that the danger of vampires coming onto their land was minimal now, as it had been for years before I got there, cut down on patrols again. Quil only had to patrol two times a week for four hours a shift, so that freed up our time even more. One of his shifts was at night on a weekday, so I didn't miss him but during those four hours on Saturday evening, I spent my time with Nessie and occasionally, Katie, the girl I had met at school and became friends with.

He worked at the shop Sundays and by a miracle, so did I. They decided to keep me around one day a week which was perfectly okay with me as long as Quil was there.

Kim and Jared had given birth on a cool September evening to a little girl that they named Charlotte.

My life had almost come to a full circle, but there was just one little issue that I needed to solve.

It was October First today, a Friday night and I was lying on the couch with my feet in Quil's lap, watching Mythbusters. "Quil, we need to talk."

"Shush, Claire. It's Duct Tape Island! This shit is amazing." I sat up and clutched his face in my hands. "Okay, as usual, you have my full attention. What's on your mind?"

"It's my birthday in exactly a month. I'm going to be eighteen. So, I have to know, what's going to happen? What are we going to _be_?"

"Stop pressing the issue Claire, it will happen when it happens."

"No! This is not something we can just ignore until it's too late! I want to know what we are going to be."

He ran his big hand over his long face. "This is not fair, Claire. I was supposed to have more time to prepare you for this. To prepare _myself_ for this. I've had to cram fourteen years of friendship into three damn months! We're just getting settled into this relationship, the thought of things changing again scares me."

"I've wanted to be with you since I first saw you. If I had it my way, I wouldn't even want to wait until my eighteenth birthday. I would ask you to make me your girlfriend and you would kiss me the way I always dream about and you wouldn't be so reserved when you touch me. In my mind, we are already together. It doesn't scare me one bit, Quil Ateara."

"We have one more month right?" He asked me. I nodded, wondering where he was going with this. "What do you say we start practicing?" What does he mean by practicing? But before I could even voice my questions, I was laying on the couch, on my back, with Quil looming over me. "Tell me how you want me to kiss you." His voice was low, husky.

I wanted to moan out loud, his voice was so damn sexy. He smelt so damn good. How was I supposed to tell him everything I felt? How was I supposed to explain to him the passion that I wanted to feel? "Kiss me like you'll never see me again."

Pain flashed across his face and he dipped down, his lips on my lips. His tongue tangled with my tongue. His arms were on my hips, grasping them, holding me tight. My arms wouldn't stay still; they were on his face and in his hair and all down his back. He was so damn warm against me. My leg hitched over his hip and he was pressing into me so hard and I could _feel_ him.

My stomach was in knots, my head was spinning. I had never been with Quil like this before. I had never seen him so unrestrained. He was everywhere, all I could see, and all I could hear, all I could smell. This is what I lived for; this is what I was made for. His mouth pulled away and he moaned my name, low and clear. "Don't stop." I whispered. I didn't care that I was pushing every boundary, I didn't care that this was going to be on display for everyone. I just wanted more, so much more. "Quil, make love to me."

He let out a heavy sigh. "I will, Claire. I will when you are ready."

"I am ready." I groaned, but now that he was off of me, and the mood was ruined and I could think clearer, I knew I wasn't.

"You're not, Claire." He pulled me into his lap and held me like I was used to. "Stop being in such a rush to grow up, you know that I'll always be here. I'm not going anywhere without you."

I pressed my head into his chest and let him stroke my hair. "I know." I muttered. I just couldn't help jumping his bones like that, he was so damn sexy. "Now shush, Duct Tape Island is still on. I heard this shit was amazing."

"Don't swear, you're supposed to be a lady." He chided, but I could hear his smile.

Nothing had changed and I couldn't decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing. So I just decided on being happy with what I had.

After Mythbusters, Quil switched to some horror film. I absolutely hated scary movies, even though I hung out with the main stars of them on a daily basis, so Quil thought my reaction was absolutely hilarious. I was still sitting in his lap, half turned towards the TV and every time something happened, I would jump out of my socks and hide under his arm.

Quil was laughing the whole time, that bastard.

About halfway through, he got up to make popcorn and I was left on the couch by myself, cuddling a pillow for protection, when the door swung open. Without thinking, I screamed bloody murder and there was a clang in the kitchen as Quil came dashing in, a deep growl rumbling in his chest. "Claire, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

The figure in the door cleared, and I let go of my tense posture. "It's just my dad." Quil relaxed alongside of me and we turned towards my father, who was looking strangely odd.

"Claire, I thought you'd be in bed. It's one in the morning." He tried to have the disapproving fatherly tone in his voice, but he sounded guilty about something. I then noticed another figure standing behind him.

My dad had brought a woman home with him. And he thought I would be in bed so he could sneak her in. Yep, this was awkward. "Come into the kitchen, Claire." Quil said suddenly taking my arm. "I dropped the popcorn and I need your help cleaning it up."

"Okay." I muttered, all too eager to get the hell out of there. I prayed he would be out of sight before I got back. I knew Quil didn't actually drop the popcorn, but we stayed there quietly until we heard feet heading up the stairs. "Gross."

"Your dad is a very attractive man, Claire… He has needs."

"Oh my God, Quil, shut up. Shut up right now."

He laughed happily and then dropped his forehead to meet mine. "I should go." He whispered.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" I whispered back, mesmerized by the closeness of his face. I wasn't ready to let him go.

He gave me a low chuckle. "Not tonight, one unwelcome house guest is enough." And to my surprise, instead of kissing me on the cheek or the head, his fingers tipped my chin upwards and he kissed me right on the mouth. "Practice, remember? Goodnight beautiful."

My knees got all weak and my palms started to sweat. "Goodnight Quil, see you in the morning."

I loved what that boy did to me.

* * *

Charlotte, it turned out, was colicky. I found this out when I was doing my hair, getting ready to go to Port Angeles with Nessie and Katie, when my cell phone rang. The caller ID said it was Jared, which was weird because he was patrolling with Quil today. Worried that something had happened, I picked it up. "Hello?"

"Claire?" It was just Kim. She sounded on the verge of tears, and I could hear double screaming in the background. "I'm sorry, I just didn't know who else to call…" Sniffle. "I can't do this right now. Jared is gone and I'm trying to get Tanner to take his nap and Charlotte won't stop screaming so he won't go to sleep and I just want to take a bath."

I bit my lip, feeling bad. I didn't want to cancel my shopping trip to deal with some screaming kids, but I just couldn't say no. "I'll be over in a tiny bit, just let me call my friends."

"I owe you so big for this, Claire. I'm so sorry."

"Don't worry about it." I sighed and hung up, dialing both Nessie and Katie and postponing our trip until next weekend. My dad was in the bathroom, shaving and I had the notion that he was getting ready for a second date with the mystery woman. "Going to Kim's, be back later." I kissed him on the cheek.

"I'll be out late. Don't wait up." He said awkwardly and I scowled. I had woken up this morning to the both of them drinking coffee at the kitchen table. She was wearing one of his button-down shirts.

I don't think he was used to having to cover up having a woman around until I came, so he wasn't very good at it. It was so awkward; he didn't even introduce me or tell me her name. So I just went and ate breakfast at Emily's.

I walked the distance to Kim's, mentally reminding myself that I needed to save up and buy a car. Maybe they would give me more shifts at the shop, seeing as Kim either called in sick or brought her kids to the office with her. The poor girl was just haggard out.

I got there and didn't even bother knocking. She was slumped on the floor, crying baby in her arms, staring at the wall. "Oh, Kim." I gently lifted the tiny infant out of her arms and helped her to her feet. "Go ahead and take your bath, take as much time as you need." She scuffled off without a word.

I laid Charlotte down in her playpen, trying my best to block out her screaming as I lifted Tanner, who was watching TV and looking extremely tired, into my arms. He was familiar with me and extremely happy to see me. I rubbed his back and laid him down in his bed, brushing his tiny curls. "Just close your eyes and try to sleep."

I took Charlotte out into the cute little sunroom that Jared had built and swayed her gently. She was quiet and so I just kept moving her as much as I could. As her tiny eyes started to close, I didn't want to risk trying to put her in her crib and wake her up, so I just left her in my arms and sang to her softly.

I was so lost in my own world, I didn't even hear Kim come in. "You have a lovely voice." She murmured, hair still wet, looking a hundred times better than she did. "I'm sorry that you had to cancel your plans."

"I'm just glad I could help." I smiled down at the beautiful baby in my arms and brushed her cheek gently. "Besides, I needed someone to owe me a favor. I have just the perfect thing." In her ear, I whispered my plan and she squealed as I blushed.

"I know just the place!"

I was going to regret this, I just know it.

* * *

Next Saturday morning, I was in the car with Kim, who had left the kids home with Jared, Nessie and Katie. We were driving to Seattle, to pull off my big plan. Quil was a bit suspicious, because I told him I couldn't hang out with him today before patrol but I wouldn't tell him why, but he would find out soon enough.

When we got there, I barely got my feet on the ground before I was pulled away by Kim, nearly yanking my arm out of my socket. Nessie and Katie were giggling behind me and I turned to glare at them. "I swear to God, Nessie, if you tell Jacob I will never talk to you again and I will rip you apart and burn the pieces."

"Don't be so melodramatic." She rolled her eyes.

"Here we are!" Kim squealed and I dug my heels into the ground. The inside of the store was so intimidating. "Oh, no, you're not chickening out now. Come on."

I couldn't believe that I was standing inside a lingerie store.

There were thongs and lace and silk and see through underwear everywhere. "I don't even know where to start." I muttered. But Nessie, Katie and Kim were everywhere, throwing different colours and fabrics at me and shoving me into the dressing room. I tried on the first one and looked in the mirror, absolutely mortified.

"Well, how does it fit?" Katie yelled from behind the door.

"Yellow is not my colour." I muttered. "Whoever gave this to me will die."

I was forced to show them everything I tried on, being paraded around half naked. By the end of the shopping trip I had a pair of lacy black underwear and a matching bra, a see through blue polka dotted baby doll with a thong, a tight pink nightdress and only a sliver of my dignity left. "Let me pay." Kim offered as I tried to pull out the credit card that my dad had given to me. "I'm serious, I know you're trying to save up for a car and it's your birthday in three weeks. Consider it an early birthday present."

I smiled, thanked her a thousand times and left the store. But as we were walking to get frozen yogurts, I stopped in my tracks, panicked and threw the bag into Kim's hands. "What's wrong Claire?"

"He _followed _me!" I hissed under my breath. Both he and Jake were standing across the mall, trying and failing to look inconspicuous. "That bastard!" My eyes locked with his and he tried to shove Jake towards the exit. "Quil Ateara, get over here right now!" I yelled it, and even though he was far away, he still heard me and started walking towards me. "I cannot believe you were spying on me!"

He had the decency to look ashamed. "I was worried about you."

"What did you think I was going to do, go skydiving!"

"I'm sorry…"

"Well, you better be!" I exploded. "You almost ruined the surprise!" He gave me a look and I stuttered, "For Jared. The surprise Kim was getting for Jared. If he sees this, you're in trouble. Go home right now!"

He ducked down to kiss me on the lips but in anger, I turned and he caught my cheek. "Bye Claire." He whispered quietly. He and Jacob took off and Nessie hugged me, telling me she was going to go with them.

At first, I almost blurted out that she couldn't because they didn't come by car, but then I realized that she was probably fast enough to run with them. And the thought made me oddly jealous. Stupid, sexy stalking werewolf. "Let's go." I muttered, dragging Katie and Kim to the car.

I took the whole ride in silence. I wasn't exactly mad. I was more mortified than anything. What if he saw me in the lingerie store and already knew that it was me buying the lingerie?

I had to know he was going to follow me. If Quil had told me he was going out but wouldn't tell me where and I had the capability to follow him without him noticing me, I would do it. I guess I was just as much of a stalker as he was.

As I got home, I caught a glimpse of his wolf form, running the woods around my house. I slammed the door shut with extra force, just so he'd get the message not to come over when he was done.

He didn't show up and I hid my lingerie deep in my closet for another day.


	12. Moving In

**A/N: This is kind of a long chapter, I meant to cut it off earlier but it just fit together so well. **

"I'm sorry, what?" I asked my father. We were sitting at the kitchen table across from each other because he had "important news" to tell me. He said it was good news but I begged to differ.

"Their house burnt down and I invited them to come live with us. Hopefully, not just temporarily, because I was actually going to ask her to move in with me anyway and this was just a step in the right direction."

He had invited his girlfriend Paula, and her two kids to move in with us. "Dad, you've been dating her for like two weeks…"

"Actually…" He started. "I've been seeing her all summer. I just didn't know how to work up the nerve to tell you."

This was serious. Her daughter Tristan was sixteen, basically two years younger than me and she had an eight year old son named Devlin. "Dad, what are we going to do, buy a new house? There are only three rooms here."

"I was thinking that you'd share a room with Tristan…"

I groaned out loud. "Dad, how could you do this without even asking me! Sharing a room? Do you want me to have absolutely _no_ privacy!" Angrily, I stood up and ran out the front door. I didn't even hesitate to think about where I was going. I ran straight to Quil's and banged on his front door.

It was Saturday, he was probably taking a nap before his patrol later but he answered the door anyway, hair a mess and eyes bleary. He saw the tears in my eyes. "Claire, what happened?"

With my emotions out of control, I burst into tears and pressed my face into his chest. God, I was such an angsty teen. I blubbered, trying to explain everything to him at once. "And now she's going to be in my room!"

"Take a breather, Claire. You're overreacting. Have you ever met her kids?" I shook my head. "So how do you know that you won't like them? Your dad has been alone for a long time, Claire… He deserves to be happy."

I frowned up at him. He was right, he was always right and I hated it. "Why do you have to be so smart?" I grumbled.

He kissed me on the forehead. "Because I'm much older and much wiser than you. Now come on, there are cookies in the kitchen. Let's eat some before Embry gets to them."

I agreed, trying to keep an open mind. It wouldn't be so bad, right?

* * *

"I can't _take _it anymore!" I yelled in frustration. It was Halloween, the day before my eighteenth birthday and the two week mark of living with Paula and her devil children.

Tristan was the biggest slob I have ever met. I couldn't even see the floor of what used to be _my _room. She took up all the time in the bathroom, constantly took my clothes and make up without asking and she had the worst attitude I'd ever met.

Devlin was, as his named suggested, the devil. He was constantly playing pranks on me, going through my stuff and I caught him peeking at me in the shower _twice!_

"Quil, I'm going insane. I refuse to go back to that house. I absolutely refuse." We were throwing a Halloween party and I was helping him and Embry decorate their house. "If I have to listen to Tristan's voice one more time I swear to God I will snap her neck."

He sighed. He could see that I was seriously unhappy, but he had no ideas. I constantly slept over at Katie's, Nessie's and his house but I always had to go back eventually. "What do you want me to do, beautiful? You live there, that's not going to change…"

I had noticed, however, that Quil's house was three bedrooms. I asked him about it, and he said it used to belong to Sam and Emily until Carson was born and then they moved to a bigger house and now Embry and Quil rented it.

"Let me move in with you."

Both Quil and Embry froze. "Claire…"

"Well why not! In case you forgot, I'm going to be eighteen tomorrow! I could move out on my own if I wanted to, but I don't want to do that. I want to live with you guys! Come on, I'll even pay rent!"

Embry snorted and shook his head. "I'm fine with it; it's Quil you're going to have to convince. As far as I'm concerned, you already live here."

I turned towards Quil, pout already in place. "Quil, please don't make me live there anymore. Please!"

He hugged me to his chest tightly. "We will see, Claire. I promise I'll think about it." I sighed, but rested my head on him anyway. It was better than nothing. "Now come on, we have a party to plan. Get to it!"

By eleven o'clock, the party was in full swing. Most of the younger boys in the pack were there and some kids from my school and some people I've never met before. Embry was chugging back beer after beer, trying to get as drunk as he could before the alcohol burnt out of his system. Katie was there, taking shots and dancing with Brady. She was wearing some slutty cat Halloween costume and Brady loved it.

Nessie had picked out my costume for me. I was Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile, only my dress was a lot tighter and shorter and I don't think Cleopatra wore stilettos that wrapped around up to her knees. I tried to refuse but she insisted that it was sexy and that Quil would love it. He wasn't the only one either. I could see a group of guys from my school checking out my legs.

"I hate when guys ogle you like that." Quil complained, handing me a beer from the cooler. I looked at it, unsure. "What's wrong?"

I blushed. "I've never had beer before…"

He laughed. "Well, there's a first time for everything. Try it." He opened the cap for me and I took a sip and scrunched up my face. It was disgusting. He grinned at me, amused and took it from my hands, passing it behind him to Embry who winked at me and chugged it down. "Well, so much for that. Do you want something else?"

"A _root_ beer would be lovely." I smiled at him and checked the time on my phone. There was only half an hour until my eighteenth birthday. "Do you want to dance with me?" I asked Quil suddenly when he returned.

"You want to spend your last moments of being seventeen dancing with me?" I nodded. "Okay, come on then."

I spent the next twenty nine minutes swaying in the living room with Quil, and then Embry and even Collin and Brady. I was actually dancing with Katie, bopping along to the beat when someone spun me around and yanked me up into their arms.

It was Quil. "Happy eighteenth birthday, Claire…" He whispered in my ear before drawing his mouth to mine. I kissed him back with great pleasure until he broke away. "Come for a walk with me, I have something for you."

"Like a present!" I asked excitedly, following him out the back door and into the yard. I took off my shoes and walked alongside of him, barefoot. Being barefoot was better than trying to walk along the woody trail in stilettos. "Where are we going?" I piped up curiously, after walking for a few minutes.

"There's a place I want to show you, I found it when I was patrolling a long time ago." There was a little waterfall and it was surrounded by stones and colourful flowers. "Sit down."

I sat down on the largest stone, dangling my feet in the water. "It's beautiful here." I murmured. "So peaceful."

He nodded, kissed me full out of the mouth and handed me a small box. "Happy birthday." I popped it open curiously. There was a small, silver key and a note that said, _'comes with the promise of your own bathroom.' "_It's a key to my house…" He explained. "Well, mine and Embry's. And I guess yours now, too."

It took me a minute to realize what he was saying. "You're letting me move in?"

"I had the key made while you were with Nessie and I asked your father and Sam also."

I screamed out loud and jumped up and down. I probably looked like an absolute moron, but I continued squealing like a four year old. "This is the best birthday gift ever! Ah I'm so happy! Thank you so much!"

"Don't get any ideas, though. You have your _own_ room okay?"

I grinned cheekily. "Got it, boss."

"Okay, it's late, I need to get you home and into bed. You have a big day tomorrow, birthday girl." He kissed me on the forehead, took my hand and led me back home. I crept into my bed, past Tristan who was on her laptop grumbling about how unfair it was that I got to go out to a party and she was stuck babysitting her brother, and fell into a deep sleep for the last time in this room.

* * *

My father, it turns out, had _reluctantly _agreed to letting me move in with Quil. Apparently it had taken a lot of convincing from Sam. I could tell because the whole time that Quil and Embry were helping me move my stuff, he was grumbling under his breath. "Only eighteen." I heard him mutter. "Only been back for a few months."

I shook my head and went over and hugged him around the waist. "Oh Dad, I'm not leaving." I mumbled into his chest. "I just need some space."

"You better be sleeping in your own bed." He grumbled to me. "Don't think I don't have people watching, because I do."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, yeah love you Dad."

He muttered under his breath again and took off to help throw the last box of my clothes into the back of Quil's car. Quil came and wrapped an arm around my shoulder. "Hey birthday girl, ready to move in to your new home?" He had taken to calling me birthday girl all day and every time he did, I blushed.

I was eighteen now, and neither of us wanted to forget it. "I've never been this excited in my life."

Embry honked the horn at us from his own car. "Let's go, lovebirds!" He yelled out the window. "We have got a lot of unpacking to do if we're going to be ready for Claire's birthday bonfire."

I ran over to my dad, kissed him on the cheek and said goodbye one last time before I got into the open passenger door of Quil's car. When he got in the front seat, I spontaneously leaned over and kissed him full on the mouth. He grinned at me. "That'll never get old." I sighed.

"Careful, you don't want to use them all up in one day." His eyes were teasing and fun. It was the happiest I've ever seen him. It was the happiest I've ever felt.

"What time does the bonfire start?" I asked the guys and they were moving the boxes from the car to the house.

"Seven." I looked at the clock; it was only three in the afternoon. "Everyone is going to be there, Claire. They love bonfires, probably because of all the food."

"There better be cake." I threatened.

"What kind of party would it be without cake?" Quil said, smiling at me. I smiled back and he kissed me.

"Keep kissing me and I won't want to unpack anymore."

"Well, we wouldn't want that now would we?" He teased.

"I sure as hell wouldn't." Embry chimed in, opening up a box full of my underwear. "Hey Claire, I like your thong."

I blushed. Of course the first thing he'd find would be my lingerie that was _supposed_ to be a surprise. "Put that box down, Embry or no cake for you."

"Alright, touchy." He put his hands up in surrender and I grabbed the box in a flourish and shoved it in my room.

"From now on, I will open the boxes and determine which ones you are allowed to touch and unpack, got it?" They both nodded. "Good, now let's get cracking!"

"Bossy as ever." Embry mumbled and Quil chuckled in agreement.

Thankfully, we were done by six, which gave me a chance to shower and get ready for the bonfire. I was showering in their bathroom, because mine was still being built, and it was surprisingly clean considering the fact that it was used by two werewolves.

It made my heart drum a little faster knowing that while I was showering, completely naked, Quil was just outside the door and could walk in and have his way with me at any time. It was silly, because I knew that he wouldn't but it was still a nice thought. It gave me goose bumps under the hot water.

I came out and walked into my room with just my fluffy white towel wrapped around my body, not caring if anyone saw me. Unfortunately, Quil was nowhere to be found so I got ready quietly.

I decided to straighten my hair in hopes that it didn't rain at all and I put on my jeans and leg warmers overtop, because I knew it would be freezing. I put on a plain blue shirt and sweater underneath my jean jacket and laced up my hiking boots. There was a knock at my door. "Come in!"

Quil came in and chuckled. "Claire, take off the jackets. You won't need them both."

"It's November, Quil. Just because you run a thousand degrees hotter than Venus doesn't mean that I'm not going to freeze my ass off."

His hands were on my shoulders, pulling the jackets of. "Claire." He whispered in my ear. I stiffened. "I promise I will keep you warm if you get cold."

He threw the sweater in my closet and handed me the jacket. "You look nice." I commented. Nice was an understatement. He was wearing fitted jeans, instead of basketball shorts and a dark blue long sleeved v-neck with the sleeves pushed up to his elbows.

He chuckled. "We sort of match, our shirts are the same colour."

_Lucky me_ is what I wanted to say. Instead I just nodded shyly and took his outstretched hand. Embry bounded over to me and stole me out of Quil's grasp. "I have a present for you, Claire." He chuckled.

"I thought that the bathroom was my present."

"Oh, that was all Quil. I got you something else!" He handed me a wrapped package in the shape of a book. "But you can't open it until you're alone, got it?"

Curiously, I looked at Quil and he shrugged. "I haven't phased with him in forever." Alright, so he wanted to try and keep it from Quil, I could do that. I put the present under my bed for later and followed the two of them out to the cliffs.

Literally everyone was there, including Leah who I had barely seen since I had gotten here. She gave me a light squeeze and smiled. "Happy birthday kiddo. Well, I guess you aren't a kid anymore, eighteen huh?" She winked at me.

"Oh Leah, leave her alone." Quil mumbled.

"Nice to see you too, in fact it's nice to see you talking. Glad you're alive again." She reached up and ruffled his hair in a friendly gesture. "I won't monopolize you, go make your rounds."

I said hi to my Aunt, Uncle and cousins and then I went over and gave Jared and Kim quick hugs. After untangling myself from Tanner, who had recently become quite attached to me, I finally found who I was looking for. "Nessie, Jake!" I yelled.

Nessie grinned and ran over to me, tackling me around the waist and swinging me around. "Happy birthday, Claire!" She squealed and passed me over to Jacob, without my feet even touching the ground. He gave me a quick squeeze and a kiss on the cheek before ruffling my hair. "I got you something." She thrust a small box into my hand.

"You didn't have to get me anything…" I trailed off as I opened the box. "Oh Ness… It's beautiful." I pulled out the delicate looking bracelet and it glinted in the sunset.

"It's a friendship bracelet." She explained, holding up her wrist. "I have one too."

My heart swelled ten sizes as I put it around my wrist and did the clasp up. I wrapped her up in another tight hug and didn't let go for a good two minutes. "Thank you so much."

"I'm glad you like it." She blushed, but smiled back.

"Claire!" Seth jogged over and wrapped me in a bear hug. "Happy birthday and all that, but please come grab some food and eat so that we can get to the cake!"

"Alright, you big buffoon." I chuckled, following him over to the table and grabbing two slices of cheese pizza and some all dressed chips. I sat down next to Quil who had seven slices of pizza piled on his plate and he turned to grin at me, mouth full.

"Hey, birthday girl, you having fun?"

I reached up and wiped some sauce of the side of his face with my thumb and licked it. "I'm having the best time. There's no place I'd rather be."

"Claire!" I perked up. My Dad was walking towards me, cell phone to his ear. He was talking to someone and he looked annoyed. "Where's your cell? Your mother has been trying to reach you all day,"

Oops… "I think it died." I muttered and took the phone from his hands. "Hello?"

"Claire, happy birthday sweetheart."

"Thanks, Mom. How are you?"

I shifted away from Quil as she was talking. "I mailed your present. It should be there in a few days. Oh, Brian says happy birthday." Someone was talking in the background but it wasn't Brian.

"Where are you?"

She giggled. "That's the other thing I wanted to tell you. I'm in labor."

"What, you're kidding?" I cried. "Mom, I can't come out yet, I have school." I was suddenly upset that I wouldn't get to see my baby brother's birth.

"It is okay, Claire. I'll email you tons of pictures and I was hoping you could come out for your winter break, if that works for you."

Two weeks away from Quil. I looked up at him, wondering if he had heard but his face was impassive. "Sure Mom can't wait. Listen, I have to go so I'll talk to you later. Make sure you call me when he's born!"

"Of course I will. Bye Claire."

I hung up and gave the phone back to my dad, resting my chin in my hands thoughtfully. "So you're going to be a big sister, huh?" Quil murmured to me, curling me into his side.

"I guess so." I muttered. I was feeling awfully sad.

Suddenly, a giant cake with eighteen candles flickering in the wind appeared in front of my face. Embry was holding it, grinning. "Happy birthday, Claire! Now everybody sing!" And the whole group broke out into song. I stared intensely into the flames, wondering what to wish for.

"Go on beautiful," Quil murmured into my ear, "Make a wish." I had him, I had my family back. What else could I possibly need?

I finally blew out the candles, while wishing that my mother and baby brother would be healthy and fine.

* * *

The older wolves and wives dispersed first with their small children fast asleep in their arms. The Elders followed after, including my father who hugged me extra tight and gave Quil the stare of death before leaving.

Soon it was just Quil, Jake, Embry, Nessie, Seth, Megan, Brady, Collin and I. We had drawn the logs closer to the dimming fire and were all talking quietly, except for Megan who was passed out in Seth's arms.

I was eating a marshmallow the classic Claire way when Jacob informed Quil it was 11:30. Quil explained to me, while smothering the fire that all bonfires had to be put out by midnight, for precaution.

So after saying my final goodbyes and hugging everyone, I headed out with Embry and Quil. Embry wished me a happy birthday one more time before giving me a look that pointedly said _look at my gift_ before heading off to bed. Quil kissed me firmly before bidding me goodnight and I went into my room and closed the door softly.

Embry's gift was under the bed still and I tore the wrapping open. I fought the urge to scream and laugh out loud at the same time.

It was a Kama Sutra book, that horny bastard.

I looked at the clock; it was only 11:45. I had fifteen minutes to perfect my plan. I slid on my tight pink "nightgown" and made sure Embry's door was really closed and that I could hear him snoring before I opened Quil's door a crack.

"Quil," I whispered, "are you awake?"

He was lying on the bed in just his boxers, arm thrown over his eyes but he answered me. "Yeah Claire, come on in. What's up?"

I shyly opened the door so that I could slip in and gently pressed it shut with my back up against it. "It's still my birthday." I whispered. "Will you do something for me?"

"Anything." He answered immediately, a smile in his voice. "What's your game, Claire?" Before I lost my nerves, I climbed onto the bed and on top of him. His eyes bulged out of his sockets and his voice dropped two octaves. "What are you wearing?"

"Make love to me."

He bit his lip and his hands seemed to travel on their own according and run down the length of my body, landing on the curve of my butt. He groaned lowly and I lowered my lips to his. I wanted to make him groan again. "Claire…" He said in between kisses. "Claire, don't do this."

"Please…" I whispered. "I'm eighteen." I ran my hands down the length of his bare chest and he moaned again. Parts of me warmed in excitement. "Please." I whispered again as I kissed his neck. "Please."

He grabbed my hips and rolled me so that he was hovering over me. "Claire, why are you doing this to me?" He murmured. "You are a sneaky little temptress."

"You promised." I muttered, mildly horrified that my plan went wrong.

"I know, Claire but that doesn't mean you can jump me on the exact night of your birthday."

I flushed, rolling out from under him and pulling the sheets up to my chin. "This is so embarrassing."

"Please, don't be embarrassed beautiful." He whispered, stroking my face with his warm fingers. "Please don't try to rush this, I promise we will. I swear on my life that I will make love to you."

"Okay," I sighed. "But it is still my birthday… Can I sleep with you tonight?"

I knew what my dad said, what Quil and Sam had said. I was supposed to stay in my own room. But how could I do that, when I knew that Quil was only two doors away? How could I try to sleep when I knew that the best sleep that I have ever had was in my reach? "Fine, but you can only sleep here for tonight, birthday girl."

I kissed him hard. "Thank you."

"Please, go put something else on before I explode." He groaned.

I giggled and ran off quietly, putting on a proper camisole and boxer shorts before crawling back into Quil's bed. Instead of him spooning me like the last two times, he pulled me into his arms and I rested my head against his chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. His long fingers ran through my hair and as my eyes closed, I thought about my wish.

As I would soon find out, I made the wrong one.


	13. Not Goodbye

**A/N: This chapter lives up to its T rating. Hopefully this is a fair warning. There is another short, but semi-important note at the end of this chapter. Also, this is my last prewritten chapter so I apologize if my updates are a little slower.**

Two weeks. That's how long my perfectly blissful, fairy tale world lasted.

I was living with Quil, which months ago I was only dreaming about. I had my own room and my own bathroom, but I seldom slept in my own bed. Sam knew, of course, and constantly gave me shit for it but every night, after begging and pleading, Quil always let me crawl into bed right beside him.

It was my favourite place in the world. Getting teased by Embry everyday was so worth it.

There were no vampire threats, there was no more waiting around for me to be able to touch Quil and kiss him the way I wanted to. The only things I had to worry about were school, homework, remembering to keep in touch with my mother and her new family and trying not to tie Quil up to the bedpost and have my way with him.

He refused to have sex with me. No more how many times I suggested it, or tried to lead into it, I got stone cold rejected. I didn't understand why _he_ was so scared, there's no way that he'd never done it before. But he just wanted to wait, he wasn't ready is what he told me.

Well he better get ready soon, before I explode.

And this is what I found myself day dreaming about while I was sitting at Emily's table, trying to hold a conversation with her while she force-fed Carson his vegetables. "Claire, are you even listening to me?"

"Nope, not one bit." I told her truthfully and I let out a long sigh as I stared at Quil, who was playing multi-player video games with Embry. I was trying to have bonding time with my aunt, but the fact that she was constantly running after her four kids was really distracting. And I kept thinking about Quil. And Sex. And sex with Quil.

I could hear Sam talking to Seth in the other room and Carson jumped out of my aunt's lap and ran over to him crying. I chuckled to myself. He knew who the pushover was. "Just go hang with Quil." Emily sighed as she once again got up and ran after him.

I grinned and launched myself over the arm of the couch and into Quil's lap. Suddenly, Embry cheered and Quil groaned. "You made me lose." He whined, looking down at me and I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. "Not that I mind anymore."

"Gross. Hey, Claire, wanna verse me? You're better than Quil is." Embry said and I agreed, taking the controller from Quil's hand. Just as I was about to press A, there was a knock at the door.

I looked at Quil, and he looked at Embry and we were all thinking the same thing. Nobody ever knocks at Emily's. "I'll get it…" I said hesitantly and made my way to the door. I opened it to a familiar face, and a not so familiar one. "Hi Dr. Cullen, nice to see you again." I swallowed. The vampires never came into La Push unless there was something wrong.

"Hi Claire, glad to see you're feeling better. This is my son, Edward." He introduced me and I suddenly saw the resemblance to Nessie. I was nervous. "Is Sam here?"

Oh no, they were asking for Sam. Something was wrong. "Yeah, I'll go get him." I slowly walked into the other room, aware that Quil was watching me. "Sam…" I trailed off. He saw my face and his smile dropped. "Carlisle and Edward are here. They want to speak to you."

"Dakota, Kayla, take your brothers upstairs and play. Don't come down until I tell you to." He said and ushered Emily and I back into the front room. "What's going on?" He immediately asked them, without a greeting.

"Maybe we should sit down." Edward said and motioned for everyone to sit at the table. I went to sit down, but Quil pulled me straight into his lap. He was scared too. I rubbed his arm and I silently reached out to grab Embry's hand and he squeezed it tight.

Seth joined us on our left and Emily and Sam on Embry's right. The Cullen's sat so that we could see them. "Sam, you have always been there for us when we needed you." Carlisle started off and my heart almost stopped. I had heard many stories about the battles that they had participated in for the Cullen's. "That is why we are not here to ask for your help. We are just here to inform you of the situation."

"With all due respect Carlisle, you should know us better by now that if there is a threat to our homeland, we will not hesitate to join you." All the wolves at the table nodded their heads almost without thinking and I shot Emily a panicked look. She tried to look reassuring, but she failed. She was grasping Sam's arm for dear life.

"Of course we know that Sam, but the threat is not here." I relaxed a fraction of an inch. "But, if it escalates, it could become a world problem."

Embry's grip on my hand tightened, Quil pressed me harder to his chest and Seth's fingers looked like he was going to puncture the wood of Emily's table. "What exactly is going on?" Sam asked, sounding almost stiff because he was speaking through his teeth.

"The Volturi have been overthrown." I'd heard that name before somewhere. It had to be the reason why there were shivers going down my spine. "But, there's chaos. The vampires who did it are even worse than the Volturi. There are many of them. And we need to go to Europe, to Italy, to contain it before it escalates around the world. These vampires need to be taken down."

"But there are only eight of you. How are you going to take down so many outnumbered?"

"We have managed to gather up the same vampires who gave witness to Renesmee, many years ago, and also a few more." This time it was Edward speaking. "Like my father said, we are not asking for your help, we are merely leaving the situation out on the table for you to do as you will. Bella, Alice and Esme are speaking with Jacob and Nessie right now and my other brother and sister are on their way here from Nevada."

All the wolves were staring at Sam, waiting for him to speak. I was looking at the ground. "I am not your Alpha," is what he started off with. It was true. All the wolves present belonged to Jacob's pack. "But I will tell you that I am going to fight. I am not going to force my pack to come with me, I will let them make their own decisions and I am going to let Jake choose for his pack. But I am going."

My heart sunk into my stomach. I wanted to throw up when I heard Emily catch her breath. "Unfortunately, this is exactly what we were hoping you would say." Edward said solemnly. "We are taking residence at Renesmee's, so you know where to find us when your pack has come to a full decision. I'm terribly sorry." They got up and left so fast that I barely registered it.

My aunt was crying into her hands. "Come on, Emily." Sam said softly. "Let's talk upstairs."

I didn't want to look at Quil. I didn't want to hear him say it. "We need to go talk to Jake." Embry muttered.

"We will drop you off at home on the way there, Claire." Quil said to me in a hard voice.

"No." I said immediately. I refused to let Quil out of my sight, especially because I felt so close to losing him. "I'm coming too."

"Please, Claire. Please stay home."

"Don't leave me. Don't make me leave you." I begged. Embry gave Quil a look that clearly pitied me and they both agreed that I could come. We piled into a car, I don't remember whose it was, but I was sitting in the back with Quil in his lap, trying not to cry. He was holding me like I was about to disappear.

When we got to the giant fortress that was Nessie and Jake's house, I could hear her screaming from outside. I followed behind Embry through the front door. "I won't do it!" She was screaming. "I won't sit here and wait while everyone I love goes out to get slaughtered!"

"Nessie calm down." Jake said.

"Shut the fuck up Jacob Black, don't you dare talk to me!"

"Renesmee Carlie Cullen!" A voice I didn't recognize said sternly. "You stop this instant, you are not a child."

She was crying. "If I'm not a child, why can't I come with you!"

"Because it is not _safe_ out there for you! Do you think I'll be able to focus and keep my shield in place while I'm worrying about you getting killed! Do you think that Jacob will be able to fight and keep his pack in order while trying to protect you as well!"

I followed the voices and opened the door of what looked like a study. Nessie was sunk against the wall, crying into her hands and Jacob and a woman, probably her mother, were standing across the room with their faces creased in worry. Jacob looked over at our arrival, locked eyes with someone above my head and nodded once.

I fell to my knees. They were going.

"When do we leave?" Embry asked Jake under his breath, crossing the room to his side.

"The Cullen's are leaving tonight. We leave tomorrow morning."

I didn't realize that I was crying, until a noise that sounded like a strangled cat came out of my throat. "When do we come back?" Quil muttered. It sounded like he had something stuck in his throat.

A minute of silence passed. "I don't know."

Nessie screamed and bolted out of the room. The other two quickly followed her, calling for her. I could hear her throwing things around. Seth had left, presumably to go home to Megan and Embry knelt down in front of me. "Claire, please breathe. You're turning blue." He murmured. I finally got rid of the numbness that had engulfed me and inhaled. "There you go, good girl." I just continued to stare at him blankly. "I need to go for a run." He said, but he wasn't talking to me. "Are you okay to get her home?"

Quil said nothing, but they shared a moment because Embry leaned down, pressed his warm lips to my forehead and then he was gone. "Claire…" Quil trailed off. "Come on, get up. We're going home."

I didn't fight him and he lifted me off the ground bridal style and buckled me into his car. I watched the trees fly by me until Quil pulled me out of the car again, into the house and into his room. I sat on his bed. "Please talk to me." He whispered, grabbing my face in his hands. "You're scaring me."

I opened my mouth. "I…" That was all that came out at first. "Please… Please don't leave me. You can't go. I… I love you." Ah shit, I was crying again. "I just got you back."

"Don't make me choose." He whispered. "Don't make me choose between you and what I was born to do. It's not fair. I can't… I can't abandon my pack like that."

"But you can abandon me."

"Damn it, Claire!" He cried. "I don't want to leave you okay? I didn't choose this!" I stared at him as he gripped his hair in his hands. "I'm doing this for you. I'm doing this so that you can live in a world where you're safe. I was born to protect you, Claire, and I will forever do that. I have to go."

I crushed my lips to his, tears streaming down my face mixing with his. "Please be careful." I gasped out between kisses. "Please come back to me."

"I will." He let me take off his shirt and run my hands all over his body. "I will always come back to you."

I took off my own shirt and my bra. He went to speak, to put up the boundaries, but I put my finger to his lips. "Please don't stop me." I whispered.

He didn't stop me. We didn't stop. We made love and it was painful and beautiful and everything I ever wanted.

Afterwards, I lay naked on his chest, wrapped in his warm arms, trying not to think about what was next. He was stroking my hair and we were just lying there together. "It's very late, Claire." He whispered. "Please go to sleep."

How could I go to sleep? How could I go to sleep knowing that this is my last moment with Quil for who knows how long? How could I sleep knowing that when I wake up, he'll be gone? I fought my heavy eyelids. "Tell me a story." I whispered.

"One time, when you were three, I took you to the beach." He started, without skipping a beat. "You wanted to go out on the rocks that led out into the water. I didn't want to take you out there, because I was so afraid of you getting hurt, but you cried and pouted so much that I gave in."

Despite myself, I smiled. "That sounds like me."

"I put you on my shoulders and told you to grip onto my head for dear life as we went out. You were so happy out there and it made me happy knowing that I made you like that. But then, you decide that you were bored up on my shoulders and wanted to get down. Before I could even react, you had jumped off my shoulders in a single leap and into the water." Unconsciously, his arms tightened around me. "I jumped in right after you and pulled you out of the water."

"I was a pretty dumb kid huh?"

"You were." He said with a slight smile in his voice. "But as I held you, your clothes soaking wet, to my chest to try to warm you up, I asked you what you were thinking. You told me, 'I knew you would save me.'"

I ran my finger down his arm. "I guess I wasn't so dumb after all."

"I tried to follow you, you know." He said. "When your parents took you away… I chased after your car to the airport. I don't know what I was going to do, maybe try to run to California and find you, but Sam pounced on me and had to drag me home by the muzzle." He laughed, it wasn't a happy sound. "I had no idea what part of California you lived in, but I swore to myself that I wasn't going to stop searching until I found you."

"What about after? When my dad came back? Why didn't you ask him where I was and come find me?"

"I would of." He murmured. "I would have done anything to see you. But your mother was a cunning lady. She threatened to move you somewhere where no one could find you, if she ever saw me again. I couldn't let her take you away from your father… Although she ended up doing that anyway."

"I wish I found you sooner." I muttered. "I wish that we had more time."

"We will have all the time in the world when I come home." He stroked my hair even more. "I will make you my wife one day, Claire. I love you more than anything." I lay there silently, letting his promises sink into my skin.

I wanted to tell him to stop stroking my hair like that, to stop running his fingers down my arm because it was making me sleepy, but I couldn't figure out how to make my voice function. My eyes were closing and when they shut, I jerked myself awake.

But it was almost two in the morning, and my eyelids were winning. "Quil?" I breathed sleepily.

"Mmm?"

"I don't want you to go."

"I know, beautiful. I know." He murmured and the sound of his voice, his heartbeat and the feeling of his warmth surrounding me quickly lulled me off to sleep.

* * *

I woke up immediately, when I felt the warmth leave me and I heard voices and movement. "Is it time?" I heard Quil murmur sleepily.

"Yeah, it's time." Embry muttered. "All of us are going, except for Paul, Brady and Seth. Jake decided it was a good idea for each pack to have one person to stay behind, for protection and communication. Paul just couldn't leave his kids."

"We don't even know if our ranges extend that far." Quil said. He was going through his drawers, probably putting on clothes. We had both fallen asleep naked.

"I know, but we can hope." I kept my breathing even as they started talking about me. "Are you going to wake her up to say goodbye?"

"No." Quil breathed. "We said our goodbyes last night… I don't think I'll be able to do it again."

My stomach was hurting. "I'll wait for you outside." And then Embry was gone, and it was just Quil and I.

I felt his body heat as he made his way over to my side of the bed and the bed dipped down with his weight when he sat down. "I love you, Claire." He whispered. His hand was brushing pieces of my hair away from my face. I kept my eyes shut and tried to stay perfectly still. "So much. Please don't disappear while I'm gone."

He pressed one soft kiss to my lips and then he got up. When the door closed gently, I let my eyes open and the tears that had been threatening to ruin my sleep façade spilled out onto my cheeks and Quil's pillow.

I got out of bed, grabbed the shirt that was lying at the foot of the bed and put it on. It was still warm, it engulfed my whole body and it smelt like Quil. I crawled back into his bed, too big and too cold, and looked at the clock. It was a little after five in the morning.

I was exhausted, but as I lay there, my thoughts caught up with me and reality set it. Quil was gone. The house was empty.

I was alone.

**A/N: I didn't want to give anything away at the beginning so here's my question. I didn't want to have to change the rating so I did not actually include the sex scene BUT I will do an outtake if anyone wants it (:**

**And if you don't read Butterflies, I have a poll up on my profile on which story I should start next. **


	14. Passing Time

**A/N: I'm feeling a little down on this story because I haven't been getting a lot of reviews, except for my few loyal readers who review every chapter. (Love you guys!) I know people are reading it, but they don't seem to be reviewing. Is it because it's not worth the reviews? If I'm doing something wrong, let me know!**

**Anyway, without further ado, welcome to Claire's misery.**

I lay in the damn bed, in that damn shirt for two damn days. I didn't sleep, I didn't shower. I only got up to use the washroom and eat.

I hadn't heard from anyone, although I'm sure my cell phone was probably dead, no one came to see me. I hadn't heard from my dad which was surprising, but I'm sure someone had filled him in. It was probably Seth, maybe Emily.

I briefly wondered how she was doing, remembering her stricken face. I thought about Kim a lot too, and her kids and I constantly thought about Nessie and wondered how she was fairing.

There weren't a lot of people I didn't think about. Except _him_, I refused to think about him.

It was Monday morning, and I wondered if Katie would be willing to go around and collect all of my homework. I wasn't even thinking about going to school, until someone barged in my house and straight into Quil's room. The sight of him made my heart hurt, with his dark skin and height he looked too much like Quil.

"Claire, get up." Brady pulled off the blankets and I didn't even care that my shirt had ridden up and he could probably see my butt. "Have you honestly been lying here like this for the last two days? You reek, get up and get in the shower."

I rolled over and sat up, feeling my hair stick up all over the place. "I'm not going. Now leave."

He rolled his eyes. "I'm so much stronger than you. I'm not afraid to strip you naked for the world to see and shove you under the water. Now, that's only last resort so you better get up and get cracking." I stared him down for a minute, trying to call his bluff, but he reached out and grabbed a fistful of my shirt and I jumped out of bed.

"Okay, I'm going." I muttered. And Embry thought _I _was pushy. I turned on the hot water and got under and the water on my skin felt like bliss. I was quick and I did not let my mind wander and I ran from the bathroom to my own room in a towel and threw on a pair of Addidas track pants, rolled down the waist and put on a white long sleeve shirt. My wet hair went up in a bun and I went out into the kitchen.

Oh no, Brady was cooking.

There was a giant plate of scrambled eggs and bacon and toast and a glass of orange juice on the table for me. I raked over it with my eyes hesitantly. Was it edible?

"Claire, eat the food. I didn't poison it, it's not burnt." He said, sounding annoyed. I put one bite to my mouth and it tasted fine, so I started spooning in the eggs. He sat down next to me, his plate the size of Mt. Everest.

I shook my head at him. "I didn't know you could cook."

"I don't really like to tell people. Besides, if the pack found out they would make me cook for them and that's just demeaning." He shoved eight pieces of bacon in his mouth at once. "Eat up. You look like crap. What's up with the bags?"

"I've been having trouble sleeping the last couple days."

He rolled his eyes at me. "You girls always worry way too much. They are going to be just fine, okay? I wish I was out there with them…"

"You should be." I grumbled. "You should have went and let Quil stay home in your place. You just don't understand."

"No I don't, but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you sulk. I promised Quil that I would look after you and that's what I'm going to do!"

"Quil won't be very happy when he comes home to my dead body." I muttered, trying to ignore that dull pain in my chest at the mention of his name.

Brady threw the dishes in the sink. "I won't have time to kill you because he'll be back before you know it. Now let's go, school time." My protests fell short and I complied before it resulted in him threatening me with violence. As we pulled up the school, I frowned at him. "Oh don't look at me like that. Get out of the car. I'll be here to pick you up after school."

"Bye Brady."

"Oh by the way, how's your friend Katie? Has she been asking about me?"

I slammed the door shut and rolled my eyes. "Good_bye_ Brady."

"Come on, I just want her number!" He yelled at my retreating form and honked the horn repeatedly. "Bye Claire!"

* * *

To my biggest surprise, life went on. Time didn't stand still like I thought it would, being away from Quil and not knowing what could happen to him. Seth and Brady informed me that they could feel the buzzing presence of the other members in their heads, but they couldn't hear them.

I didn't expect them to, because they were thousands of miles away, but it still hurt.

I woke up every morning and had breakfast, courtesy of Brady, and I went to school with Katie, who knew nothing except for the fact that Quil and his friends were away on business. I knew what she was thinking, what kind of mechanics go to Italy on business? But thankfully, she didn't ask. And then after school I went to Brady's. Or I hung out at Emily's.

My poor aunt was hanging on by a thread for her kids, but I could see her slowly falling apart. Looking into her eyes made me sad, but I didn't want to go home to my empty house.

It had been a whole week and Nessie wasn't picking up my calls. I worried about her, like my dad worried about me. I wish he would stop calling me and showing up at my house unexpected so I could stop hiding under Quil's bed until he left.

I'm not sure why, but I didn't want to talk to him.

I was playing a card game with Brady before he left for patrol and we were sitting on my floor. "How come Quil hasn't called me?"

"Too risky." He said, distracted by his hand. "We don't want them knowing our whereabouts or anything like that, just in case. And we definitely don't want them to find out about imprints. That would be the easiest way to break down the pack."

"So I'm a liability?" I muttered.

"Nah, you're just Claire." He ruffled my hair and I scowled at him. "Well, I gotta get going if I'm going to make my shift on time. I'm gonna come crash here after patrol, okay?"

I frowned and followed him to the door. "Okay." I hated the thought of being alone. I had become attached to Brady's side this past week.

"You'll be just fine." He murmured and wrapped me in a tight hug. The familiar feeling I got when his warm arms wrapped around me made me content and he kissed my head. "See you later, Claire-a-gator."

He jogged out the door. "That sounds so lame." I said to myself.

"Yeah, lame like you!" He yelled from halfway down the street. Stupid werewolf hearing.

I checked the clock and it said six o'clock. I had approximately five hours before I went to sleep. I made grilled cheese for dinner and ate it. I did the dishes and put them away and I sat on the couch with a giant blanket wrapped around me, flicking through the channels.

I found a movie on one of the channels and I didn't bother checking the description, the only thing I knew was that it was a horror.

Oh… It's a movie about werewolves. Just my luck.

I flicked to a re-run of Teen Mom just as there was a knock at the door. I snuck my way over to the door and looked through the peephole before throwing it open. "Nessie!"

She looked horrible, even worse than I did. Was it normal for a half vampire to look so unhealthy? "Hey, can I come in?" She had a large bag over her shoulders.

"Of course… You look terrible." I said bluntly. "Haven't you been eating?"

She shrugged. "Not as much as usual. I usually hunt with Jacob…"

Oh yeah, I forgot Nessie liked blood. I crinkled up my nose in disgust. "Well we have plenty of human food here, Ness. What's with the bag?"

She glanced at me hopefully. "I was hoping I could stay with you for a while. I'll even pay rent. It's just that my house is already big enough when it's just Jake and I but now that I'm alone…"

I shrugged. "You're always welcome here. But just so you know, Brady practically lives here too." It was true, he had so much spare clothes in Embry's bedroom and I always offered him up a place to sleep after patrol or on those nights where he just needed to get away from his house. He was lonely too, he had Seth but he missed his roommate and brother Collin.

She shot her eyebrows up. "I didn't think you were friends with Brady Evans."

"I wasn't. But I guess Quil asked him to keep an eye out on me while he was gone and Brady took that to a whole other level. At first it was annoying, just like Embry used to be but he grew on me too. I like the company. He's practically my brother now."

"At least you're in human company."

I gave her a sympathetic smile and put my arm around her. "Hey it'll be just fine. Brady promised me they'd be back in no time and that we didn't even need to worry."

"I know who the Volturi were. I still remember them from so many years ago…" Her eyes closed and she shuddered. "They were horrible. I still have nightmares about them. These vampires that overtook them… If they are worse than the Volturi, I can't even imagine."

I blinked at her, my heart slowly sinking into my stomach. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that everything that Brady told you was a lie, Claire. You have every reason to be scared."

"Why don't you go ahead and get set up in my room." I pointed to the door. "I need to go for a walk."

"Be careful." She whispered. "It's cold."

I grabbed a coat and a scarf to put on before I went out the door and started walking. It was dark now, and it really gave me the creeps. I never went out after dark unless I was with Quil or another wolf and I felt a little rebellious.

But I got like five minutes before Brady sniffed me out. "Claire, what the _hell!_" He yelled. "I leave you alone for a night and you decide it's a good idea to go wandering off alone at night?" I refused to look at him and I didn't say a word. "Claire… What happened? What's wrong?"

_Do not cry, do not cry Claire._ That's what I repeated in my head about three times before I burst into tears and screamed. I took Brady aback and he jumped a little. "I hate you! Fuck you, Brady."

He went to touch my arm and I picked up the biggest rock I could find and hurled it at his head. "Shit, what the fuck!" I punched him in the chest and it fucking hurt but I punched him again until I couldn't feel it and screamed more profanities at him. "Claire, relax! Calm down!"

"You lied to me! You said that everything was going to be fine and I didn't need to worry!" I cried. "Quil is out there fighting possibly the most dangerous vampires in the world and you're telling me to fucking chill!"

"Oh Claire, come here." He pulled me into his arms.

"Don't touch me." I muttered weakly, but my efforts were futile, he was just so strong. "I still hate you."

He chuckled. "Well, that's okay. You're supposed to hate your older brother. I need to get you home, Clairy Fairy."

"That has got to be your worst nickname yet." I complained as he dragged me by the wrist back in the direction of my house. "Are you coming in?"

"Nah babe, I'm on patrol all night. The only reason I'm not in wolf form is because I needed to drag your butt back home. Get in the house, stay in the house and go to bed." He kissed me on the cheek.

I scowled. "You sound like my mother. And you have dog breath." And because he thought he was so funny, he licked me.

He licked my face. Oh my god that's disgusting. "Bye Claire!"

"You're a disgusting creature, Brady!" I yelled at him and slammed the door, wiping my face furiously with my sleeve. "Stupid dog… Hey Ness! Want to watch a movie?"

No answer. I crept to my room and opened the door and found her passed out on the bed, fully clothed with her bag unpacked. Poor girl was probably freaked out in a big house all alone. I shut the door quietly and changed into a pair of shorts and one of Quil's tees. I curled up on his bed with a book and read until I could no longer keep my eyes open and then I turned off my lamp, curled up under the blanket and went to sleep.

I was aroused, a little later by the sound of a high pitched wail. I shot up in a panic and raced into my room, scared that Nessie was hurt. But she was still asleep…

Her mouth opened and she screamed again, and I noticed the tears on her face. "Nessie!" I shook her arm. "Renesmee, wake up."

Her eyes flew open in a panic and she let out a gasp of air, wiping her face. "Claire, is that you?"

I hugged her tightly. "It's me, Ness. It was just a dream, you're fine."

"It wasn't me who was hurt…" She whispered.

"Jacob is fine too. Your family is fine." I reassured her, stroking her still perfect curls.

She shook her head. "It wasn't them either. It was Quil…"She glanced at me. "Do you feel okay? Are you in pain?"

"No I feel fine." I told her, but with a growing sickly feeling in my stomach. "Quil is fine… It was just a nightmare." I told her and myself. Quil was fine.

"I hate sleeping alone." She whispered and I knew exactly how she felt. "Can I come sleep with you?"

"My door is always open. Come on."

She curled up in Quil's bed with me and I lay there thinking about her nightmare. Unconsciously, I grabbed her hand and we fell asleep intertwined together.

* * *

I woke up to an empty bed and the clock told me that it was past noon. I could hear dishes clattering around in the kitchen. That was probably Nessie. I heard snoring from across the hall. That was definitely Brady.

As I walked into the kitchen, disoriented and hungry, I noticed a third figure sitting at the table. I flicked a glare and Nessie and she shrugged apologetically. "Hi Claire, how's life hiding under the bed?"

I sighed. "Hey Dad, how have you been?" He shot me a disapproving look and I sighed again and took the cup of coffee that Nessie was holding out to me.

"Since when do you drink coffee?" He asked.

I shrugged. "Since I moved out."

Nessie shot us both glances and grabbed a granola bar. "Yeah, I'm going to go in my room…"

"She's living here now?" He asked.

"Yeah they're just staying temporarily until the other guys come home. It's nice having company in the house, for the first two days it was way too quiet."

He looked at me. "I heard from Emily that Brady was staying here. Just don't go getting yourself into any trouble."

I snorted and sat down next to him. "Don't worry Dad. Quil is my soul mate, remember? Even if he's away, I'm only going to be loyal to him. That's one thing you don't have to worry about."

"I didn't like the idea of you living with two boys, even if they were Embry and Quil and I don't like the idea of you living with one I barely know." He grumbled.

"Brady's cool, Dad. He's like the brother I never had."

He didn't look convinced, but he gratefully changed the subject. "Speaking of brothers, your mom has been calling you for days. She wants to let you know that your ticket is booked for the day after Christmas break starts." He told me casually.

I froze. I had completely forgotten that I was supposed to be going to visit my mother over the break. "Dad…"

"Claire, no. You can't back out. Your mother is excited to see you and Danni is coming home too."

"But what if Quil…"

"if Quil comes back, I'm sure he will be more than happy to get a ticket and come with you. And if he comes back while you're away, you can come home at any time. So far, you only have a one way ticket."

I felt a little better, but still wary. I was leaving in a month… That was more than enough time for Quil to come back, wasn't it?

**A/N: To all you Butterflies readers, don't worry! I know i usually update one after another but I just so happened to crank this one out first and figured I'd post it. Kim and Jared are coming!**


	15. In Trouble

**A/N: Thank you all, especially my anonymous readers, for taking the time to come out and put your input in. It means a lot to me, which is why I immediately started working on this chapter after I updated Butterflies, instead of waiting a bit like I usually do. Consider it your reward. Plus this chapter is super long BUT this chapter also has some mature themes, so keep that in mind. You've been warned.  
**

**So, do you miss Quil as much as Claire does? ;)**

"So you leave tomorrow, don't you Claire?"

Was someone talking to me? "Claire…" Oh, it's Katie. "Are you listening to me?"

"No sorry, what did you say?"

She rolled her eyes and sighed. "I said, you leave tomorrow don't you?" I quickly snapped my head to look at her, trying to remember what day it was. "It's our last day of school before Winter Break…"

Since Quil left, I had lost all track of time. It hadn't felt like a month had just passed out of nowhere, it actually felt like it had been so much longer. I had forgotten about my upcoming trip. "I haven't even packed yet."

"You really have been out of it lately." Katie giggled. "But listen, tonight my cousin is having a party down in Seattle in order to celebrate. What time do you leave tomorrow?"

"Not until the evening. My flight is at eight."

"Well, do you want to come? We could stay overnight there and my older brother said that he would drive us there and pick us up in the morning. It'll be fun. Bring Nessie too." Her eyes lit up in excitement. "It'll be the only time the three of us will be together over the break. What do you say?"

Dread filled my stomach. The whole thing sounded like a bad idea… A party in a big city, staying at someone's house who I don't know and drinking… "I don't know… I think Quil would get mad."

She gave me a skeptical look. "Quil isn't even here!" She cried and I flinched a little bit. "Come on, just tell that other huge guy that's living at your house that you want a girl's night with Nessie and tell him to stay at his own place. We'll pick you up and be back first thing in the morning! Quil isn't going to find out."

She had a point, but what if for some reason, he did find out? He would be so upset with me.

Wait a second, why did I care? _He_ left _me!_ If he can leave me to go off on a suicide mission, then I can go out drinking. "Okay, I'm in. I'm sure Nessie will be in too."

"Yay!" She squealed and I clapped my hands over my ears. "I'll pick you up at six!"

Watch out world, here comes Rebel Claire.

* * *

Brady was a lot harder to convince than I thought.

"Come on Brady! You act like I'm throwing you out forever! You can still stay here while I'm gone." I whined when I got home. I had informed Nessie of my plan over text before school ended and we were sitting in the living room, trying to get Brady out.

He folded his arms and pouted. "But you're leaving for two whole weeks! Maybe I want to spend time with you too."

"We are spending time together, tomorrow! You're taking me out for dinner before I leave, remember?" I bargained. "It isn't going to be much fun to hang around here. All I'm going to do is pack and we're going to order a pizza, watch some chick flicks and probably cry our eyes out and then we're going to bed."

"But _Cla-a-aire…_" He whined and I rolled my eyes.

"You sound like a two year old, Brady. Put on your big boy pants and go home."

He huffed, his resolve wavering. "Fine, I'm supposed to run border at eight tonight anyway. I'll just go home and sleep until then." He didn't sound happy, I think he was a bit suspicious, but he was leaving and that's all that mattered. He turned and ruffled Nessie's hair. "Seeya later, kiddo."

She threw him a wave and turned her attention back to the TV. I followed Brady to the door and gave him a tight hug around the waist. "Thanks Brady. I really want to spend some time with Nessie before I go. You know she's still feeling a bit down."

"Yeah, yeah." He agreed, swiftly kissing the top of my head. "Pick you up at four tomorrow."

"I'll be here." I said merrily, shutting the door in his face. I watched him out the curtain until he finally jogged away and I turned back to my friend sitting on the couch and smiled mischievously. "Plan A is a go."

We high fived and retreated into the back room so that she could help me pack so I wouldn't have anything to do tomorrow. I hated packing, but Nessie made everything so much easier. She just threw in item after item, basically saying no to everything I wanted to bring and we were done in less than an hour, with plenty of time to get ready.

"I laid an outfit out for you on Quil's bed. I expect you to wear it!" She told me and I shook my head, figuring that she wouldn't let me pick out my own clothes.

We both showered, her using my bathroom and me using the boys, and I glanced down at the outfit. There was a high-waisted ruffled black skirt, white short-sleeve blouse with a grey blazer and knee high black boots. I slid on the outfit and secretly admired myself in the mirror. Even with wet hair, I looked hot.

_Good choice, Nessie._

I dried my hair and curled it so that it was perfectly springy and put on a little bit of eyeliner and red lipstick. Inside, I was giddy. I had never been to a party before.

Well technically I had, but Quil and Embry's Halloween party didn't count because I was basically under supervision 24/7.

Nessie knocked on the door before slipping in. Of course, she made me feel extremely inadequate. Her usually curly bronze hair was perfectly sleek and straight and she was wearing a mini dress full of silver sequins and they both shined against her porcelain skin. She was standing tall in pink pumps. "You look stunning, Claire!" She crooned.

Embarrassed, I frowned to myself and grabbed my bag. There was a knock at the door. "Perfect timing." I muttered to myself and threw open the door. Katie grinned at me with her long black hair in a side braid and a belted pink mini dress with nude heels.

"You guys look great!" She squealed. "I'm so excited, come on let's go!" We followed her into the car after grabbing our pre-made sandwiches so that we had something in our stomachs and prepared ourselves for the long drive.

We got there about nine thirty after a car ride of Katie singing along to the radio and almost dying twice because her brother Darren was too busy turning around and trying to flirt with Nessie instead of watching the road. By the time we pulled up next to a small white house in a slightly secluded area, already cluttered with people, I couldn't tell if it was me or Nessie who was more relieved to get out of the car. After promising to pick us up tomorrow, and winking at Nessie, he drove us and she sighed in relief.

When we entered the house, Katie immediately ran up to a slightly preppy looking boy and introduced him as her cousin Kyle. He greeted us and showed us where the food, booze and drinks were before heading off with his buddies. Then, she ran up to another boy and kissed him full on the lips. "This is my boyfriend Travis and his friends Annie, Christian and Luca." He nodded our way before making out with Katie again and Annie gave us a wave before wandering off.

The two other boys started up a conversation with us. They were a bit sketchy, but nice enough and eventually the one named Christian was getting me a beer. "I don't really drink beer." I mumbled, holding the open can in my hands.

"Just drain it. After the first few, you won't even taste it anymore." He encouraged and I plugged my nose and downed the whole thing.

I gasped. "That's seriously disgusting. I don't think I could have another one."

He led me over to the table and started mixing things together. "I'll mix you a drink. It won't taste like alcohol at all. What do you usually like?"

"Well I've never drank before." I muttered, getting a bit nervous. "I'm not sure if this is such a good idea."

He laughed. "It's okay that it's your first time. It just means you'll have one hell of a hangover tomorrow. Here, drink this." Christian passed me a red cup.

I sniffed it first and then took a drink. "This isn't so awful." I said warily, and took another sip. "What is it?"

"It's just peach schnapps and orange juice. Simple to make, but delicious." He encouraged. "Go ahead and drink up."

Hesitantly, I tipped the cup up to my lips and kept drinking. "What happened to my friends?"

Christian smiled. "They're off having a good time, just like you should be. Stop worrying so much. It's Winter Break!"

Whether I knew him or not, I knew he was right. This was probably the only time that I'd ever be at a party without Quil's supervision. This was the only time that I'd ever be able to drink as much as I wanted and not worry about his shadow following me around.

I drained the rest of what was in my cup and joined him while he talked to his friend Annie. She put an arm around me and led me back over to the table where she started giving me lessons in how to mix the best tasting drinks. I had two or three different ones, but my favourite was the one called A Tropical Dream. After that last drink, my brain started to go fuzzy and I found myself out on the floor dancing with Christian, bottle of half empty beer in my hand.

When did I start drinking beer again? I shrugged and took a gulp, barely tasting as it passed down my throat. "So!" He yelled over the loud music. "Are you having a good time now!"

I hiccuped and grinned. "I just wish I knew where N-Nessie went."

"The little bronze headed girl? She's over at the table taking shots."

He pointed in her direction and I clumsily maneuvered myself around the mass of dancing people, trying not to trip over my heels. She was facing off against a boy that had to be at least twice her size and she was up two shots on him. "What's wrong, Brian?" She teased. "Giving up already?" Her pale face was flushed pink and she grinned at me. "Hey Claire! Sit down." She patted her lap and I sat on her knee. "This is Claire, my bestest friend in the whole world!"

I waved merrily to everyone. "Hey Claire, wanna do some shots?" One of them asked me, pouring some clear liquid into a tiny glass. I took it and sipped it, before sputtering it out. The table burst out in laughter. "You don't sip them, you drain them."

"Let me show you!" Nessie exclaimed as she took the glass from me and tipped it back in one swallow. "After that, you chase it down with something like pop or whatever. But that's only for _pussies!_ Right Brian!"

The bigger man flushed and gave her the finger while someone else put another shot in front of me. I copied Nessie's movements and poured the liquid down my throat. I squeezed my eyes shut, it burned like hell. Someone handed me a red cup and I swallowed. "What is this?"

"It's some sort of mixed drink." Someone whose face I couldn't make out clearly said.

Nessie reached out and slapped them. "You don't chase a shot with more alcohol you moron." She took the cup from me and drank from it. "It's okay if you don't want to do anymore, Claire. Go grab another beer or something."

I narrowed my eyes at her. Nessie was showing off because her damn freaky half vampire side was burning off the alcohol and keeping it from overtaking her senses. "Give me another shot." I demanded and tossed it back without chasing. "Again."

After my fifth shot, my head was spinning. "No more shots, Claire." Nessie demanded.

"Shut up you show off." I slurred.

"You should drink water. It'll sober you up a bit."

I threw my head back and giggled. "I don't wanna be sober. I wanna be _numb_!"

"Okay no more drinks for Claire." She muttered, helping me stand. "I wish I knew where Katie was."

I giggled again. "She's off in the beeeedroom!" I sang. "With loverboy _Tra-a-avis_!" I heard Nessie sigh and she sat me down in a chair in the corner of the living room. The flush in her cheeks was gone and I touched her face. "You're white like a ghost!"

She shook her head. "Stay here. I'm going to get you some water." Her eyes stared into mine and I glared at her back mockingly and broke into a fit of giggles.

When she had turned and disappeared into the kitchen, I stumbled my way back through the crowd to grab myself another beer and I ran into Christian again. "Hey!" I exclaimed.

"Where did you disappear to?" He asked quietly, smiling slightly at me.

"Well, I decided I wanted to do some shots too! I'm the Queen of shots now!"

He chuckled and put his hands on my waist, swaying me back and forward with the beat. "Is that so?" He murmured. "You sure look like a Queen to me, too." I went to take another gulp of my beer and he snatched it away. "No more to drink for you. I think you need to go lie down and sober up."

I went to protest, but then everything went blurry and I stumbled along. "Okay." I hiccuped. He grabbed my hand and led me away, down the hall to the room at the very back. There was a large bed and I immediately ran and jumped on it. "Wee!" I giggled to myself, lying back onto the fluffy pillows. He crawled onto the bed next to me and even in my haze, I noticed something funny. "You really know how to hold your liquor." I slurred.

He wasn't flushed or acting silly. He was calm, cool and collected. The smirk that came on his face frightened me. "You must be drunker than I thought. I haven't had a sip of alcohol all night." I frowned, trying to think but it hurt my brain to try to remember.

"But why? Thought you said it was time to loosen up."

His hand brushed the hair on my face. "I usually like to loosen up a _different_ kind of way while at a party." His mouth came down to kiss me and I pushed his face away.

"Sorry but I have a soul mate." I blurted out.

"Soul mate? Well that's a new one. Usually it's 'I have a boyfriend' or 'I'm married' or 'I'm not interested." He said conversationally. I stared at him, trying to comprehend what he was saying. I had never said any of those things.

After my fuzzy brain chugged through my thoughts, I finally realized he was talking about other girls. "I need to go." I tried to hop down from the bed but my feet were unsteady and I fell to my knees. He came around the other side of the bed and started to unzip his jeans. "No, I-I don't want to."

"Did I say you had a choice?" He growled, grabbing my arm and throwing me up on the bed. His hand started to reach up my skirt and I kicked him in the face on reflex. It barely fazed him and he got on top of me and held down my arms.

I guess I should have screamed, but I couldn't find my voice. I just knew I was crying and hating myself for letting Katie drag me here and being stupid enough not to tell Brady where I was and drinking myself into a stupor. I had almost given up, squeezing my eyes shut when the door broke open.

In surprise, Christian jumped off of me and I scrambled off the bed and into the corner, peering up at my saviour. It was Brady, and he looked animalistic. "Brady?" I whispered.

His eyes shot to me and Christian tried to bolt out of the room but Brady grabbed him by the neck. "You're not fucking going anywhere." He growled. "Claire, get out of here now. Nessie is waiting in the car with Seth."

"Brady…"

"_Now, Claire!" _He snarled and I jumped to my feet, suddenly sobering up and stumbled my way to the front door where I found Seth parked and Nessie curled up in the back seat.

I climbed in beside her. "Where's Katie?" I whispered.

"She didn't want to come. I couldn't exactly force her. I just hope she'll be fine." Nessie responded. I peered up at Seth and he shot me a menacing glare.

"How did you find us?" I asked.

"Brady stopped by your house to check on you guys around one and you were gone. So he panicked and went to Katie's and literally threatened your whereabouts out of her older brother. He came to me in a panic and we drove here as fast as we could, almost getting arrested three times." Seth stated in a cold, hard voice. "It's almost four in the morning."

"Seth I'm sorry…" I started to apologize but Nessie shook her head at me.

"Don't even talk to me. I can barely look at you two right now. What would Jacob and Quil say if they found out how stupid you were both being? You reek of alcohol, Claire. You're a mess."

I realized that we were starting to drive. "What about Brady?" I whispered. I remembered the betrayal on his face and shuddered. He probably hated me.

"Brady has other things to take care of." And that was that. We drove the rest of the drive in absolute silence. When Seth pulled up to our house, he sped away the minute the door was shut.

We stepped in the door and I looked apologetically at Nessie. "I'm so sorry, this was a stupid idea."

"I should have been watching you." She muttered. "It's not all your fault. I'll see you in the morning." We both retreated to our bedrooms and I fell into a quick sleep, despite my growing guilt.

* * *

When I woke up around noon, there was a glass of water and two Advil's lying on the bedside table. I swallowed them quickly, immediately noticing my pounding headache and made my way into the bathroom to shower, because I stank like sweat, booze and vomit because I had thrown up in my sleep last night.

After I was dressed, I checked Brady's room. Empty. But on the table was a fresh plate of muffins. I smiled softly and scarfed one down before bundling myself up and leaving a still sleeping Nessie in the house as I went to go apologize to Brady.

On my way home, I got a phone call on my cell from Katie. I picked it up and before I could finish my hello, she was sighing in relief. "Oh my God, I thought you were dead! Is Nessie with you?"

"Yes, of course. What's wrong Katie?"

"Do you remember how I introduced you to Travis' friends?" A shiver ran down my spine. I remembered very well. "Well, one of them, Christian, was found dead in an alleyway not too far from Kyle's house! Mauled by some sort of animal, like a coyote or something!" She exclaimed. "I woke up this morning and I couldn't find you or Ness and I freaked out. But I'm so glad you're okay."

"Yeah, we're just fine." I breathed. "Listen Katie, I have to go. I'll see you when I get back from my trip." I hung up and ran the rest of the way to Brady's. I pounded my fists on the door. "Brady!" I called. "Brady, open up!"

He swung the door open. "What do you want?"

He looked dreadful. Like he hadn't slept. Like he was being eaten up by guilt. I swallowed. "So it was you." I whispered.

"Claire, I don't want to talk about that." His voice was hoarse and I threw my arms around his waist. I held him for a few minutes and finally he spoke. "I killed another human being." He muttered.

"Brady it's okay. Let's sit down and talk."

"I heard what he said to you, that little creep." He growled under his breath, fists clenched. "I dragged him out of the house before I lost control. Everyone was in their own little world, nobody noticed. I asked him what he had been doing to poor innocent girls. He bragged about his conquests." A shudder ran through him. "He took advantage of so many girls. He ruined their lives. And he was fucking happy about it."

He was starting to shake. I didn't want to back away like I was scared, so I started running my hands up his arm. "Brady, relax. It's okay."

"I lost it. I phased and before I could even blink, he was dead and his blood was in my fur and I couldn't even think I just ran. I ran all the way home and I stood in the shower for hours, trying to wash off the blood and all the guilt. I killed a living person." His head fell into his hands.

"He was a sick person." I whispered. "You have nothing to feel guilty about."

"Yes I do." He croaked with his voice thick with tears. "I killed someone. No matter how sick they are, that's not okay."

I had nothing to say to make him feel better. So I just hugged him.

* * *

Getting out of the car, I watched a plane fly overhead while Brady grabbed my suitcase and carry-on from the trunk. "I love watching airplanes. They're so fascinating."

"I'm terrified of heights." He admitted, setting the bag on the ground and rolling it alongside of me.

I giggled. "You're afraid of heights, but you fight vampires." It seemed funny to me, especially now that Brady was feeling a lot better than he had been earlier. He was still mad at me, but less so and he waited with me while I checked in my luggage and walked with me through Sea-Tac.

"I can't go any further." He said. "Security is right up there. So… Be good okay?"

I nodded. "Yes sir."

"I mean it, Claire. I promised Quil that I would look after you so if I find out that you're getting yourself in trouble, I will come to California and drag you home where I can keep an eye on you."

I rolled my eyes at him. "I'm pretty sure Quil said look after me, not stalk me every second of my life."

"Is there really a difference with him?" He asked and I had to admit that he was right, so I shook my head and laughed. And then I threw my arms around his waist and he hugged me back. "I'll see you in two weeks, okay?"

"Two weeks. Got it. And you promise that you'll call me and let me know when they're on their way back?"

"I promise, Claire." He said exasperated. I had asked him the same question at least six times on the way here. "Now get out of here, go soak up the sun."

"See you soon, Brady." I murmured. Hopefully, he wouldn't be the only person I would see soon. He shot me a smile and I turned around to walk towards security. As I was waiting in line, I turned back and he waved.

I waved back, took off my shoes and stepped through the metal detector.

California, here I come.

**A/N: I do not condone underage drinking…. Or murder for that matter. Just so that's clear.**


	16. Homecoming Present

**A/N: Kind of short, but to the point. This chapter is about acceptance, closure and understanding. Oh, and there's a cliffie at the end, sorry.**

I met my step-dad where I went to pick up my luggage. He was standing there, looking the same as ever but somehow different. "Well don't you look like a father." I teased, giving him a hug. He smiled back at me quietly and took my baggage from me, leading me out into the hot California sun. I immediately removed the jacket I was wearing and put my long hair up in a ponytail.

"You look different." He commented on the drive home.

I shrugged. "I'm older now."

"I guess, but that's not it. You look happier."

I laughed a little bit. It was wry without humor. "That's the first time I've heard someone say that to me in a while." I rested my head back and closed my eyes after checking my cell phone a million times. No texts or calls from anyone.

Quil wasn't coming home anytime soon.

I tried to wash my worries out of my head as we pulled into the driveway of my old house. A warmish feeling spread through my chest. It really was great to be back for a while. My excitement bubbled up in my chest and I ran out of the car, leaving Brian behind and running through the front door.

My mother met me halfway, her chestnut hair in a high bun and a face splitting grin on her face. "Claire!" She exclaimed as I threw my arms around her neck. She lifted me off the ground and spun me around.

"It's so good to see you." I breathed. It really, really was.

"I am so sorry about everything that's happened between us, Claire. I mean, look at you! You're so happy! You have so much colour in your cheeks and I'm just so sorry that I didn't talk to you about all of this. I just thought that I was doing the best thing for you." She was just going on and on. "And now, I have another chance to raise a child…"

I took her hands. "It's okay, Mom. I forgive you."

And I really, truly did.

She shook her head. "I just can't get over how beautiful you look." She murmured. "Danni will be back home tomorrow and our whole family will be together."

"Speaking of family, where is my little brother?"

She smiled. "He's sleeping. Why don't you go unpack and I'll bring him to you when he's awake?"

I made my way into my old room, a rush of familiarity hitting me in the stomach. My bedspread was the same, there were still posters of the Beatles on the light blue walls and the creamy yellow curtains were drawn open to reveal the sun. My hand ran across the wall and touched everything that they came in contact with.

I opened up the white dresser and started piling my clothes in. My cell, which I had thrown on the bed, rang about twenty minutes later. I answered it quickly. "Brady? What's going on?"

"Relax, Claire. Can't I call you without you freaking out about Quil?" He asked. "I just wanted to make sure you had a safe flight and made it home."

I was disappointed but relieved at the same time. I was relieved that Quil wasn't hurt and relived that I didn't have to leave already. "I'm sorry. Yes, I made it in fine and I'm just getting settled in now."

"Oh that's good… What? No, I'm talking to her. Shut up, I can't hear!" He yelled. "Oh really, you're going to bite me? Well do i- _Ow!_"

There was rustling on the other end. "Claire?"

I giggled. "Hi Nessie!"

"Are you coming home yet?" She whined. "I'm tired of living with Brady, he's a pig!"

"Just a couple weeks and I'll be back. Hold down the fort for me and don't let Brady bring too many strange women home okay? And if he does, make sure it's on Embry's bed."

"Well, I miss you already!" She said.

"I miss you more!" Brady shouted.

"Stop yelling in my ear!"

"Give me back the phone."

"No!"

I shook my head, smiling to myself. "Guys, please try not to kill each other while I'm gone. I have to go okay? I love and miss you both equally okay? Sheesh, Brady you're twenty seven years old, start acting like it."

Nessie giggled and I heard Brady mumble something under his breath. "Well, have fun in sunny California. Don't forget to call me while you're gone. Bye!"

I hung up after I heard the click and put my phone down on the nightstand, my previous excitement fading. I was happy to be here, but I missed _home_ again and my friends. I jumped up when there was a knock at my door.

"Claire?" Brian said, his head peeking through. "Justin's awake if you want to come see him."

I hopped up off the bed and followed him into their room, where my mom was holding the sweetest looking baby in her arms, her smile threatening to fall off her face. His little blue eyes were fluttering around the room and his plump lips were set in an O shape. I actually squealed out loud. "He is beyond beautiful, Mom."

"Here." She said softly, passing him to me.

His eyes looked up at my face and his fingers curled around mine as I looked down at him. Gently, I lifted him up so that I could kiss his soft head with my lips. "Wow, you guys did a great job." I joked lamely, passing him back to my mother so that she could feed him.

She and my step-dad shared a look and she stroked the top of Justin's head with her finger. I smiled to myself. All the guilt that I have had about leaving just melted away. I shared a look with my mother and we finally understood each other, for the first time since I was a little girl.

She had her new family, and I had mine.

* * *

When my sister arrived that morning, I thought my legs were going to fall off. I was jumping up and down outside the front door, waiting for her car to pull in. "Hurry up, hurry up!" I cried to myself.

My mom shook her head at me and laughed from her place in the kitchen where she was making us a welcome home breakfast that consisted of smiley face pancakes with cut up strawberries. Our favourite meal from when we were younger.

When the small silver car pulled into the driveway, I squealed with joy and threw open the door so fast that it ricocheted off the wall as I ran outside. When she stepped out of the car, all slender bodied with her short black hair tied back in a ponytail, she matched my squeal and we ran towards each other, hugging and jumping up and down and laughing.

All of a sudden, we were kids again. "Hey little sister!" She exclaimed. "Look at you! You are so…"

"Short?" I supplied with a laugh.

"Well, I guess I can't say that you've grown." She chuckled, hugging me again. I inhaled against her leather jacket. She still smelled the same.

I bit my lip and looked up at her excitedly. "I'm so happy you're here." I told her honestly and warmly. "How is college?"

"Oh it's amazing." She gushed. "The workload is pretty crazy but it's great. What's new in your life, sis?"

I just looked at her. "We have _so_ much to talk about."

* * *

"You're dating _Quil_!?" She exclaimed, sitting up from her recently horizontal position. "Isn't he like thirty?"

I blushed, looking at my lap. "Thirty two if you want to be exact."

"Does Mom know about this?" She asked and I nodded at her surprised look. "Dad knows too?" I nodded again. "How far has it gone?" My face immediately darkened and she gasped. "You had sex with him didn't you!?" She hissed.

"Shush!" I hissed back. "Keep it down."

She shook her head at me in amazement. "I didn't know you had it in you!"

"It's…complicated." I supplied lamely.

"Yeah I'll bet…" She shook her head once more. "Well, anyway, how's Dad?"

I sighed. "He has a new girlfriend." She raised her eyebrows at me. "Yeah, her and her two kids are living with him now."

"Living with him? You mean you don't live there anymore?" She asked quizzically. I cursed her, she was way too observant for her own good. "You live with Quil don't you!?"

"Well not just him, his best friend Embry lives there too. Don't act like it's so scandalous! I only moved out because there wasn't enough room at Dad's place and they had an empty room, which they offered me to rent. Hear that? I have my _own_ room." I emphasized.

Not like I ever used it, but still.

"I'm taking it Mom knows nothing?"

"And I would like to keep it that way too, please and thank you."

"I can't believe it. My goody two shoes sister, the one who never skipped class, never tried alcohol, never did drugs and never even broke curfew, is living with two thirty year old men and having _sex_ with one of them!" She cried. "I at least hope you're being safe."

I shrugged. "We only did it once way back in November and we used a condom and Aunt Emily put me on the pill a few weeks ago."

"Only once in a whole month? Is he a prude?"

"He's away…" I muttered. "He had to go away on business, and that's the only reason we did it. I basically seduced him."

"Claire, you filthy slut!" She exclaimed, throwing a pillow at my head. "I feel like I don't even know you anymore!"

"Oh please, I'm still the same. I'm just not a virgin and I have a thirty two year old boyfriend." I shrugged like it was no big deal and we both laughed together. "It's like two in the morning. We need to go to sleep."

"Fine, you party pooper. You _were_ always the one who crashed early when we tried to pull an all-nighter." I rearranged the pillows and turned off the lamp on the nightstand. "Goodnight, Claire."

I mumbled my goodnight and closed my eyes, easily slipping off to sleep after a long day of excitement.

All too soon, maybe less than an hour later, I shot up in bed, gasping for air. Danni didn't notice, she had always been a heavy sleeper and she just turned over on her side and mumbled in her sleep.

Quietly, I slipped out of bed and into the bathroom where I shut the door and washed my face with cold tap water. The nightmare that had scared me so bad was already fading from my head, and I couldn't even remember what it was about. The only thing I knew was that there was a tight pain in my chest, and it was making it hard to breathe.

I stood in front of the mirror for a few minutes, trying to catch my breath and wait out the pain, but it never faded. Eventually, I gave up and climbed back into bed, trying my hardest to fall back asleep. It didn't work, and I lay there for hours until the sun came up and it was an acceptable time to wake up and start the day.

* * *

The throbbing, tightening feeling in my chest got worse as the days went on.

I tried to ignore it, tried to distract myself by helping my mother around the house. I cooked breakfast almost every morning, because I barely slept more than a few hours a night. I helped out with Justin as much as I could, changing diapers and entertaining him while everyone else was busy. I went places with Danni like the mall and the beach and out for dinner, but not a single one of these distractions was able to take away from the pain.

On day four, the pain got so bad that I started throwing up sometimes.

On day number five, while we were out at the mall again, I suddenly gasped out loud and fell to my knees, clutching my chest and moaning until my sister helped me to my feet and dragged me into the car. "I need to take you to the hospital." She insisted.

"No, please." I moaned. "I'm fine."

"Claire, you are not fine."

I shook my head. "Please Danni."

"Okay, I won't take you. But if it gets worse, we're going okay?"

It got worse, but I didn't mention it. I was an expert at pretending I wasn't constantly in pain. On day six, I "woke" up bright and early and turned on a hot shower, content to sit on the floor of the bathtub and let the water hit me.

I let myself grimace every time it throbbed and tightened, because I was alone. And then when I was done, I had perfected my mask of serenity and I wore it all day.

On day seven, exactly halfway through my vacation, Brady called me. This wasn't unusual. I had been keeping in contact with him and Nessie all week. I didn't tell either of them of this ongoing chest pain though.

I didn't know what it was, but it couldn't be good. And I wanted to keep it to myself until I figured out how bad it was.

When I answered the phone, Brady was near hysterical. "You have to come home right now."

"What? Brady, please slow down. Why do I need to come home?" I asked nervously.

"Get your ticket for the first flight you can today and get home immediately." He repeated.

My heart pounded loudly inside my chest. "Brady, tell me what's going on."

It was my worst nightmare. "They're coming home, Claire. And Quil is hurt."

"How bad?" I whispered, fingers trembling to the point where I could barely hold the phone to my face. There was a whirring noise in my head and it almost felt like my ears were hollowed out. I didn't realize I was gasping for breath until I noticed my lungs were tight. The pain in my chest was as bad as it could be.

"It's bad, Claire. Really bad."

**A/N: This was short, unfortunately, but I promise the next one will be longer and you won't have to wait as long. **


	17. Death's Door

When I left for home the next morning, I couldn't decide how I felt. I was numb. My sister was pissed at me for leaving so soon. "I come home and you leave early?" She had said. "Am I that bad to be around?"

My mom, who knew about the situation and where they were, understood why I was leaving. All I had to say was, "He's in trouble."

I left them behind anxiously, and spent the whole flight chewing off my fingernails. When I got to Port Angeles, it was a bittersweet homecoming. But even though my worries were gnawing deep in my stomach and I was jittery beyond belief, I shoved down all of my feelings and let myself be happy for a brief moment when I spotted my uncle and Embry, waiting for me.

I threw myself into Embry's arms and let him hold me, before I kissed my uncle on the cheek in greeting. "It's really nice to see you both." I told them honestly. And it really, really was. After over a month of wondering if they were going to make it home alive, it was a relief.

"It's good to be home." Sam said solemnly.

"Did you…?" I asked awkwardly. "I mean, is the problem gone?"

He nodded. "But not without sacrifice."

My heart stopped. "Who…?"

Embry shook his head and butted in. "Don't listen to Sam." He said. "He's just being Alpha-y and professional. We didn't lose anyone and none of the Cullen's got taken out either. A few of their allies, however, weren't so lucky."

I filled with relief again. "Is anyone else hurt other than him?" I didn't mention names, it hurt too much.

"Nothing that won't heal." Embry said. And no one else spoke as we walked to the car. And no one else spoke as we drove home. I looked out the window, letting my stomach fill with dread. I had no idea what awaited me.

We didn't go to La Push. Instead, we pulled into the driveway of Nessie's place. "Why are we here?" I muttered. I didn't want to see Nessie, I wanted to see him.

"He's here." Embry muttered. "Under the care of Dr. Fang." I threw my door open and started running up the stairs when Embry grabbed my arm. "Claire, I have to warn you, it's not what you expect."

"I just need to see him. Please let me go."

"Claire, he's unconscious. You're not going to be able to talk to him." I blinked, trying to understand. "I know it doesn't make much sense." He said soothingly. "But Carlisle is keeping him under on purpose. The injuries are bad, because they were vampire inflicted. We don't want him to be in pain, so he's pumping nearly litres of medication into him at a time so that he doesn't burn it off."

I tried to remember what Quil had told me about vampires. Didn't he say they were poisonous to werewolves? I sort of stared emotionlessly at Embry. "Did he get bit?"

Was this it? Was I here to watch Quil die?

"No, Claire. God no." Embry whispered quickly. "He didn't get bit. But, the vampire punctured him right down to his organs and they're all out of whack. It's bad."

I stared at him for what seemed like forever. And yet, I couldn't bring myself to ask the question that haunted my mind. Will he get better? "I still want to see him." I whispered.

"I'll show you where he is." Embry murmured, and he took my small hand in his and led me through the mansion.

There were people, or vampires I should say, all through the house. Some like Alice and Jasper, I recognized, but there were others who were foreign to me. I didn't bother to stop and say hello, I just kept my head down and looked at my feet until I came to a room. There were monitors and IV's and it reminded me too much of a hospital, and it was the same room that I had been in when I was attacked by a vampire.

Carlisle was there and he turned to face us when we entered, all business. "No big changes. The organs are healing, but not as fast as other wounds would." He told Embry and then he looked at me sadly. "Claire, I know you're anxious but can I have a word with you in private?"

Embry growled at him. "No. Let me tell her. I'm her family." Carlisle nodded in understanding and left the room swiftly. "Claire, what Carlisle is trying to say is that if his organs can't heal fast enough, then it will escalate beyond his control. And no matter what kind of super healing he has, if they aren't recovered enough to function…" He trailed off. "There's no way that he'll be able to make it through that alive."

"Can you leave please?" I mumbled, lip trembling.

"Claire, don't shut me out…"

"Just go!" I screamed. "You don't understand so just _get out_!" I slammed the door shut behind him and locked it, as if it would keep everyone out if they wanted to come in. And I curled up in a ball against the door, sinking to the floor and I let myself cry. I knew everyone could hear me and I knew they were all talking about me and feeling sorry for me and I hated them.

I wasn't alone, even though it felt like it. Across the room, on a bed that was almost too small for his massive frame, hooked up to an IV bag that looked almost twice the normal size and a heart monitor, covered with a large sheet, was Quil. I dried my tears on my sleeve and slowly made my way over to him. He was no longer tan, but grey and his skin was cold and his lips looked cracked and dry. I ran my fingers over them, wanting to kiss them and make everything all better.

I let my fingers stroke his arm, lying limply at his side. Seeing him like this hurt my chest and I desperately wanted to fix everything. "You said you'd come back to me." I whispered brokenly. "You said you'd always come back to me."

He came back from the battle. But could he come back from this?

I stared brokenly out the giant glass window for hours, watching the wet rain fall against it. As much as my body wanted to lay down with Quil and curl up into his side, I was afraid. For the first time, Quil looked breakable.

So I settled for sitting in the same room as him, filled with the comfort of the steady beeps from the monitor.

The only thing that assured me that Quil was still alive.

* * *

I must have fallen asleep, somewhere in between looking out the window and crying. Probably sitting up because my neck was killing me. Someone was carrying me, they had cold arms and I knew it was a vampire and I wanted to scream at them to put me down, but I didn't have the energy. Why were they taking me away from Quil?

I was being put down somewhere. I wanted to open my eyes, but they were so heavy, I was so exhausted. It had to be a bed, it was so comfy and had such a big comforter and someone threw it over top of me and it was so soft. I sighed in contentment and stretched out my arms, but I couldn't find the edge. All I felt was bed, it was like an oasis of comfort.

And that's all I remember before the nightmares started coming.

At first, it didn't seem anything like a nightmare. It was a beautiful place, with a castle that looked almost ancient and a bright blue sky and the sun was shining down. I remember stepping forward and wandering around to see where I was, or if I knew anyone around here.

A group of people stood huddle together, the most beautiful people I had ever seen with flawless skin and shiny hair and they had to be vampires. And that's when I realized that I was standing in a puddle of red blood and it trailed over to where they were and covered their clothes and matted their pale skin. And when the massive group finally moved aside, I could see the source of the blood.

One gigantic wolf piled on top of another. And at the very top lay Quil, in human form. His head lulled back to look at me and he had black holes for eyes.

And I screamed and screamed and tried to run away but I just couldn't stop looking at him and his mouth made a shape and he was moaning my name. "Claire." A long, quiet groan. "Claire."

"Claire, wake up!" Someone shouted and I finally snapped my eyes away from his and woke up. I was shivering in a cold sweat and my face was wet with tears and I wiped them away to clear my blurry eyes.

I gasped. "Jacob!" And threw myself into his warm arms.

"Now what did I tell you about calling me Jacob?" He teased half-heartedly, stroking my matted hair. I was shaking. "Shh, Claire it's okay. It was just a bad dream."

"It seemed so real." I whispered.

"I know honey, I know." He soothed.

I curled my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. I was still wearing my jeans from yesterday. "What am I going to do, Jake?" I mumbled. "What am I going to do if I lose him?"

"I don't know." He told me. Jake, unlike everyone else, refused to skim over the truth. We both knew the possibilities. "But I will do everything in my power to make sure you're happy."

I started to protest, saying that I would never be happy again, but a shooting pain started up in my stomach and I doubled over. "Fuck!" I swore. It shot up to my heart. "Damn it, shit!"

"Claire what's wrong?" Jake asked worriedly, trying to pull me up out of my crouched position. The pain was getting worse and making its way to my brain. "What hurts?"

I let out a long moan. "Something's wrong!" I cried. "Something's wrong with Quil!"

He shot off my bed like a rocket and out the door before I could blink. I slowly got out of bed, holding my sides and limping to the door. A pain shot through my lower abdomen again and I flinched, but kept going.

Carlisle and Jacob and Edward were running into a room. So I followed them and my heart was getting tighter and my lungs were constricting and I was running out of breath. When I got to the room, all I heard was the slowing of his heart and the flat line of the monitor and everyone was shouting.

My eyes were starting to lose focus, and they went blurry and I lost feeling in my legs and collapsed against the wall. "Help him." I cried out weakly, before the pain became too much and I blacked out.

* * *

I woke up back in the room that I had been sleeping in, but the sun was out and I was alone. I breathed in and noticed the pain was gone. Goosebumps ran up my arms and I rushed out of bed and ran downstairs into the wide open space where everyone had been gathered the day before, when I arrived. Jacob and Nessie were sitting together on a loveseat, holding hands and her parents and grandparents were across from them on the couch. Everyone looked solemn.

I stood where I was silently, until Nessie got up and came over to hug me. I stood still, not really hugging her back, just stiff and numb. "What happened?" I croaked.

"Oh Claire, sweetheart…" She mumbled. "He's stable now. But it doesn't look good for him anymore."

I felt cold, but said nothing. I just stared blankly at the floor. "I took him off the sedatives." The doctor said and my hands twitched a bit but I stayed silent. "He's awake if you want to talk to him."

Did I want to talk to him? Did I want to say goodbye to the person I loved the most?

I nodded and turned to go up the stairs quietly. No one followed me and my feet took me right to the room. I stopped outside the door, which was open just a crack and listened to him breathing for a minute. My lip trembled as I tried to compose myself, to be brave for him.

When I stepped in, he was looking at the ceiling, but his eyes rolled around and saw me standing there. His face lit up in the most pitiful smile I had ever seen. "Claire."

I stayed by the door, rocking on my heels. "Hi." I breathed. I watched him struggle to sit up with his face twisted in pain and I rushed over to where he was, pushing him down. "Don't do that, Quil. You're just going to hurt yourself."

He collapsed back with a huff. "I hate feeling so weak." I just stared at him, biting my lip and trying not to cry. "Hey, come here." He whispered softly and I climbed onto the bed next to him and buried my face in his chest as his cold arms came up to stroke my hair. "You smell so good." He murmured. "I've missed you so much."

Inside my chest, my heart was breaking into a million pieces. "It's not fair." I whispered, mostly to myself.

"I love you, Claire." He murmured in my ear. "I'm so glad that we got to spend these last five months together. I'm so glad."

"Don't." I whispered brokenly. "Don't say that. Don't do this, don't go."

"Please be happy." He begged. "Go off to university and get married and have kids and live your life to the best of your ability. Make sure everyone in the world gets to see how wonderful you are. Show them how beautiful your smile is."

I shook my head furiously. "Stop it. You can't die on me. It hurts when you're in pain, I feel like I'm drowning. If you die, I don't know what's going to happen to me. If you die, what if I die too?"

"It doesn't work like that Claire." He said firmly, but his eyes showed fear.

"How do you know!?" I cried. "Have you ever had an imprint split up by death? You don't know anything!"

"The third wife killed herself, and Taha Aki was just fine." He mumbled.

"But I'm not going to be fine!" I exploded.

"You lived without me for thirteen years." He said angrily.

"But I wasn't in love with you." I whispered. "And even then, you haunted my life. How do you think I'm going to manage with the memory of you everywhere I go, for the rest of my life?"

I watched tears roll down his face with a heavy heart. "I want to stay." He whispered. "But I don't know how."

"You're healing." I murmured. "Slowly, but you're healing. You just have to hold on long enough for them to function right and then the rest is just a stroll in the park!"

"You make it sound so easy." He groaned. "But it's like falling asleep. No matter how long you fight, eventually you lose."

"Just think of me. Every time you're about to give up, think of me. Think of our future and our children and our life together. Just hold on for me." I begged.

He held me tight against his chest again. "I will. I will do everything I can to hold on for you."

Lying there, on his chest was so familiar and the heart wrenching feeling hit me again. What would I do if I lost this? But I pushed away those thoughts and let myself be happy that I was laying there in his arms.

I closed my eyes as my sleepless night caught up with me and silently prayed that we would both make it until morning.


	18. Waiting Game

**A/N: Just a little question here… How much would you hate me if I killed off Quil?**

Waking up after our nap, sometime in the evening, in Quil's arms was comforting. I turned over to watch his face as he slept with his thin lips in a perfectly round shape. I lifted my hand to touch them and he placed a dry kiss on the tip of my finger. "Hello there, sleepyhead." He murmured.

"I didn't think you were awake. How are you feeling?" I asked reluctantly.

"Happier now that you're here, that's for sure." He chuckled.

I sighed. "Quil, that's not what I meant."

He shook his head. "Don't. Can we just pretend that I'm not dying? Can I just enjoy having you here in my arms?"

"You're _not_ dying." I protested weakly, looking into his sunken eyes.

"Claire, please…" He begged and his eyes squeezed closed in pain. "Talk about something else. What did you do while I was gone?"

I launched into my story of the past month and a half of my life. I told him all about Brady keeping me going and forcing me to go out into the world. I told him about every single test and quiz that I had in school and about how I had taken up learning how to play the guitar in music class. I told him about living with Brady and Nessie, and how Brady reminded me so much of Embry and made me miss them even more. I told him about visiting my mother and our understanding of each other, and I expressed how much I had missed my sister and how perfect Justin was.

I watched him, trying to keep his eyes open as he listened to me rambling on, and decided to skip over the party, and Christian. If he got better, maybe I'd tell him.

"Are you scared?" I blurted out. "Of dying, I mean."

"I can't be. If I was scared of dying, I would have made a terrible werewolf." He smiled at me in encouragement and I laughed humorlessly, because that's what he wanted me to do. "No, I'm not scared." He said seriously. "I'm just scared of being without you again."

I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to stop my tears from coming out because I had already promised myself that I wouldn't let him see my cry. "Quil…"

"Please don't cry." He whispered and reached a shaky hand out to wipe the tears off my face. "I love you." I couldn't speak, my throat was thick. "Do you regret coming here?"

My eyes widened. "What? No. How could you even think that?"

"All that I've caused you is pain since you got here. Would you have rather stayed home and been in the dark? Would you take it all back if you could?"

"I could never regret knowing you. Never regret loving you." I said breathily. "Thank you for making me whole again."

"I love you." He repeated.

I swallowed my tears. "I love you."

* * *

I spent the rest of Winter Break in that room with him. I had made myself a bed in there, and there was a bathroom attached and we had closed the curtains and locked the door and we pretended that we were in our own little world and that nothing else existed beyond us.

He hadn't gotten any better. But, he hadn't gotten any worse.

"I don't understand." The blonde doctor was muttering to himself, flipping through some kind of chart. It was the day before I was supposed to go back to school. "There's no way medically possible that you're still alive right now."

I was holding Quil's hand in mine, our fingers threaded together. "What does this mean?" Quil asked nervously, not letting himself hope for anything. I followed his lead and forced down my excitement.

Carlisle shook his head back and forth. "I don't know. It's good that you're not getting any worse, for now. But Quil… You're not getting any better. And that is the part that scares me."

We both knew what he meant. If Quil didn't get any better, it just meant that it would take him longer to die.

"So what do we do?" I whispered.

"We do the only thing we can do. We wait." He smiled sadly at us and left the room.

I pulled my knees up to my chin and Quil watched me quietly. "You should go see your aunt. She hasn't seen you since you got back and I know she's worried about you." He told me softly. I stared at him desperately, afraid that he was going to disappear while I was gone. "Don't worry, if there's one promise I can make right now, it's that I'll be here when you get back."

"Two hours tops." I agreed reluctantly.

He smiled at me, a rare occurrence nowadays and touched my cheek. "Can you send Jake in when you're leaving? And if you ask nicely, I'm sure one of the Cullen's will drive you home."

I nodded, slowly walking my way to the door and drinking in his face, to remember, just in case. I had the awful feeling that he was going to send me away when he felt like he was going to die. It was such a Quil thing to do. "I love you." I said bravely, reminding myself of my promise to stay strong.

"Hurry back."

"Always." And I shut the door quietly behind me, coming slowly down the stairs. "Jake? Quil wants to see you."

Jacob kissed my cheek. "I'm surprised that you left his proximity." He teased.

I shrugged. "He never asks me to do anything. And he's right, I haven't seen Emily, I should check in." Inside, my stomach trembled with nerves. "He told me to ask for a ride home."

"I'll take her." A tinkling voice chimed, and it belonged to someone I had once seen, but never met. "I'm Bella Cullen, Renesmee's mother."

I saw Nessie flinch from her spot on the couch next to her father. "I know, I'm Claire."

She smiled slightly. "I know." I followed her to where she was leading me. "Hop in."

"Nice car." I commented dryly as I got in. I had no idea what make it was, but I'm sure it was expensive. I sat in my seat fiddling with a piece of thread from my shirt as we drove. The fact that she was a true vampire made me even more uncomfortable.

"I wanted to talk to you alone." She said, slightly awkwardly about twenty minutes into the ride. "Just so I could tell you that I know what you're going through." I stared at her curiously, wondering what she was talking about. "I lost Edward once. He left me, and I was a wreck. I had hallucinations of his voice while he was gone and I was practically catatonic. It was the worst six months of my life."

I sort of sat there in a shocked silence for a minute. "I know you mean well…" I trailed off. "But how on earth does this compare? He left you _by choice._ Quil is dying, because of _your_ kind and you have the nerve to compare my situation to yours? If Quil leaves me, he will never come back!"

She just kind of stared at me for a second, gaping like a fish. I'd never seen a vampire speechless. "I'm sorry, I just thought…"

"Stop the car and let me out." I mumbled. She hesitated, but obviously felt guilty because she stopped slowly on the side of the road. "It's not far from here. I'll walk." And I slammed the door behind me. As her car peeled away back the other way and I continued my walk, I started to feel a bit ashamed. That was Nessie's mother that I had just disrespected.

But a large part of me knew she deserved it. I shoved my hands in my jacket pocket and kept walking, head down. I scuffed my feet against the sidewalk, feeling absolutely miserable and debating just turning around, when a familiar voice caught up with me. "Claire, is that you?"

I turned my head up, my heart thumping in happiness. Something about his voice just made everything better. "Brady." I breathed as he came closer to me.

"I haven't seen you since…" He trailed off with a grimace. I looked up at him with watery eyes. "I'm so sorry Claire."

I threw myself into my arms and let my composure unravel. "He-he's going to die." I blubbered. "Not getting better. M-made me leave so he c-could die in p-p-peace."

"Claire, I don't think that's it." He whispered, stroking my hair. "He wouldn't do that to you."

"I can't l-live without him."

"It'll be hard, but you _can_." He said firmly. "Quil is not the only one who loves you, Claire. I love you. Embry, Jake and Nessie love you. What about your dad and Sam and Emily? We will take care of you, no matter what. I promised Quil I would look after you, and there was never an expiration date on that promise."

I hated Brady for being so right. I hated knowing that there would be a way to live after he was gone. It felt like betrayal. It hurt. "I need to get to Emily's." I muttered, knowing it was right around the corner. "I promised Quil I'd be back by four."

"Okay well, bye Claire…"

"Don't go." I whispered and reached for his hand.

He nodded. "Okay, I'll stay. And I'll drive you back. Come on." I gripped his hand for dear life, especially when we walked through the front door where my aunt bombarded me with hugs.

She was crying and talking through her blubbering, like I had been earlier. I couldn't make out a word she was saying, so I just patted her on the back as she composed herself. "I'm so sorry." She apologized, wiping her eyes and straightening her flannel shirt. I watched her with dull eyes, one hand still gripping Brady's arm for comfort. My brave face was on again.

"How are you doing, Aunt Emily?" I asked her.

She shook her head. "No, no I should be asking you that." I shrugged and she frowned at me. She could see right through me, she always could. "You don't have to be brave. No one is expecting you to be."

"I have to be." I whispered. "If I don't act brave, I'll fall apart."

She frowned. "Oh honey, come on. I'll make you some tea and then you can get back to Quil. Are you staying, Brady?"

"I'm not going to leave her." He said, putting a hand on my shoulder. I felt marginally better as we went to sit at the table.

I drank my tea and caught up with my aunt like I had promised Quil, and at twenty to four, I turned to Brady anxiously. "I'm ready to leave." I told him, turning back to my aunt. "I'm sorry to run but…"

"It's okay, sweetheart. Go. I'll see you another time."

"Of course." I mumbled, putting my jacket back on. "Bye, Aunt Em." And then I was out the door, Brady on my heels with Sam's keys in hand.

We drove in silence, Brady holding my hand the whole drive. "I'll see you around, Claire."

"Thank you for everything." I said sincerely, squeezing his hand one last time before getting out of the truck. Unsure of what to do, I went to knock, but Nessie opened the door. I jumped, startled.

"Sorry." She giggled. "We heard the truck pull in."

I studied her for a minute as she pulled me inside. "You're in a good mood." I noted warily. She just grinned and pulled me up the stairs and threw me into Quil's room. I narrowed my eyes suspiciously. "Okay, what's going on?" I asked Quil, who I noticed had been pulled up into a sitting position and was propped up by a million fluffy white pillows.

He just smiled and held out his arms to me. I let my questions go for a minute, drawn in by the warmth of his smile that was only mine, and let him wrap me up. "You're very precise." He mentioned, tilting his head towards the clock. It was four on the dot. "I'm glad, though. I missed you."

I couldn't help the smile that was on my face at the sight of him and the sound and the smell of him. I felt absolutely dumb to think that he was going to pull a real canine move and run off to die. "I missed you too."

"How was your talk with Em?"

I shuddered. "Brutal. You know how emotional she is." He smiled briefly, but his mouth dropped into a more serious line. "What…?"

"You know how much I love you, right?" He asked.

"Yes…" I said warily.

He was amused, I could tell by the gleam in his eyes. It was weird seeing him so light spirited. "I know that we've only really gotten to know each other these last five months, but I know that we're meant to be together. It doesn't matter how long, or how short of time I've gotten with you, you're the one. And, I know you're young but it doesn't matter to me anymore. Nothing matters more than you, and being with you." He took a long breath. "So, would you please do me the honor of making my life perfect by marrying me?"

_What?_ I stared at him long and hard, words stuck in my throat as he pulled out a simple, antique ring. "It was my grandmother's. Gramps gave it to me before he died. That's why I wanted you to go to Emily's, so that I could get Jake to get the ring for me and so I could ask your father for his blessing." He murmured.

"You asked my father?" I blurted out. _Really, Claire? He asks you to marry him and the only thing you can say involves your father._

"It was really just for brownie points. I would have asked you no matter what he said." He said, starting to sound a little nervous that I still hadn't really said anything. I felt incapable of speech. "So, what do you say?"

The stupidest sound came out of my mouth, like a mix of a breath, a laugh and a sob. "Of course." I whispered. "Of course you silly boy. Put that damn ring on my finger."

"Thank you." I watched tears fill his eyes and he slid it on. It fit perfectly. He pulled me down to kiss me and he kissed my lips and all the tears off of my face. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you. More than anything."

He held me as tight as he could without hurting either one of his and he kissed my ear gently. "I want to do it as soon as possible. Tomorrow, if we can. I'm worried that…"

I understood exactly what he wasn't saying. He was scared that he wouldn't have enough time left to make me his wife.

But I didn't think about that right now, I couldn't. The only thing I couldn't think about was that I was going to be Mrs. Quil Ateara.

I was going to marry Quil.


	19. Last Chance

**A/N: Just taking a short break from Butterflies, so I can give myself the push I need to finish this story. YES, I SAID FINISH IT. I know, it's heartbreaking… I think this MAY be the last chapter before the epilogue (maybe one more, if I can fit it in) and then the story is over… BUT DON'T PANIC. There's going to be a sequel! Yes, I had one planned all along and I'll be starting it up when I finish Butterflies.**

**So… I love you guys! The amount of reviews that I got for the last chapter really made my day, even though I'm sure it's only because I mentioned killing off Quil….. **

**My decision? Read and Review to find out!**

As much as I hated being whisked away from Quil the next evening, Nessie was dying to take me dress shopping in Seattle. It didn't help when I told her that by the time we got there, the stores would be closed because she had said that Alice had already bribed a bridal shop to stay open past hours.

So here I was, sitting with Alice, waiting for Ness to come out and show me the first dress that Alice had picked out. "I already picked up tuxes for Quil, Jake and Embry this morning." She prattled on as I sat anxiously. "And Esme is going to bake you a cake and we're going to set up our backyard for you just like we did for Edward and Bella when they got married."

"Sounds great." I mumbled, distracted.

"Oh! And your mother is flying in tomorrow." She said almost offhandedly.

I gasped. "You called my mother?"

"Well, Quil did I guess. They're all going to come down. Even your sister is going to be here. You didn't think we were going to let you get married without your family, did you?" She scoffed. "People really do underestimate my ability to throw a party together. I even have the reception planned."

"Oh, Alice…" I whispered, tears in my eyes. "I can't thank you enough."

"Oh, it was mostly Quil. I just threw it all together." She said modestly.

"Okay, I'm coming out!" Nessie called and we turned our heads to where she peeked out of the dressing room. "What do you think?"

I frowned, it was pink. "No."

"Absolutely not." Alice agreed. Nessie huffed and turned back around grumbling. "If you want to skip all the torture, try on the green one!"

When she came out, I knew it was the one. It was floor length, forest green and strapless with a silver embellishment underneath the breast where the material came together. "Wow…" I forced out, unable to say anything else.

"That better be the one like I saw, because I already picked up green ties for the boys and matching flower girl dresses for your twin cousins with green embellishments on them." Alice threatened, but we both know it was pointless. She saw my decision and nodded. "Okay, well I'm going to pick up one in your sister's size, pay for them and then we can get out of here!"

"Wait!" I said. "What about my dress?"

She glanced at Nessie and they both smiled. "Don't worry, we have that covered."

I pursed my lips, but let it slide. I had faith in Alice.

* * *

When we got back to Nessie's, all smiles, we opened the front door and were met with Carlise's somber face. "Claire, I need to see you upstairs." He said. I followed him, quietly until he led me to his office and shut the door. "Have a seat, please."

"I'd rather stand." I said thickly.

Reluctantly, he agreed. "Claire, I'm so sorry to do this to you… But after checking up on him the last couple hours, his statistics have dropped since yesterday. Rapidly, I have to add. I'm afraid that his organ failure is catching up with him." His facial expression told me that it was almost causing him physical pain to tell me this information. "If it progresses like this, he will die in less than a week."

"Die?" I muttered. "But, we're getting married."

Carlisle shook his head. "I don't even know if he'll be able to get out of bed, let alone go through a wedding."

"Isn't there anything you can do?" I begged.

"I'm trying to figure something out. He's just not healing quickly enough. But I promise you that I won't give up searching for an answer."

I nodded slowly. "Thank you, Doctor Cullen." I whispered, exiting the room and shutting the door behind me. My sluggish legs took me down the hall and up the stairs to the next floor. Everything was finally hitting me.

_Quil is dying. Quil is dying. Quil is dying and there's nothing you can do._

Nothing.

I walked into his room softly, noticing that he was asleep. I looked at him with a heavy heart. Carlisle was right, even on the outside he looked worse than yesterday.

I kicked off my shoes and curled up beside his tense body, which seemed to relax as I lightly laid my head on his chest. As I closed my eyes next to him, I realized that I was supposed to be starting school today.

School, such a trivial thing. It seemed like school took place in another dimension. There was no way I was going to school now, and wasting out on any time left with Quil. I guess I would just flunk out my senior year.

I couldn't find it in me to care.

He muttered my name in his sleep, in a raspy voice that barely sounded like him. The sound made my heart hurt.

_Why are you doing this to me, Quil? Why can't you just get better?_

* * *

My family flew in the next day and I went with my uncle to pick them up from the airport. He and my mother had a cool but understanding greeting and he shook hands with Brian and hugged my sister, who was jumping for joy at seeing him again. I stood off to the side sullenly, knowing that they were here expecting a wedding.

My mother looked at me and frowned. "Claire? What's wrong? I thought you'd be happy."

I burst into tears. "There's no wedding."

"What!?" They all cried, turning to look at me with shock.

Sam sighed. "I was hoping we could talk about this in a more private place. Can I speak to you in private, Annie?" He gestured to my mom, who handed the baby to my step-father while Danni rushed over to comfort me.

"What happened?" She asked worriedly. "What did that bastard do to you?"

I wiped furiously at my tears. "I-it's not his fault. He's s-sick…" I sobbed.

"Oh, Claire, no…" She whispered.

My mother also came and attacked me in a hug. The difference was, she knew the real story. "I just want to go home, okay? I can't stand being away from him."

We drove back mostly in silence, and I was dropped off at Nessie's so that Sam could take my family and get them settled in La Push, where they would be staying. I immediately made my way up to his room, where he was still sleeping the same as he had been last night. He hadn't even stirred since he said my name that one time.

I looked at his face. His beautiful, beautiful face. How could I live in a world without that face?

I grasped his hand as I sat at his bedside. The bedside that I would stay at for basically the next three days.

In those three days, I only talked to Quil twice, because he only woke up twice. The first time was to tell me how much he loved me, and how beautiful I was and how I was the only thing keeping him here and the second time was to apologize and tell me how sorry he was that he wasn't well enough for our wedding.

I told him it could wait as long as he needed and to stop being silly and go back to sleep.

My family was still here. I was touched, but worried that they were missing school and work and my mom swore up and down that there was nothing more important than being here for me. I may have cried a little bit, because I hadn't spent much time with them. But they understood and besides, it gave my mother a chance to reconcile with her sister and my own sister to spend some much needed time with her father.

It seemed like everyone else had lives that were coming together, unlike mine, which was falling apart.

By the end of the third day, I just knew. When Quil's eyes fluttered open, I knew that he wouldn't open them again. So I told myself not to cry, to be brave and just say goodbye. "Quil, I…"

"Claire, you need to come with me right now."

"Doctor Cullen, I'm sorry but I really need to talk to Quil."

He shook his head and dragged me out of the room and back into his office. A part of me was pissed off but a bigger part of me was downright curious as he taped up my arm, stuck a needle in it and started drawing blood. "I've been looking at your medical records as well as Quil's, trying to figure _something_ out." He told me as the bag started to fill up. "You guys have the same blood type."

"I'm sorry, not to be rude; but Quil has organ failure. I don't think a bag of my blood is going to save him."

"Out of curiosity, I matched up Emily and Sam, Jake and Nessie and Jared and Kim and I figured out that each imprint couple matches. An imprint, it is the strongest bond known to mankind, am I right?"

I hesitated. "Speaking for only the pack, I'd have to say yes."

"Exactly! So my theory is that your blood types match, because it means you have the best chance of saving one's life if it came down to it. But, this is a supernatural bond. There has to be some sort of _special_ connection between blood."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because, if any other person's blood with the same blood type could do the exact same thing, then what is the point of making your blood types the same?" He rambled excitedly, pulling the needle out and taping up my arm.

I stared at him for a minute, not understanding a word he just said. "Um…"

"Just trust me." He said, motioning for me to follow him out of the room where he put the bag up on Quil's IV.

"So you think that this will make him better?" I asked quietly, almost hopefully.

He gave me a wry smile. "What do we have to lose?" And he was right. "Claire, I don't want you here anymore, sitting around and worrying about him isn't doing you any good. You've lost a lot of weight and you look really unhealthy."

"I'm fine."

"Look, he's asleep. There isn't going to be any harm in going home and seeing your family."

I couldn't leave. "But what if he…"

"I will call you if anything goes wrong. Get Nessie to take you home." He said encouragingly. "Go on, it's okay."

I had no choice but to trust him, so I did what he said and I went home to La Push. Embry had volunteered graciously to move in with Brady and Collin, much to their displeasure, for as long as my family was here so that they could stay at our place. So when I stepped in to my house, the place that I missed so much, they were all there.

"Hi, everyone." I murmured.

My mother hugged me again. "How is he? Any worse, any better?"

I shrugged. "Doctor Cullen thinks he may have had a breakthrough. But, I refuse to let myself hope." I sighed, putting my head on my mother's shoulder. "I'm just taking a break from being cooped up there. I think I'm going to spend the night here, he promised to call me if anything went wrong."

She smiled sadly at me. "Well, it's good to have you here sweetheart."

"Can I talk to you alone?" Danni asked me and I quietly followed her into my bedroom. "What is going on? First, he goes off on some kind of sketchy business trip and then he comes back and magically has organ failure? And now, some creepy doctor thinks that he's miraculously going to make him better in one day? What the fuck?"

I sighed. "I can't tell you."

"You can't tell me? But, we tell each other everything…"

"I'm sorry, but it's not my secret to tell. I wish I could tell you, but I just can't." I finished lamely.

She examined me for a long time before she finally huffed. "You know what? I can accept that. I don't like it, but I'll accept it. Because frankly, you look like hell and if anything can happen to put a smile back on your face, well I damn hope that Cullen guy can make a miracle appear out of his ass and fix Quil back to normal today."

I laughed despite myself, and I rested my head on her shoulder. "I hope so too."

"You look like shit. You haven't been sleeping or eating, have you? It's getting late anyway. You should rest up so that you can go back and see Quil tomorrow." She kissed my cheek and threw the blanket over me. "Sleep well, Claire."

And I did sleep well. I slept right through till one in the afternoon the next day. When I woke up, I threw myself all over the room, frantically searching for my cell phone. My heart pounded in relief when I saw that I had no missed calls.

I dragged myself out of bed, to the bathroom to have a quick shower and then into the kitchen, where my mother was feeding Justin. "Hey sweetheart, did you have a good sleep? I heard you get up so I made you some grilled cheese."

"Yes, I did and thank you." I devoured it, drinking the glass of milk that came with. "This isn't breast milk, is it?"

She sort of chuckled. "I can't believe you just made a joke. Sleep agrees with you."

Before I could explain to her that I was more relaxed because I hadn't heard anything about Quil, my phone rang. It was Carlisle, I just knew it. "Hello?" I whispered.

"You need to get down here right now." He demanded. "Alice is outside of your house right now."

I hung up the phone and jumped out of my seat, throwing on my shoes. "Sorry Mom, I have to go. It's Quil."

"Is something wrong?" She asked worriedly.

"I don't know." I told her honestly. "I'll call you." The yellow Porsche was gleaming against the reflection of the light snowfall that had recently happened and I slammed the door, barely getting my seatbelt on before Alice peeled away. "What's going on?"

She shook her head rapidly. "We'll be there in almost no time." I didn't doubt it, with the way she was driving but she still didn't answer my question.

I didn't get to dwell on it long, because in just ten minutes, we were back. I jumped out of the car and ran into the house, up the stairs and to the familiar room that I had spent so much time in these last weeks.

I flung open the door, and my heart stopped. "You-you… You're standing." I choked out.

He was standing in front of me, in a pair of sweats and a torn up wife beater. "Yeah, I feel like I'm about to fall over but I'm standing." Quil chuckled.

"Oh my God." I breathed out. "How-how is this possible? I mean, you-you were about to die."

He sat down in the chair that I had been sitting in the past few days, but I stood where I was, absolutely stunned out of my mind. "I don't know how to explain it to you… I don't even know how."

I made my way over to him and reached out to touch his face. "Your skin! It's warm!" I gasped. "And your lips are pink…" I touched them. "And so soft."

He grasped my face in his big hands. "You did this, Claire. Your blood saved me. You're my angel."

"I can't… Believe this. It's a miracle." I whispered and he pressed his lips to mine and I fell to my knees after he released me. "You're going to live?"

"I am." Quil said surely, without a doubt in his voice. "And we're going to get married."

It was truly a miracle.

**A/N: My reasoning as to updating this so quickly? Fear that you guys were going to worry about me killing Quil and then hate me forever! Well… He's alive. I had to desperately scramble to find a way to heal him, but here he is. **


	20. Loose Ends

**A/N: Okay, this is the last chapter of this story before the epilogue and then we are FINISHED until we start the sequel. If you aren't following my author alerts, I will come back and post a notice when the sequel is up. It will be after I finished Butterflies for sure, maybe a little bit into my other story. **

**And as to the whole Claire and Brady thing, even if I had killed off Quil, they would have never have gotten together. It would have been betrayal to both of them, too painful for Claire and Brady just doesn't think of her like that. She's his pack brother's girl; He's protective of her but not THAT protective.**

**And this is a long chapter! It covers a lot of stuff that I needed to get through before we can get to the epilogue.**

Quil didn't get better overnight. It was a slow process where he stayed at Nessie's place for another two weeks before Carlisle determined that he was well enough to come home. A week into those weeks, he finally convinced me that he wasn't going anywhere and made me go back to school. I had fallen quite behind, but with a little help from Katie and a lot of help from Nessie and her family, who had been to high school so many times I couldn't even count, I finally caught up.

We didn't get married, at least not yet. Now that I knew he was going to live, we wanted to do things properly. Starting with _not_ getting married on 'enemy territory' as Quil called it. He felt like it would disgrace his grandparents, marrying near the vampires. And we both wanted to wait until I graduated high school, possibly college.

So with a sorry explanation, I sent my family home with hugs and kisses and promises of a visit.

For the remaining week of his recovery, I slept at home. It was wake up, go to school, visit Quil, come home, sleep and repeat. His colour was back, his breathing was better, he was warmer and he could actually sit up and walk around now.

I could not wait for him to come home.

One Tuesday afternoon, as I came out of school and got into Embry's car, he didn't drive in the direction of Forks as usual. We were driving home. "Are we not going to see Quil?" I asked quizzically.

He shrugged. "I don't think it counts as visiting anymore if we live with him. He's home."

I was so excited that when we pulled up I jumped out of the car while it was still running, nearly pulled the door off of its hinges and almost tackled Quil to the ground. He grunted in pain and wheezed, "Careful little missy. I'm still breakable." But he was smiling.

"It is so unbelievably weird to see you standing in my living room."

He rolled his eyes at me. "Last time I checked, this was _my_ house and you were just living in it. Oh and by the way, what is this I hear from Brady that you've been sleeping in my room?"

"Nessie was in my room. I figured you'd rather have me in there than her." I told him.

"Well, it's better than Brady, that's for sure." He joked. "I'm sorry I was gone for so long. Did he take good care of you?"

I leaned into his comfortable embrace and shrugged. "He's no you, but you couldn't have picked anyone better. We had a lot of fun together but I really missed you." I pressed my mouth to his and he smiled into our kiss. "Welcome home."

* * *

The little bit of snow that we had turned into constant rain as March, April and May came and went. All too soon it was graduation and I was standing in the school auditorium, fiddling with the sleeves of my gown. Katie, whose last name started with a J, was standing directly behind me and holding onto my arm. "This is so exciting!" She gushed. "I can't believe we're actually graduating."

"I know…" I trailed off, glancing up at the section of large men that were too big for the auditorium and waved shyly when they all noticed me. My father was here, along with just my mother and Danni, and then my aunt and uncle, Brady, Embry, Nessie, Jake and of course Quil. I definitely had the largest section of cheerers.

"We're still going to see each other right? When we come back to La Push for vacation?"

Oh right, I had forgotten that she was going to Brown University. Wow, that was far away. "Of course we will. I really hope you have fun in Rhode Island though. I'm sure you'll meet a whole bunch of new friends." I said quietly, thinking about my own option.

She smiled. "Didn't you get into Stanford? That is so cool, going back to California for University."

I rubbed my neck as we moved up the line. "Well… I don't know if I'm even going."

Her eyes and Quil's from where he sat in the audience, both snapped towards me at the same time just as my name was called. "Claire Haynes, graduating with a 4.0 GPA." My principal called out, beckoning towards me with his arm.

I made my way across the stage, trying not to duck my head down as my section erupted into cheers as I shook the principal's hand and accepted the fake little diplomas they were handing out. As I went to step off the stage, I hurriedly remembered to switch my tassel over and sat down in my designated seat as I waited for the rest of the 15 graduates to cross the stage.

When it was all over, I followed the small amount of graduates out into the hallway and then outside, where I hugged Katie as tight as I could and told her I'd see her at the after party later that night and made my way over to my own family. My mother and sister hugged and kissed me first, telling me that they needed to hurry and catch their flight. I bid them goodbye sadly and let my father wrap me up in his arms as they left.

"I am so proud of you, Claire. For graduating, getting into Stanford, everything. You are so grown up." He praised.

I smiled slightly. "Is that a tear in your eye, Dad?" I teased, letting Emily kiss both my cheeks and pass me over to Sam, who gave me a tight hug. "Thanks for coming, guys."

"No problem, we're all so proud of you!" My aunt gushed. "The three of us are going to take off, but we'll meet you at my place for dinner in half an hour."

I turned to the three boys behind me and opened up my arms wide. "Okay, who wants to smother me next?" Brady and Embry laughed, but Quil was staring down at the ground. I sighed, kissing the other two on the cheek. "Could you guys give us some time alone? We'll meet you back at Em's."

"Sure thing cutie, see you guys later." Brady nudged my shoulder as they left and I turned back to Quil and tilted his head up from looking at the ground.

"Hey you, what's the matter?" I murmured.

He sighed and gave me a chaste peck on the lips. "Congratulations. I'm very proud of you." But there was something off in his voice.

"Quil… If something is bothering you, you can tell me."

He shook his head. "It's selfish." He muttered. I raised my eyebrows at him, encouraging him to go on. "You never told me that you got into Stanford. That's a huge deal, Claire. I thought you would at least mention it to me."

I ran a hand down my face. "Truth?" I asked and he gave me an '_obviously_' look. "I didn't mention it because I don't think I'm going."

"What!?" He yelled. "Why _wouldn't _you go? Stanford is a great school, Claire."

I shook my head. "Yeah sure, but it's back in California, a thousand miles away from you again. I think I might just do some community college classes at Peninsula." My voice got quieter as Quil started to look even angrier.

"You are not going to give up a chance at a good education at a great school to do some crappy college classes just because of me!" He cried. "You're going to Stanford."

I laughed humorlessly. "I already made up my mind, Quil. I'm not going and you can't force me to. It's my decision, and I'm staying here."

"You're making a mistake." He whispered.

I shook my head. "I don't think I am."

He was silent for a minute. "Come on, the car is parked over here." He said and stalked off without a word. I followed him quietly and got into the passenger's seat, where he proceeded to drive away without a word. His hands were clenching the steering wheel so tight that I was surprised it didn't break. He got out of the car and walked into the house without even glancing or waiting for me.

I sat in the seat for a minute, biting my lip and trying not to let my angry tears get me, when Brady came out to see where I was. "What are you doing out here? Everyone is waiting for you so we can start eating."

"Do you think I should go to university?" I blurted out.

He gave me a little half smile. "Having second thoughts about Stanford?" He asked and I raised my eyebrows. "Quil just came storming in the house and announced to everyone that you had decided not to go away to university. And then he punched a hole in the wall and Emily beat him with a spoon. It was quite a scene." He was chuckling while he said it, but I groaned. "It wasn't so bad, he'll get over it."

"Why is he so upset?" I asked. "I thought he would be happy that I was staying with him."

"Claire… Quil wants what is best for _you_, not him. It's not going to make him ecstatic that you've chosen to stay behind and not get an education, just because he can't leave La Push right now." He tried to explain.

I shook my head. "But it's so far away… a thousand miles…"

"A thousand miles is not going to stop Quil from seeing you. Not anymore."

"I just need to think about it more. I have two weeks before I have to send in my final acceptance." I whispered.

He just offered me his hand. "Take all the time you need, but please come inside. I'm starving."

"Always thinking about food." I laughed, feeling a little bit better as I walked into the house and got my own plate of food.

Plate in hand, I searched all over for Quil, but I couldn't find him. "He's outside." Embry told me, mouth full of chicken. Sure enough, I opened the back door and Quil was sitting on the porch alone, without food, staring into the woods. I sat down next to him and offered him my plate.

"Aren't you hungry?" I asked. "What are you doing out here by yourself?"

He let out a long sigh. "I can't even think about eating for once. I'm so mad at myself, because you feel the need to stay behind and do second rate schooling instead of going off and being everything you can be. Can't you see that this is a mistake? I don't want you stuck here in La Push like me."

I fiddled with his big fingers, which I had pulled into my lap. "I want to go…" I trailed off. I really, really did. "But I just don't want to be without you again. I almost lost you for good and now I feel like if I let you out of my sight, I might never see you again…"

He let out a groan and wrapped both of his arms around me. "Is that what this is about?" He murmured. "Claire, I'm sorry that I got hurt. But you can't live your life in fear anymore. How about this? You go to Stanford, I call you every night, run up to visit you every weekend, even though it might take me about nine hours to get there and you come down for every vacation."

"Okay." I agreed hesitantly. "But I have two conditions."

"Name 'em."

"I get to move here back to La Push after I'm done…" I started off. "And we get married this summer, before I go to university."

I think I had shocked him, because his mouth kind of fell open. "I thought you wanted to wait." He choked out.

I shrugged. "I think it might make my transition easier knowing that my name is Claire Elizabeth Ateara, instead of Haynes. Seems legit to me, doesn't it?"

He broke into a face splitting grinned and kissed my face all over. "You are the most amazing woman I've ever known. I love you so much." And then he took my plate of food and started eating all of it.

I rolled my eyes, smiling anyway. I guess I had a wedding to plan.

* * *

"I don't want to get married anymore." I muttered as I looked through the fifth bridal magazine, trying to find_ the_ dress.

"Don't say that!" My aunt chided, pointing to a dress. "What about this one?"

I shook my head. "Too poofy."

Nessie sighed exasperated. "That's the fifth time you've said that! It's too poofy, too long, too expensive, too plain or too ugly!"

I shrugged, wide eyed. "Well… They are."

They both groaned and we sat in silence for a second. "Wait!" Nessie suddenly exclaimed. "Wait just one minute! I have to make a phone call." And then she ran off. I flipped through a few more pages before she returned, nearly buzzing out of her skin. "Come on, come on, we have to go!"

"Where are we going?" I asked, as she dragged the two of us out the door and into her car.

"To Alice and Jasper's house, in Seattle. Your dress from January is still there."

I looked at her in shock. "You had a dress made for me?"

"Well, Alice actually made it herself. I'm sure you're going to love it and if you don't then I have no idea, because I'm so tired of listened to you tear apart all these dresses."

She had a point, so I sat in silence, staring out the window and wondering what Quil was doing right now.

When we got there, Alice literally dragged me into a bedroom and starting taking off my clothes. "Alice! Stop it!" I yelled in shock, desperately trying to cover up my stomach.

She scoffed. "Stop being so self-conscious and here." She thrust a garment bag at me. "Put this on."

I unzipped it and touched the soft fabric. "It's…" I gasped, losing my train of thought.

"I know, I know, it's gorgeous. Put it on so I know it fits."

It did fit, it was perfect.

* * *

After spending all of July planning my wedding, I thought it would never come. And yet, here I am, at the little church that La Push had where Quil's grandparents got married, sitting in a chair, waiting to be pampered. "Please stop crying, Mom." I complained as I heard her sniffle again.

"I can't help it. Last month you were graduating, this month you're getting married. It's just so overwhelming!" She cried and I turned to look at her and Nessie smacked me.

"Stop moving or I'm going to burn you with the iron and ruin the curl!" She exclaimed and I rolled my eyes.

"You're just going to put it up after anyway, why are you making such a fuss on it being perfect?" I huffed but turned back around and sat as still as I could.

She was exasperated with me. "Well, this is your wedding day. You could be a _little_ more anal about things being perfect. I mean, Kim and Rachel were nightmares."

"Oh gee, I'm sorry. I'll try to act a little more Bridezilla to appease you."

I saw her roll her eyes at me in the mirror. "Just stay still okay? I'm actually putting your hair up and this part is important." She took the curled pieces of my hair and started pulling them messily away from my face and bobby pinning them perfectly where they were supposed to go. Suddenly, she whipped out a can of hairspray and started coating it on me.

I coughed and covered my mouth. "I think I'm brain dead now."

"Oh shut up, you look perfect. Let me just touch up your lipstick and then you can finally," She paused to squeal, "Put your dress on!" My mother and sister both clapped excitedly and I refrained from rolling my eyes, which might permanently get stuck like that if I kept doing it. I think they were more excited for my wedding than I was.

Nessie and Danni were both in their bridesmaid gowns, which I had insisted that I had shortened because it was summer now. My mother pulled out the garment bag and brought it over to me as I dropped my robe and stood in just my undies. I touched the silky fabric once again as I pulled it out of the bag and my mother helped me slide in on.

As I admired myself, I couldn't help but think how well of a job Alice had done. It was white of course and floor length with the tiniest bit of a train and it had thick spaghetti straps, a sweetheart neckline and a line of jeweled embellishment under the breasts. It was beyond perfect, simple but elegant.

I had invited her, but she had declined, saying that she felt she was intruding on the reservation. Carlisle, however, was invited personally by Billy Black and Sue Clearwater-Swan, because if it wasn't for him, we wouldn't even be having this wedding. So he and his wife Esme were in attendance.

"Just missing one thing." Nessie piped up, erasing my train of thoughts. She appeared behind me again, placing a white veil onto my head with a little green clip. "Now, you're ready for Quil."

I shook my head tearfully. "I can't thank you enough."

"Well, you can start by putting on your shoes while I go get your father, the twins and Carson. It's just about time."

Trying to shake my nerves, I slid on my shoes which gave me the false image of being almost 5'4 and took some calming breaths. My mother put her hand on my arm. "You have no reason to be nervous, you look beautiful." She told me. "And besides, we both know that he's not going to run away."

I just smiled at her. "Thanks, Mom. I love you."

"Okay, it's time!" Nessie squealed, running into the room.

My father entered, looking dashing in his tuxedo with his hair tied back and smiled, first and me and then my mother. "Hello, Annie." He said and stepped forward to kiss both of her cheeks.

She placed both of her hands on his chest fondly. "Hello John, don't you look handsome?" She then turned to me and kissed me on the cheek. "I'll see you out there."

My dad shook his head back and forth repeatedly as he stared me down. "I can't get over it. You look so… grown up and tall."

"Yeah well five inch heels will do that for you." I teased as he led me out of the room by his arm. "You look great too Dad, very James Bond."

"You really think so? I was going for Pierce Brosnan." He teased and I laughed. "I'm really glad that you came back, Claire. I'm glad I get the chance to walk you down the aisle."

I kissed him on the cheek. "I love you, Dad."

"Love you too kiddo." He blushed. "You ready? Looks like it's just Danni and then it's our turn."

As Danni opened the doors to walk down the aisle as my Maid of Honor, she turned back to give me a thumbs up before they shut. I walked up slowly, clutching my father's arm for dear life. "As ready as I'll ever be. I mean, I guess I have to be."

"Okay, here we go." He said and I took a huge breath as we opened the doors.

When I noticed all my friends and family standing, staring at me, I froze. My father tried to drag me forward, but my feet were frozen. _Come on Claire! What are you doing!? Move your feet_. My breaths were coming in short gasps and my eyes searched around frantically.

And then, then I found him. Standing there, with his warm smile, staring at me and waiting for me to meet him at the end and I finally found my nerves and started walking. Embry and Jacob stood behind him, tall and proud, also smiling towards me. But I only glanced at them for a moment before my eyes were drawn back to him.

He had unconsciously started to drift towards us down the aisle, so that he was standing about three feet away from his groomsmen when we met. My father took my hand, kissed it and then placed it in his. "I have no doubt that you will take better care of her than anybody." He said firmly.

They shared a look and Quil nodded once, before taking both my hands and leading me towards the minister. I stood across from him, my hands gripping his as everyone took their seats and the Minister started to speak. "Friends and family, we are gathered here today to witness the joining of Quil James Ateara V and Claire Elizabeth Haynes…"

I vaguely remember listening to what he was saying, but my eyes had found Quil's again and I was so lost in them that all of his words were a blur to me, until Quil started to speak. "Claire Haynes, I have loved you for as long as I can remember." He was saying and I finally remember that we had written our own vows. Shit. "When you were gone, that was a very dark period in my life. But still, through those years, I never stopped loving you. I wanted to make you my wife the minute I laid eyes on you for that first time during our second meeting. You're everything to me. You are the air that I breathe, you are the sun for me and you are the reason why I am alive today. I would never, I can't even think about wanting to spend the rest of my life with anybody else but you. Please, officially say that you will be my wife."

My lips dried up as I stared at him, but I managed to speak. "I will." I whispered and then cleared my throat, trying to remember what I had written down. "Quil Ateara, I-um." Shit, I'm blanking. _It's okay, just say what you feel._ "I never thought that I would have you, like this, standing right in front of me. There were so many times that I thought I was never going to be able to reach out and touch you and kiss you and feel you. It wasn't love at first sight for me, it was much more. It was love, passion, friendship, understanding and acceptance. And I know that I would never be able to find that kind of love with anyone else. Losing you would have been the worst thing that could ever happen to me and I really want you to make it official, promise me that I will never lose you by becoming my husband."

"I've been dreaming about this day forever." He said, mostly to just us and not everyone else. "I will."

The Minister clapped his hands together. "By the power vested in me by the State of Washington, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Quil, you may kiss your bride."

He grinned at me and charged, scooping me up at the waist and pressing his lips to mine. My eyes closed as my hands locked around his neck and I felt him spinning me around. I broke away from our kiss, laughing and pressed my forehead against his. "As long as we both shall live." He whispered and then kissed me again, finally putting me on my feet and holding up our raised hands as everyone broke into applause.

The wedding reception was at Emily's, in her backyard. There were picnic tables all around, a little tent where the food and the huge cake, that Esme had baked herself, stood. There was a section cut off for dancing and a DJ booth and that was it. It was simple and perfect, just like my wedding.

"Okay, it's time for the bride and groom to share their first dance!" The hired DJ piped through his microphone. "Can I have everyone clear the area please?"

As Quil led me out onto the floor by my hand, the song "You Had Me From Hello" started to play. I placed one hand on his arm and let him hold the other hand as the music started playing.

_One word, that's all you said._

_Something in your voice caused me to turn my head._

_Your smile just captured me, _

_You were in my future, far as I could see_

_And I don't know how it happened, but it happened still,_

_You asked me if I loved you, If I always will_

"This is the perfect song." I commented, laughing a little bit. He smiled down at me, all warmth and adoration and kissed the tip of my nose.

"Well, I sure thought it was, Mrs. Ateara." He whispered.

I sighed happily and rested my head on his chest, closing my eyes. "I could definitely get used to that."

_Well, you had me from "Hello"_

_I felt love start to grow the moment I looked into your eyes,_

_You won me, it was over from the start._

_You completely stole my heart, and now you won't let go._

_I never even had a chance you know,_

_You had me from "Hello"_

He sighed happily into my hair and kissed the top of my head. "Do you have any idea how unbelievably happy I am right now?" He asked me.

"Me too," I murmured. "I mean, a few months ago I didn't even think that we were going to make it to this point."

He kissed my lips to stop me from talking. "Don't ever mention that again. I don't even want to think about that."

_Inside I built a wall so high around my heart, I thought I'd never fall._

_One touch, you brought it down_

_Bricks of my defenses scattered on the ground_

_And I swore to me that I wasn't going to love again_

_The last time was the last time I'd let someone in_

"You know, hello was really the first word you ever said to me." He said, chuckling to himself as he twirled me around. People were watching us, I knew that, but I had forgotten they were even there. It was just us. "There you were, sitting on the ground at Emily's playing with your Barbie's. I wasn't even paying attention to you and then you tugged on my pant leg and said _hello_."

I started to smile, trying to imagine the scene. "I captivated you with my pigtails and diapers didn't I?" I teased.

"You really did." He chuckled. "You were the cutest little girl with perfect ringlets and big, wide eyes. I just couldn't look away. In that moment, you were everything."

_Well, you had me from "Hello"_

_I felt love start to grow the moment I looked into your eyes,_

_You won me, it was over from the start._

_You completely stole my heart, and now you won't let go._

_I never even had a chance you know,_

_You had me from "Hello"_

"This sounds pretty selfish to me, but I'm sort of glad that you turned into a werewolf." I commented, biting my lip. "I mean, I wouldn't even know you."

He kissed me again, and I let his lips linger before I pulled away this time. "I have always been grateful for meeting you. Even when you were gone, I thanked God for the chance of being able to know you. I love you, Claire. In that first moment, in this moment and every moment in between, you have always been my everything."

This time, I didn't wait for him to duck down and kiss me. I threw my arms back around his neck and stretched up as far as I could to reach his mouth, letting our tongues dance together and letting that magical feeling engulf me.

"In every moment from now on, I promise that I will keep being your everything." I whispered.

_That's all you said _

_Something in your voice calls me, caused me to turn my head_

_You had me from "Hello"_

_You had me from "Hello"_

_Girl, I've loved you from "Hello"_

**A/N: And… That's it. **

**Sorry if this seemed kind of "epilogue-y," it's just because I needed to cover a few events before I got to the wedding. I'll hopefully be posting the Epilogue in the next week or two. I love you guys!**


	21. The End

**A/N: And…. It's over…. WAHHHHHH.**

I woke up in Quil's arms this morning, just like I had been for the last seven years since I graduated from Stanford. I smiled drowsily to myself, realizing it wasn't even six yet and wondered why I was even up so early.

And then I realized that the baby was crying through the monitor.

I groaned and kicked Quil in the shin. "Quil, get up. It's your turn." I mumbled with my eyes half closed and proceeded to slap him in the face. He, of course, proceeded to let out a snore and roll over onto his side. I groaned and blindly made my way out of bed. I didn't really expect anything else from him, he never wakes up. I opened up the door to the baby's room. "Alright, shh, Mommy's here." I cooed, lifting Molly up to my lips and kissing her head.

I changed her diaper and took her downstairs into the living room to feed her and after she was done and burped, she looked up at me and smiled her three month old smile at me and I realized she was wide awake. I sighed down at her. "Okay, fine but you're coming into the kitchen. If we're staying up to play, Mommy needs some coffee." Being just shy of five feet, having a baby that was big for her age was challenging. "You need to stop eating, miss. You're going to end up like your brother and your father."

I put her in her exersaucer cautiously, still worried about putting her in it so early. Quil had laughed at my fears because she's had such good head control for so long but turning my back for even a second made me absolutely terrified that she was going to hurt herself.

Keeping one eye out the whole time, I put on the coffee and decided to get an early start on breakfast. I cracked eight eggs in a pan to scramble them and put bacon in another. Just as I was halfway through scrambling, Molly got bored and started demanding my attention.

Just as I was about to abandon my food and claim defeat until Quil woke up, he bounded down the stairs in his basketball shorts and messy hair, rubbing his eyes. "I got her, don't worry." He yawned and her crying immediately ceased as soon as he came into view and she started reaching out desperately.

I rolled my eyes. "After all the care I give to her, she still favors you." I grumble. "It's not fair."

He gave me a cheeky smile and kissed my cheek. "Well, I still prefer you, if that's any consolation."

"Not really." I mumble, but smile at him anyway. "There's coffee in the pot."

He poured himself a mug carefully. "What time was she up at?"

"About quarter to six." I told him, glancing at the clock that flashed seven thirty.

He bounced her on his lap and she grabbed at his fingers happily. "Why didn't you wake me? I would have gotten up with her."

I clenched my teeth together. "Gee, why didn't I think of that? Next time I'll do that." I turned off the stove and made up three plates. "Teddy needs to get up now if you're going to get him to school before you have to go to the shop."

"Crap!" He swore and I gave him a nasty look. "You're right and I need to get dressed too. Here, take her."

Attempting to eat and balance a curious baby on your lap just didn't work and after her fifth attempt to grab my fork from my mouth, I gave up and stuck her back in her seat and gave her a bunch of metal spoons to play with.

When Quil came back down with our five year old son on his shoulders, both of them dressed in matching shirts, I had to try my best not to smile. There were some mornings that Quil and I got along great and some mornings when I just wanted to shove a fork up his ass.

This was one of the mornings where I was cranky, irritated and clutching my fork evilly. Not even two cups of coffee could get my spirits up. But I ruffled my son's hair and kissed his brown mop. "Hey Teddy, are you all ready for school today?"

He nodded his head happily and climbed into the seat next to me, eagerly shoving bacon in his mouth. "Mhm!" He cried and I cringed. He had gotten his table manners from his father. "Twday we're doing arts and crafts!"

"Don't talk with your mouth full." I chided, but couldn't help smiling at him.

Timothy "Teddy" Quil Ateara was a surprise, to say the least. I found out I was pregnant just about a year after I had graduated and moved back to La Push. It wasn't an ideal time, with me just starting my job at Forks hospital as a children's counsellor, but with a written recommendation from Carlisle because he couldn't show up in person without his appearance being suspicious, they kept me around through my pregnancy right up until he was born. I took a few months off to get settled and then Quil stayed home with him until he was about two.

All my babysitting paid off, because my aunt offered to watch him while we were both working. I think she missed being needed, seeing as the twins were twenty three and attending university out of state, Joshua at nineteen was working at the shop with the guys and running the Pack as Alpha now that Sam and the others have retired. A pack that included his sixteen year old brother, Carson.

Thankfully, she had agreed to do the same with Molly when I decided I was ready to go back to work.

"Okay baby, we have to go." Quil's voice brought me out of my reminiscing. "I'll be back by six okay? I have something I need to talk to you about." He kissed me gently and then kissed Molly's head. "I love you."

"You better have been talking to me." I joked. "Bye baby, have fun at school."

"Bye Mommy!" Teddy yelled, grabbing his bag and running out the door in front of Quil, who blew me a kiss before shutting it.

And my typical day started. I kept my diva of a baby entertained until ten and I had to force her down for a nap. This kid hated sleep, and I didn't understand why. Sleep was the best thing that was ever invented and I don't get enough of it.

Forcing myself not to curl up on my bed and sleep myself, I went downstairs and cleaned the whole house top to bottom, did the dishes and showered. After eating lunch, and feeding Molly as she woke up, I packed her up in the car and made my way over to Emily's.

She was aging well but nevertheless, she was still aging. At forty-seven, her laugh lines were starting to come in and all her crow black hair was getting strands of grey. She smiled at me as I came through the door. "You're right on time." She commented.

"Yeah well you and I both know that I have nothing better to do during the day."

She laughed and took Molly from my arms, placing her in her lap as she sat at the kitchen table. "So, what do you think? How are you feeling?" She asked softly and I furrowed my brows.

"About what?" I asked, confused.

"About Quil retiring from the Pack. I mean, I'm pretty sure we all saw it coming because you're both pretty close in age now, but I'm sure you have to have some sort of opinion on it. I know he wants to be able to spend more time with you and the kids, and with Jacob coming back for a little bit to give Josh some advice on leading the pack, I know this is the perfect time for him…" She babbled on and I just stared at her, wide eyed. "Oh no… You didn't know, did you?"

I shook my head slowly. "He's retiring? But what about Embry?"

"Well… You remember how Embry said he was going to keep phasing until he found his imprint? Well, he did." She quickly backtracked. "Please don't mention to Quil that I already told you, he'll be so upset with me."

"I won't." I whispered quietly. "Embry imprinted? Why didn't he tell me? We tell each other pretty much everything…"

"I don't know sweetheart, but I'm sure Quil will explain everything when he gets home." She said softly, touching my hand. There was the sound of a door slamming outside. "Oh, that's probably Sam back from work. Here, I think she needs to be changed anyway."

I took Molly from her, changed her quickly and made my way back into the kitchen to kiss my uncle on the cheek. It was weird seeing him looking older, as he had managed to keep his phasing under control for the past ten years and he was looking about thirty five now. I was proud of him, knowing that he had tried for so long to stop phasing, ever since Emily was first pregnant with the twins, but had been unable to succeed. He was the inspiration for everyone else and Paul, Jared, Seth and Brady all followed his lead soon after.

"Hey Sam, how was your day?" I asked him as he sat down wearily. Emily immediately started cooking for him and I sat down across from him. He worked part time at a construction company in Port Angeles, just to be able to live comfortably along with the fund that the council had given him when he first started phasing.

"Long and tiring. Working when you're no longer a werewolf is just exhausting. How was yours?"

I shrugged. "Typical housewife stuff. I can't wait until I can go back to work. Just a couple more weeks…" I looked down at my daughter, who had her fingers shoved in her mouth. "It's not that I don't love her…"

Emily giggled. "Don't worry. I know exactly what you mean."

I chatted with them both like I usually did, and around two-thirty I decided to put Molly down for another nap in the old nursery that Emily had kept around for Teddy when she was taking care of him.

Half an hour after that, the front door open and Carson came through with my son on his shoulders, with Tanner, Jared and Kim's fifteen year old son, followed behind. Emily, forever a supermom, was expecting them all and had made a feast for the two teenagers and a peanut butter sandwich for Teddy.

Teddy crawled into my lap and Carson and Tanner sat down across from me as Sam got up to help Emily clean up. Carson was stuffing his face with no remorse, but I could feel Tanner watching me and I sighed, meeting his eyes. He gave me a pitiful half smile. I knew what he was dying to ask but I could tell that he was trying to be respectful.

"She's sleeping right now." I told him and he frowned, but nodded. I refrained from rolling my eyes and kissed the top of my son's head. And just as if she sensed him, Molly woke up.

I went to set Teddy down on the seat when Tanner got up. "May I?" He asked quietly and I reluctantly agreed.

Just because that used to be Quil and I, doesn't mean I'm okay with it. I mean, I've barely had her for three months and he's already hogging her. Unconsciously, I tightened my arms around Teddy and hugged him closer to me. At least I still had one baby.

Five minutes later, he returned with my babbling daughter. "I think she's hungry. Can I feed her?"

"Sorry, I didn't pump any milk." I lied, hoping he didn't look in the fridge. "I'll take her into the living room." I held my arms out for her and he passed her over to me with reluctance. I held her tight to my chest, even when she squirmed around and reached her little arms out for him, I just kept walking.

As soon as she was done and I had buttoned my shirt back up, Tanner appeared in the doorway like clockwork. "Can I burp her?" He asked desperately.

I sighed, giving up. "Sure, whatever." And I pretended not to be upset when her whimpers turned into giggles and I left them alone.

"You should probably get going." Emily mentioned, looking at the clock. "If you want to make it home and look nice for your dinner tonight."

"I can never manage to look nice with these two around."

She smiled slyly. "Good thing they're staying here for the night."

I furrowed my eyebrows. "What?"

"I'm keeping an eye on them until tomorrow. Don't worry, I'll have Teddy ready for school and you can pick up Molly whenever you're awake and ready."

"You don't have to do that…"

"I owe you for all the nights you let me and Sam have together." She laughed lightly. "Besides, when was the last time you had a romantic night together?"

"Too long…" I murmured. "Thank you so much Emily, I owe you." I hugged her tightly and scooped my son up. "You be good for Emily okay? I will see you tomorrow after school. And maybe if you're a good boy, Brady will let Elliot come over and play." I hugged him tightly and kissed him multiple times and did the same to Molly, who got upset when she realized that I was leaving. Her fussiness was cut short after Tanner distracted her, and the anger in my stomach was blocked by my excitement.

I rushed home and spent nearly half an hour in the shower, scrubbing my body and shaving all over. Afterwards, I dried and curled my hair and I slipped on the black dress that I had worn to Quil Sr.'s funeral all those years ago. It was snug, considering I've had two kids since then, but it still fit and I put on a pair of red pumps and red lipstick.

As I finished up, I heard Quil coming through the door. Surprisingly, he didn't come upstairs and after a half an hour, I made my way downstairs carefully.

The dining room was completely dim except for the flickering light of candles that were lit and something smelt absolutely delicious. "You bought pizza?" I asked, giggling. "Our romantic dinner is a takeout pizza?"

He walked towards me, dress sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and brushed his finger across my cheek. "I didn't want to waste any time cooking when I could spend it with you." He whispered, pressing a kiss under my ear. "You look ravishing. I haven't seen that dress on you since you were seventeen."

"I figured you would like it. Neither of us got a chance to truly appreciate it." I bit my lip and he went in for a kiss, but stopped himself.

"Later. First, we eat. And we need to talk." He pushed out the chair for me and I sat down and put a few slices of pizza on my plate. "I want to retire."

"Aren't you a little young to retire?" I teased, trying to dance around the fact that I already knew what he was talking about.

He rolled his eyes. "I meant from the pack. I mean, everyone else has already, except Jake but he's never going to retire."

"Wait, Jake's never going to retire? Why is that?" I asked curiously.

"Oh come on, Claire. If you haven't noticed, Nessie is still eighteen. And she will never be anything other than eighteen. She's going to live forever, and if Jake stops phasing, then he's going to age and if he dies… That would destroy her. He's chosen to live with her forever."

I tried to process what he was saying, chewing slowly on a slice. I had been best friends with Nessie for eleven years, even after her and Jake moved away and I had never even considered this. When I was an old woman, Nessie would be at my bedside, forever young and beautiful, watching me die. I shivered and changed the subject. "What about Embry?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Well, you'll never guess. Embry imprinted last week. He wanted to tell you himself but I begged him to leave it so that I could explain to you why I wanted to retire. The Pack holds nothing for me anymore, Claire. The new boys are taking over and Jake is there to train them and help them out and all my friends have retired to be with their families. I think it's time for me to be there for my family too. No more pack responsibility means more time at home with you and the kids. What do you say? Are you okay with it?" He asked, holding my hands across the table.

"Are you actually asking me that? Of _course_ I'm okay with it! Do you know how exhausting it is constantly getting up with the baby because you're literally out cold from being out late patrolling? And how lonely it gets around here when you're gone? God, I'm so happy!" I exclaimed, jumping out of my chair and into his lap. "Oh, Quil… I love you."

He pressed his lips to mine. "I love you too, Claire. I have always loved you."

And for the first time in forever, it felt like everything was finally coming together.

**A/N: I just wanted to say thank you to EVERYONE who has been reading this story, those who came back to read it after my long absence and even those who just started reading it. This is the first story I've ever completed and I'm so proud of it, even though there are probably a lot of mistakes and cheesy plot lines and everything that you would expect from a fanfiction. **

**The sequel will probably be posted in a few months, after I finish Butterflies, and it will follow the lives of Quil and Claire, from the eyes of their daughter Molly and her relationship with Tanner. It is going to start when she is around four years old, and basically it's the life that Quil and Claire never got to have. **

**I'll see you guys soon :)**


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